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jacobemmons

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Constantia, united states
27 years-old
Saturday 03 January 1998
single

About Jacobemmons

Xbox ftw add me XLR8 98

Jacobemmons - Followers

Jacobemmons - Followed

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Jacobemmons's FML badges

It's in the can!

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

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Socialite

You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favorites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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YDI Master

You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.

I agree, my mouse works.

200 "I agree" votes is a good start.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

The list of badges to find

Jacobemmons's favorite FMLs

By SoSexy - 07/10/2012 10:25 - United States - Stockton

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 725

You deserved it 7 170

SoSexy_fml tells us more.

SoSexy_fml 11

Sunday 7 October 2012 22:09

Hey guys! This is the OP. 1) I honestly don't know, my boyfriend suggested we try filling up a tire with them. 2) Albeit being a bit embarrassed, it was actually quite hilarious for both of us. We're both in our 20s, but we still laugh at bodily functions, immature as that is. That, and I can't exactly see what's happening behind there.

By Anonymous - 29/03/2014 02:00 - United States - Kent

Today, I went on a trip to Cleveland. After getting lunch, my brother and I started walking back to my car. Halfway there, we were jumped, threatened with a knife, and yelled at to hand over our money. The only thing my brother could do was ask our mugger, "Uh, what gender are you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 922

You deserved it 3 710

Shaved

By richard - 21/03/2014 16:10 - United States - Redmond

Today, fed up with my nerdy appearance, I got my hair shaved off, hoping for a Walter White kind of look. I didn't think it was too bad, but not even an hour later, I'd already been called a "fat Bruce Willis" and compared to a freshly circumcised penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 049

You deserved it 8 088

By Sexy Rash - 21/02/2014 23:26 - Australia - Wallgrove

Today, the rash on my thigh started itching again. I felt good after a vigorous scratch, but the relief did not extend to my roommate, who only saw me at my laptop with my hand moving up and down in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 625

You deserved it 8 346

By Anonymous - 13/02/2014 15:47 - United States - Kennett

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 523

You deserved it 53 118