Love: Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my...

By fledermausi - 12/06/2012 13:02 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 848

You deserved it 3 113

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Same thing different taste

By gimmeasalad - 21/04/2012 06:01 - United States - Walnut Creek

Today, as I was washing my boyfriend's fishbowl, the fish did a Nemo and made an unholy leap down the drain. My immediate impulse was to flip the switch. Our kitchen now smells like mutilated fish and my boyfriend won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 148

You deserved it 36 921

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 00:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 351

You deserved it 4 404

By Brinty - 24/10/2009 04:26 - Australia

Today, I found my brand new tropical fish dead in its tank because my boyfriend got drunk last night and decided to pour red wine into the aquarium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 469

You deserved it 3 566

By meeeeeee - 26/11/2011 15:38 - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend peeing in the cat's litter box. I'm the one who has to clean it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 982

You deserved it 3 905

By A-64 - 08/05/2012 20:48 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 394

You deserved it 5 225

By HK - 16/05/2012 22:38 - United Kingdom - Haywards Heath

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 014

You deserved it 3 824

By Anonymous - 10/05/2014 22:11 - Sweden - Lidk?ping

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 388

You deserved it 13 707

By megomania - 02/05/2011 13:51 - United States

Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 039

You deserved it 4 440

By lucy - 03/03/2009 05:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me what I enjoyed most about the weekend we'd spent together. I mention in detail a certain move he had pulled when we made love. When asked what he enjoyed most, he replies "putting my fish tank together". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 619

You deserved it 6 126

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 474

You deserved it 8 533

airforce987 20

Tuesday 12 June 2012 18:51

I suppose this isn't the time to say, "well that's a fishy situation"...

Christina6 11

Tuesday 12 June 2012 18:52

I feel bad for your fish.

Comments

DaddyLongStroke 1

Wednesday 13 June 2012 14:45

"The fish do it".... Lol gross

ktc24 3

Wednesday 13 June 2012 15:23

I note you said boyfriend.... Still? Not now ex?

Octain 13

Wednesday 13 June 2012 17:21

I knew the aquarium toilet was a bad idea... Now people are getting confused!

kirstyndwatson 0

Wednesday 13 June 2012 20:00

He's a keeper.

kirstyndwatson 0

Wednesday 13 June 2012 20:11

He's a keeper

drakej 0

Wednesday 13 June 2012 20:28

Lol

nekoneko13 6

Wednesday 13 June 2012 23:50

How that crosses someone's mind to do such a thing I'll never know...

pandapoof42 3

Thursday 14 June 2012 1:22

well that's VERY mature of him.

Ryan_Jaxson 8

Thursday 14 June 2012 2:15

Nothing beats human fertilizers for aquatic plants!

wubbazugg 5

Thursday 14 June 2012 23:31

Save the fish!! Dump the chud!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 551

You deserved it 7 856

Today, while driving home, I looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that my three-year-old daughter had managed to get out of her seat and had crawled to the back window. I pulled over and strapped her in again. Five minutes later she was back at the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 219

You deserved it 5 961

The Top

Today, I was hired from an interview after being fired 3 months ago from an "at will" employer by someone who sabotaged me. They called it "misconduct" but it's real lame. I was filling out the paper in the app and they wanted permission to contact HR at my previous employer to get ANY information about misconduct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 114

Today, during a regular checkup at the dentist, I got a wisdom tooth pulled out which resulted in me looking like a fat hamster. Tomorrow is my first day as an English teacher in high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 070

You deserved it 1 274

Today, after running late for work, my boss called me into his office and asked me why I was wearing a uniform shirt that said Amanda. My name is Rob. Amanda is my fiancé, who works for the same organization at a different location. Employees are prohibited from dating each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 516

You deserved it 18 548

Today, I moved back to my home town. My best friend and I had arranged to rent a house together that we both liked. I finished my last day at work and made the three-hour drive, only for her to break down and tell me that she isn't "ready" to move out of her parents' basement. She's 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 200

You deserved it 2 928

Today, I was in the bus on my way home. I was reading a book, and drops of something were getting all over it. It was the man sitting next to me who was asleep and drooling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 129

You deserved it 2 502

Today, I woke up with a boner and found out that I have retrograde ejaculation. I'm stuck in jail and can't get medication to fix this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 794

Same thing different taste

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