Me and my responsibilities By Lewis - 19/12/2018 19:00 - France - Paris I'll do it tomorrow I agree, your life sucks 243 You deserved it 62 Share Tweet Share
Today, I came home after being stuck in traffic needing to pee really badly. When I went to the bathroom, my boyfriend was on the toilet. I couldn't hold it longer, so I went into the woods behind our house and found a bush. Relieving myself, my butt started to itch. I was sitting in Poison Ivy. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 579 You deserved it 529
Today, my seventy-year-old male live-in landlord asked if I'd heard a low humming noise the last few nights, around midnight, as someone had mentioned it. I feigned ignorance, whilst silently lamenting the decline of my self-pleasure opportunities. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 466 You deserved it 292
Today, I heard a radio ad for the new anti-bullying efforts at a local middle school. The speaker in the ad was the school counselor… who was also my bully in high school. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 725 You deserved it 194
Today, it's my sixth month of working out 5 days a week, watching what I eat while my family eats like kings, and only losing 2lbs. It's also the day husband said he misses my 20 year-old body and no longer finds me attractive, but that's okay because he "loves me anyways and it's good to know where we stand." FML I agree, your life sucks 1 152 You deserved it 172
Today, my creepy 12-year-old neighbour stood on his trampoline, looked over my fence and started waving a large net around, chanting my dog's name. Now I'm scared to let my dog outside alone. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 491 You deserved it 2 031
Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat vomited. Covered it up with a bowl so you can clean it when you come home." FML I agree, your life sucks 39 527 You deserved it 7 721
Today, I overheard the popular kids say that they were planning on going to the local fast food restaurant to take pictures of the obese people that go there. Not only do I work there, but my family and I were planning on having dinner there tonight. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 964 You deserved it 359
Today, I’m convinced my son has some sort of radar. Literally every time my partner and I try to have sex, he wakes up and interrupts us. At first I thought it was a coincidence, but the fact that it’s happened at 12am, 12pm, 6am and 3pm tells me otherwise. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 411 You deserved it 232