Story of my life... - FML

Story of my life...

FML Approved - 30/10/2017 14:30 - United States - New York

Slides are difficult for everyone, right?

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I received my package. I ordered a vibrator, I was so excited to use it, but when I was finally ready to use it, I found out that it broke during the delivery. FML

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Today, I’ve worked out that my neighbour is cheating. Her husband leaves at 7, another guy arrives at 9, vigorous sex noises last for an hour, then the guy leaves. It’s come to this has it, I’m so bored since losing my job that I’ve become a nosy neighbour lady. Why won’t anyone hire me? FML

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Today, within 20 minutes of waking up, my dad gave me a pained look and said: "Uhh, turns out your laptop isn't waterproof." FML

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Today, after discussing all the things our 4 year-old does for attention, I asked my partner what I could do to get some attention from him His response? “You get enough attention from the baby.” FML

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Today, I asked my right-of-center best friend what exactly he hates about Critical Race Theory. His only coherent answer was, “It’s too critical!” This is my son’s godfather. FML

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Today, my roommate eavesdropped on me singing. When I realized he was there, he said I was "fucking incredible" and asked me to do another song. There's just one issue: I only sing well when I'm alone. The result was predictably bad. If it was possible to literally die of embarrassment, I wouldn't be writing this. FML

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