Dogs, Poopoo peepee, Drunk, ACAB and Cops: Night on the tiles

Night on the tiles

By Anonymous - 07/04/2022 18:00

Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 227

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Same thing different taste

By ironic driver - 04/09/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 567

You deserved it 4 614

By BUSTED. - 01/12/2015 19:02 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 576

You deserved it 3 711

By Anonymous - 17/01/2012 03:19 - United States

Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 435

You deserved it 10 641

By bellaskyeb - 08/01/2012 17:42 - United States

Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 272

You deserved it 4 252

Didn't see ya there

By mbrooke - 23/03/2009 04:31 - United States

Today, a couple of friends and I were driving around town and saw a lady who had accidentally backed her car up onto a concrete wall. Laughing, we all turned to look as we passed and I drove straight into a parked police car that had stopped to help her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 185

You deserved it 102 522

By SebastianMiko - 09/11/2012 07:18 - Canada - Calgary

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 101

You deserved it 2 321

Carefree

By Anonymous - 26/07/2023 12:00

Today, my wife got rear-ended and won't call the police, file an insurance claim, or send a photo of the wreck. She's too busy boozing it up in the city with her girlfriend. This is going to be an expensive lesson in adulting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 782

You deserved it 153

By dantko - 01/01/2014 05:04 - United States - Dearborn

Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 110

You deserved it 5 317

By shit - 13/05/2010 21:00 - United States

Today, I accidentally rear-ended an undercover police car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 981

You deserved it 13 768

By Anonymous - 02/01/2015 22:14 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 109

You deserved it 10 266

Charlie Given 26

Thursday 7 April 2022 22:48

Was the K-9 dog jealous of her marking his territory 😂😂🤣

SirEnigM0nk 22

Friday 8 April 2022 0:35

Damn, she must have been pretty hammered to mistake a cop car for a fire hydrant.

Comments

Charlie Given 26

Thursday 7 April 2022 22:48

Was the K-9 dog jealous of her marking his territory 😂😂🤣

SirEnigM0nk 22

Friday 8 April 2022 0:35

Pissed off even! Or on in this case...

SirEnigM0nk 22

Friday 8 April 2022 0:35

Damn, she must have been pretty hammered to mistake a cop car for a fire hydrant.

Baka Loli 10

Friday 8 April 2022 4:05

And you didn't stop her?

RichardPencil 30

Friday 8 April 2022 4:44

You'd better hope she got a ticket for that. If she didn't, you don't want to know how she got out of that one.

Keywords

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I agree, your life sucks 5

You deserved it 32

Today, I was at work and was confronted by a customer wanting to get a "Nemo" fish. I explained that 'Nemo' needs to live in saltwater, not freshwater, like their tank was. The customer then turns around and grabs a perforated tank divider and says, "Can't I just split them up with this?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 670

You deserved it 3 280

The Top

Today, the pipe in the dining room sink suddenly broke open and in about 15 minutes my entire apartment was turned into an indoor swimming pool. The worst part? I was there the entire time, playing video games with my headphones on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 096

You deserved it 47 618

Today, my soon-to-be ex doesn’t understand why I get so pissed that he has to consult his ex-wife over every little thing we do, including needing her blessing for us to get engaged. It’s none of her damn business, yet he insists he’s merely trying to not hurt her feelings. Fuck him and her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 909

You deserved it 256

Today, I woke up on an airplane in Rome. As I was sleeping, I had covered myself and the seat in period blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 411

You deserved it 530

Today, I was told by this creeper in my grade who I don't talk to ever that I have the same bra size as Megan Fox. He was right. I have no idea how he knows my bra size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 710

You deserved it 331

Today, my landlady decided to fix the leak in my room. Her solution was repainting the ceiling. Now not only is my room still wet but it now reeks of paint thinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 648

You deserved it 1 994

Today, my medium-sized poxer dog was sitting on my lap. He shook his head, managing to slap me in the face with his ears three times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 619

You deserved it 284

Night on the tiles

Same thing different taste

Didn't see ya there

Carefree

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