Animals and Work: I'm not getting paid enough for this shit - FML

I'm not getting paid enough for this shit

By Username - 20/10/2010 18:08 - France

Today, at work, my boss made me spend a hour trying to catch a baby raccoon in the parking lot. I'm a bank teller. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 658

You deserved it 3 495

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 18/09/2010 06:31 - United States

Today, I was bringing the garbage cans inside and noticed one felt a little heavy. I opened it, only to find a raccoon. A very angry raccoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 453

You deserved it 2 928

Darwin smiled

By Ihateracoons - 06/09/2022 06:30

Today, I saw a raccoon family on my front porch. There were 3 little babies. Wanting to keep one as a pet, I scooped up one of the babies. The mother raccoon turned around, made a bizarre roaring, hissing sound, and attacked me. I’m currently in the ER covered in grass and scratches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 159

You deserved it 5 292

By and god shat - 11/07/2014 23:38 - United States - Klamath Falls

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 289

You deserved it 9 085

By anonymous - 13/09/2012 06:02 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I found an enormous raccoon in my backyard. After a couple of nasty scratches, I finally managed to capture the filthy animal. After calling animal control to relocate it, I waited for hours to learn that "relocating" actually means releasing it into my front yard 10 feet away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 787

You deserved it 4 662

By shaviTuT - 07/02/2013 19:44 - Malaysia - Bandar Penggaram

Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 449

You deserved it 2 672

Surprise, MFer!

By Anonymous - 04/09/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I went to use a public restroom. I walked into the first stall and found it occupied… by a raccoon. It hissed at me, and in my panic, I backed into a janitor's cart, knocking over the mop and bucket. I had to leave the bathroom drenched in dirty water while a crowd of people watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 390

You deserved it 98

Batman

By Anonymous - 05/10/2021 23:00

Today, at work, someone found a bat indoors. I offered my help. They shouted, "Let someone with the right expertise do it." I volunteer as a bat carer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 053

You deserved it 125

By Anonymous - 16/01/2010 09:10 - Australia

Today, I was on a job trial at the local pet shop and, naturally, was doing all the disgusting jobs. As I was cleaning the kittens' litter in the cat enclosure, someone thought it would be funny to lock me in there. I sat in a giant cage in the middle of the store with people laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 472

You deserved it 3 103

By heymacie - 29/04/2016 01:41 - United States - Beckley

Today, it was my second day at my new job as a bank teller. I got locked in the vault while alarms were being tested. I was in there for an hour and none of my coworkers had even noticed that I'd gone missing. Gee, thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 139

You deserved it 1 172

Stressed out

By mystermoon - 25/06/2019 16:00

Today, at my job in a pet store, my boss had me pull all the bags of food out and restock them so that they sat pretty. Five minutes later, the store is full of people. My manager screamed, "They're touching things!" and locked himself in the office with a cup of tea. He has the only open register. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 907

You deserved it 122

Next

Top comments

krushr 3

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:04

Maybe he thought it was a bank robber?

w2z1 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:06

It was wearing a mask!

Comments

krushr 3

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:04

Maybe he thought it was a bank robber?

Bobby64 29

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:05

Sly Cooper, maybe?

Unconfined_ 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 0:59

^win (:

RyGan 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:03

YDI for being a bank teller . What IS a bank teller?

zakkyzebra 11

Thursday 21 October 2010 3:55

haha funner than your job I bet. yes I'm aware it is more fun. don't grammar rape me

SarahPicc 3

Thursday 21 October 2010 4:02

dude!! that was freakin hilarious! :) mmd.

TheOtherNewest1 6

Thursday 21 October 2010 7:23

*Haha, more fun than your job I bet, and yes I am aware that it is 'more fun.' Please don't grammar rape me. ^ Consider yourself grammar raped.

iwuvwolfz 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 7:50

lol 39, you just got grammar raped by 47 xD Thought you were smart, amirite?

nathan5 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 19:04

why not just write more fun instead of correcting yourself and sounding stupider? (yes i am aware that its stupid, please dont grammar rape me)

melanie177 1

Monday 10 January 2011 22:19

Well... baby racoons are cutee sooo..

AntoshaChekhonte 6

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:05

Eh, been there, done that. I've chased animals all over the place for various jobs. It's a matter of public health for us and safety for the animal. Would you rather the little bastard got hit by a car? That's not very nice of you.

underaegis 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 7:17

actually I'd rather my boss get hit; the racoon as well

iSitt 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 11:11

I'd rather none of you get rabies

w2z1 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:06

It was wearing a mask!

brookeec 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:06

I bet it was something different. Atleast you'll go home today with a funny story? :)

aussie_gemini 5

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:07

hahaha tough!

substitutes 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:11

Don't let it die! Save the cute critter

tigercoon 12

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:12

Aww! He probably thought he was going to steal from the bank :p Well, I hope you didn't harm it, if you ever did catch it xD But FYL for having to chase it :s

skorned 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:13

Well duh! Didn't your actual job become redundant about the same time ATMs were introduced?!

pennguitarist14 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:23

An ATM machine won't allow you to withdraw a $1000 or more.

MissErikaHart 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 0:11

Vegas ATMs let u pull out $5000... (in the casinos) Vegas ftw

underpaid011 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:15

I would rather catch a raccoon than wait on asshole bank customers. ever hear a raccoon complain??

xStiina 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:16

Fun, at least you didn't have to sit around..

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Work Mental health Awkward Relatable AITA Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Annoying Family Sex Intimacy Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Dogs Animals Cute Sleep My ex Shopping Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, my husband loves his cat more than our new baby daughter. This morning, he spent two hours playing with the cat, yet when I handed him his flesh and blood daughter, he found an excuse to hand her back after five minutes, then five minutes after that he was playing with the cat again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 432

Today, my estranged wife threatened to slit her wrist with a razor blade if I did not send her $50,000. She sent me a picture of her pressing a Gillette Safety razor to her wrist. It looked like she was getting ready to shave her perpetually hairy arms. She never was the sharpest knife in the drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 76

The Top

Today, I had to repeat myself multiple times and dumb down all my anatomical terms and symptoms while describing my illness to my doctor. I want to switch, but my insurance won’t cover another one for at least 60 more days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 424

You deserved it 161

Today, I went to city hall to pay for a parking ticket. After returning to my truck, I found a parking ticket on my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 242

You deserved it 28 076

Today, my fiancé and I just moved into our first apartment together. Our neighbor across the hall? My ex-boyfriend who I've had to file three separate restraining orders on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 639

You deserved it 5 671

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 385

You deserved it 3 609

Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 82

Today, I missed my University entrance exam because of heavy traffic. I was stuck at one intersection for over an hour. The real kicker? It took me less than 10 minutes to drive home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 067

You deserved it 3 299