Health: Today, I called over my math teacher to ask a question. I have...

By lft - 06/06/2009 20:16 - United States

Today, I called over my math teacher to ask a question. I have a really bad cold. I asked him about a problem and he reached over my desk to point at the diagram and explain it. Then I suddenly had to sneeze and I got tons of snot all over his hand and arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 930

You deserved it 10 172

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Same thing different taste

By sickly - 20/01/2011 05:47 - United States

Today, I came to school really sick because I had to take an important exam. After I finally finished, I accidentally sneezed on my answer sheet right before turning it in. The teacher refused to take it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 606

You deserved it 4 507

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 890

You deserved it 4 113

Slime

By klyoung5 - 03/01/2011 17:17 - United States

Today, while sitting next to the cute guy in my English class, I had to sneeze. I turned away from him and sneezed into my arm. My long hair got in the way and I accidentally shot a huge snot rocket into my hair. I spent the rest of the class trying to get it out without him noticing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 406

You deserved it 4 976

By BoogieCandy. - 23/10/2009 08:56 - Canada

Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 434

You deserved it 8 584

Memorable presentation

By paul - 02/02/2010 11:25 - France

Today, I had a big meeting. Halfway through my presentation, I sneezed, and continued talking. I get some weird looks from my co-workers, but I didn't understand what they meant. When I finished, I passed by my boss walking to my chair, and he gave me a handkerchief. Why? Snot was all over my tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 298

You deserved it 4 769

By race - 18/11/2010 08:37 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting and someone behind me sneezed really loudly. As they were doing so, I felt something cold land on my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 666

You deserved it 2 679

Say it, don't spray it

By Anonymous - 05/05/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, I was giving a presentation in front of my class. Mid-speech, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze and tried to hold it in. Instead, I let out the most obnoxious, window-rattling sneeze imaginable, complete with a spray of snot, which landed on my notes. I think I traumatized my classmates for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 113

By Anonymous - 18/03/2017 03:00 - Romania - Bucharest

Today, it's my first day at my new job. Unfortunately, I have a very bad cold. When my boss leaned in to show me something on the computer, I sneezed all over him. A hell of a first impression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 487

You deserved it 669

Bless you

By Achoo - 31/01/2023 02:30

Today, I've been having really bad seasonal allergies. I was at work, and feeling just about to sneeze for at least a full minute, but thought I could stop it. A customer came up to me, I opened my mouth to greet her… but instead sneezed right in her face. Several seconds before my addled brain caught up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 708

You deserved it 187

By Anonymous - 25/09/2010 02:35 - United States

Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 141

You deserved it 2 826

ann_leigh 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:01

that's why you cover your mouth and nose when you sneeze. ewwwww

slatertheblob 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:14

I guess thats snot what he was expecting

Comments

ann_leigh 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:01

that's why you cover your mouth and nose when you sneeze. ewwwww

TiNyBuBbLeZ 0

Friday 25 March 2011 21:24

maybe she dosnt have arms to cover it up. ever thought of that

koda_fml 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:01

Ever heard of covering up?

technobutterfly 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:02

I agree with 1&2.

shaBAMalex 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:02

Eww, why didn't you turn your head or something? Usually I can feel my sneezes before they come out.

PatKicksAss 0

Tuesday 11 May 2010 3:48

shaBAMalex is hot

joeydboy123 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:03

ydi for not covering ur mouth and needing help with math

CodeMonkey123 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:03

YDI and ewwwww

24788 6

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:03

I've seen this happen many times before. It's part of human nature.

andre5594 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:04

agree with 1

Trooth 13

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:05

did you get the answer you wanted? :p And for all you people saying that they deserve it, sometimes it's hard to cover up before it's too late

Shirschfield 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 2:05

ewwwww dude cover it up

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Today, my girlfriend left her phone on a bus. With no way to pick it up, I drove 40 miles through Friday night Boston traffic to get it from the bus company office. It took me four hours. Bored in traffic, I discovered the texts from her other boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 716

You deserved it 5 036

Today, my girlfriend won’t give me oral because she doesn't like pubes, so I trimmed them; she refused again because they felt prickly, so I waxed them. Now she says I look like a little boy. If she doesn’t want to suck cock, why won’t she just say so instead of hinting she might if I shaved? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 383

The Top

Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 434

You deserved it 6 822

Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 135

You deserved it 6 751

Today, I got to say, "My best friend hooked up with my step-sister's grandma's aunt" and be correct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 124

You deserved it 2 721

Today, while getting dressed, I discovered that when my brother and his friends got drunk last night one of them wanked into a pair of my panties and put them back in my wardrobe. The crusty mess pressed right into my groin. I had to clean dry spunk out of my pubic hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 115

You deserved it 613

Today, my girlfriend has become such a workaholic that I found her sitting in her office, soaked in piss. When I called her out, she said she didn't want to take bathroom breaks anymore, and asked me to buy diapers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 285

You deserved it 129

Today, my husband is becoming more uncivilised the older he gets, as I had to remind him to put trousers on while we have guests in the house, and over dinner he was picking his belly button at the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 142

Same thing different taste

Slime

Memorable presentation

Say it, don't spray it

Bless you

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