Kids: Today, I had to tell my teenage son that no, his knowledge of...

By Tabby - 06/08/2011 20:39 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to tell my teenage son that no, his knowledge of the English language was not passed down to him genetically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 598

You deserved it 3 863

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Same thing different taste

By Mina - 08/05/2019 14:00

Today, my son came home from school with a catastrophic report card. When I asked him for explanations, he replied, "I'm hesitating between family environment and heredity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 727

You deserved it 327

By Anonymous - 25/05/2012 01:37 - United States - Lawrence

Today, my teenage daughter asked me if accents are hereditary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 721

You deserved it 4 237

The genetics expert has logged on

By Fucking moron - 27/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, I met my "grandson". Even though my son and his wife are both lily white, the child was clearly half-black. I pulled my son aside to have a word, but he said, "Her grandmother was black and she has recessive genes, it's really rare." I can't believe I raised this dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 618

You deserved it 394

By Sadmom - 14/09/2016 02:15 - United States - Cherry Hill

Today, I found out that my son thinks it's acceptable to use words like "on fleek" in high school level essays. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 956

You deserved it 1 433

By Anonymous - 19/01/2015 14:34 - United States - Lewiston

Today, I sat my son down for the sex talk. By the time it was over, he'd corrected me on several factual errors and told me what felching is. Now I remember why I never wanted kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 681

You deserved it 7 565

By dumbteacher - 22/11/2010 14:47

Today, my English teacher told me that I failed my grammar test. Her exact words were "You ain't gonna pass this class if you ain't gonna study." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 677

You deserved it 7 559

By fucked by sex ed - 29/03/2013 17:18 - United States - Manchester

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 878

You deserved it 17 014

Bad boys, bad boys, what ya gonna do?

By Joel Lee Burgess - 15/02/2021 22:59 - United States

Today, my wife got a call from my son's school, telling her that he was talking inappropriately in class, using bad language. Neither my wife or I ever use foul language, spoken or written. I feel like such a failure as father and parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 365

Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out

By Mom - 17/07/2023 15:00

Today, I told my 21 year-old son he either has to break up with his girlfriend, who fills his head with lies about me, or I'd stop speaking to him. He laughed and said he'd fine with us not speaking ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 307

You deserved it 1 457

By Raiders4ever - 21/10/2009 00:44 - United States

Today, I saw my son. I didn't know I had a son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 377

You deserved it 24 979

panda1o 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:46

hes gonna go far.

Mipz 2

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:17

You've proven yourself dumber than him.

Comments

Midrash 5

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:40

I am Speechless

Fudgeblocks 2

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:43

School aren't what they used to be....

thepandawh0re 2

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:32

lawlzcopter

Tasniaaax3 5

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:47

Future president maybe ?

iceildor 6

Sunday 7 August 2011 5:46

Hey cant get worse then bush

shift_love 13

Sunday 7 August 2011 2:49

actually a lot of things are passed down genetically. his comprehension of the English language would be genetic. because it's what his family has been speaking for a while I'm assuming. music comprehension and artistic talent is passed down genetically so why would you assume that language couldn't be?

knight0748 5

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:23

where you get that idea? I google it, there's no case study that suggest genetics being a factor in learning any language.

kappaalpha1865 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 3:35

Music and artistic ability is not passed down genetically necessarily either.... Someone got their high school diploma online

Sionnach 10

Monday 8 August 2011 18:23

If you'd looked for more than thirty seconds, you'd have seen that there's been a debate on genetic language acquisition going on for quite a long time, with people whose names appear in many a psych textbook - inc. Piaget, Chomsky, and Gardner - agreeing that there is a genetic component to consider. Where the opinions differ the most is Nature vs Nurture; how much of our linguistic knowledge is born into us as opposed to how much is learned.