Babysitter and Kids: Demon child

Demon child

By Some Guy - 12/10/2015 00:54 - United States - Allen

Today, I was babysitting a two year-old. He was messing around with a silver fork and I told him it was dangerous. He then got mad at me, started crying, and stabbed me right in the foot. Be warned, even though they're little, they can still cause a lot of pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 365

You deserved it 2 771

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Same thing different taste

Damian?

By Anonymous - 16/09/2019 06:01 - United Kingdom - London

Today, while babysitting, I got stabbed by a 7 year-old with a mechanical pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 227

You deserved it 115

This boy

By GirlinGreen - 30/04/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a four year-old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me, and that I should go die and never come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 450

You deserved it 18 512

By KPKallery - 05/06/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. I was sitting on the sofa when I felt that I need to ajust my sitting arangment. After moving, I felt a small toy snap under me. The little boy said it was fine. One hour later he snuck up on me and beat me with an umbrella for breaking his toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 802

You deserved it 11 748

Thought crime

By Son of a BITCH - 21/09/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, while babysitting a 9-year-old boy, I stubbed my toe on a coffee table. I yelled, "SON OF A…" but managed to stop myself before saying the last part. The boy yelled, "You were gonna say bitch! I'm telling mom and dad!" and, despite my desperate attempts to dissuade him, he did just that. Guess who's fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 473

You deserved it 87

Kids these days…

By Anonymous - 13/04/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my two year-old cousin was having a temper tantrum. I decided to give him a flashlight because playing with it usually distracts him. It didn't. Instead, he hit me in the face with it as hard as possible, leaving a bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 067

You deserved it 24 987

By mandy - 10/04/2009 15:35 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 278

You deserved it 3 559

By ohdang - 12/08/2009 06:20 - United States

Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 363

You deserved it 12 877

By whattabrat - 26/02/2012 05:16 - Canada

Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 078

You deserved it 3 297

Little shit

By moneyman22 - 01/03/2010 19:09 - United States

Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 475

You deserved it 3 966

By Anonymous - 02/03/2012 08:30 - Belgium

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year-old brat. He refused to eat his vegetables, so I forbade him from playing until they were finished. He stomped off upstairs, so I let him cool off for a couple of minutes. When I went upstairs, he had taken scissors to all of his mother's clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 599

You deserved it 4 431

khorstmye 15

Monday 12 October 2015 17:08

That will really fork up your day.

llexibearr 17

Monday 12 October 2015 17:27

those terrible 2's.

Comments

Sotanostash 20

Monday 12 October 2015 17:08

Could have been a steak knife...

drunkmunkey 24

Monday 12 October 2015 17:51

but still he was right, it was dangerous

Pootato88 15

Monday 12 October 2015 20:38

Could have been a machete

christinamarie17 29

Tuesday 13 October 2015 6:14

What sane person is going to leave a machete laying around where a 2 year old has access to it....

Coland 19

Monday 12 October 2015 17:08

So size doesn't matter?

khorstmye 15

Monday 12 October 2015 17:08

That will really fork up your day.

Dramori 29

Monday 12 October 2015 17:09

Forking hell that sounds sore.

Welshite 39

Monday 12 October 2015 17:11

He was practicing for his future career as Werewolf Hunter.

vaguenotvogue 13

Monday 12 October 2015 17:13

Good job it wasn't a knife!

NthDakotaBeaches 12

Monday 12 October 2015 17:15

Sometimes the small ones hurt the most

08zw 19

Monday 12 October 2015 17:19

My question is why was there a fork on the floor? Or why did you have your foot on the table (his high chair or whatever)?

stingray112 24

Monday 12 October 2015 17:20

At least you're in a STABle condition

Liamj774 36

Monday 12 October 2015 17:26

I mean it's a human with a potentially sharp object. Me satan. I'm going to go with satan

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The Top

Today, thanks to my husband's obsession with needing a massive garage built instead of a bog standard garden shed, we dug up some Roman building last week, and our garden is now swarming with archaeologists banging on about history and ruining my weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 534

You deserved it 1 152

Today, my boyfriend and I made love for the first time. Before we left his house so he could walk me home, I fixed my hair by the hall mirror and joked about having serious sex hair. My boyfriend quickly reminded me that his incredibly religious mother was in the next room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 109

You deserved it 37 403

The Top

Today, I found out that my cat has been secretly stealing my socks and hiding them under the couch, when I found a pile of 15 socks after I finally moved my furniture to vacuum the floor underneath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 179

Today, after months of watching it brewing, my best friend, who I love dearly, slept with the girl I've disliked for almost as long. It’s not my place to be hurt, we’re not together, but the idea just fills my heart with hopelessness and sadness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 829

You deserved it 491

Today, I was singing while lying upside down chewing gum. My dad was trying to focus on the current football game and hushed me. I yelled, "No!" resulting in my gum becoming lodged in my windpipe. I shut up after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 291

You deserved it 52 243

Today, after spending $120 to have a bouquet of flowers delivered to my mom, she called to complain that I had forgotten about her for Mother's day, but also praise my sister for apparently receiving my flowers I sent at the door and passing them off as hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 692

You deserved it 919

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 963

You deserved it 16 716

Today, I saw a naked woman for the first time. Too bad it was my 73-year-old grandmother, who was doing gymnastics in the nude. I can’t unsee this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 490

You deserved it 391

Demon child

Same thing different taste

Damian?

This boy

Thought crime

Kids these days…

Little shit

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