Just because one reacts this way doesn't mean everyone is supposed to do so ... Some people react to death and grief in a way they never would've imagined, you find out how to react precisely when it happens. I don't think OP meant to keep his girlfriend apart from a personal/incredibly sad event in his life but had to stay alone for a while, which I think is highly understandable. As a matter of fact I happen to have a boyfriend who's not the type of guy who'd wanna discuss something like that immediately and yet I know I'll be the first one he confides in when he'll feel the need to. That's no reason for me to believe he doesn't care about our relationship, we've been together for 10 years and are both 26, some people just need some alone time when bad things happen. And I totally get that, even though I'm the type of person who would call him immediately for support ... As far as I'm concerned OP's (ex, I hope) girlfriend is an insensitive, careless b*tch. That's exactly the kind of situation where you find out who genuinely cares and will be there for you, always. If not being "online" is enough to "not f*cking care", I can't imagine a situation where she would be a supportive partner in life.