so you gave him what amounts to an ultimatum, and expected you to bow down to you. guys never react well to ultimatums. you should have had a calm discussion with him and explained why you would like him home.

This isn't really how adults are suppose to communicate. I'm curious how you managed to get this far with fundamental communication issues.

There's no way to know how to react to this without knowing how often he does this. If it's multiple times a week it's very different from a couple of times a year.

You can't challenge anyone like that and expect a different outcome. Its his home too. Be nice to him and whatever you want, ask for it respectfully, not challenge him.

You can’t combine oxygen with fuel in an intensely heated environment and expect to get anything less than combustion. What we [FML] don’t know is how often he’s doing this, so it’s hard to judge the severity of his behavior. What we do know, is that one persons feelings aren’t supreme to the others. While you have feelings against him staying the night at his friends, he also has feelings about the situation. Neither one of your feelings are so important that y’all can’t both come to a compromise, rather than “this OR that”. Certainly, one’s feelings aren’t so supreme they can compel another to do anything against their will; that will only build resentment. Resentment turns into a ticking time bomb for the marriage. What else we do know, is that you dragged both of y’all’s children, and both of y’all’s house into your side of the argument; you out numbered him and expected him to submit. Except, y’all’s children and y’all’s house didn’t have a say in this matter. This behavior is toxic. You can talk about his respect for you. That’s it. You can talk about consequences the kids have to his behavior. But you can’t use your kids and your house to levy an argument against him. Or you can, that’s your freedom. You can also get divorced 🤷‍♂️. But if the problem is more so toxic communication, it’ll drag right into the next relationship.

Sounds like he found a loophole to the rule.

are you sure it's 'the boys'? maybe, unfortunately, he might be cheating.....

Well if he wants to hand you the scissors then cut his crap ass out of your life.