DocBastard

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About Docbastard

Official Fake CEO of Comments. No, seriously. It's officially official or something: www.fmylife.com/blog/1495 Yes I'm actually a doctor. No I won't prove it to you. I have a blog: www.docbastard.net. True personal stories about stupid patients, stupid doctors, stupid medics, stupid lawyers, stupid news, and all kinds of other stupid stupidity. You should read it. Or don't. I also say stuff on Twitter, so follow me, damn it. Twitter.com/DocBastard I also write stuff for The Daily Beast: http://www.thedailybeast.com/contributors/docbastard.html

Docbastard - Followed

Docbastard's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Happy ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

My diary is a collector's item

There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.

Tell us what happened next

You've commented on an FML that you sent in

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Work is a 4-letter word

Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

What'ch'all looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.

Night owl

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.

I'm an early bird, but no worm yet

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 a.m.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

YDI Master

You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Judgmental

You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.

It's in the can!

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML, that was subsequently published, and statistically this makes you an exceptional person.

100 kick-ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 quality comments

Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.

I agree, my mouse works.

200 "I agree" votes is a good start.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Friendless, or not going out tonight?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1 a.m. Happy New Year!

Socialite

You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

A new thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

I like your style

You gave a Hug to someone. How cute!

I'm a rock star

You have 100 followers. Your head's in the game.

Tommy Wiseau

You have 50 followers and we quite frankly don't know how you managed it.

Going for gold

You looked for gold on FML. What more do you want, money?

42

See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.

50 favorites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I liked to the power of 20

You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Picture this FML

You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

Gandhi

You have 200 followers. Everyone follows you. You should watch your mouth.

The list of badges to find

Docbastard's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 11/03/2012 23:19 - United States

Today, I watched Gigli. FML
I agree, your life sucks 9 318
You deserved it 29 215