Love: Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my...

By fledermausi - 12/06/2012 13:02 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 846

You deserved it 3 112

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Same thing different taste

By gimmeasalad - 21/04/2012 06:01 - United States - Walnut Creek

Today, as I was washing my boyfriend's fishbowl, the fish did a Nemo and made an unholy leap down the drain. My immediate impulse was to flip the switch. Our kitchen now smells like mutilated fish and my boyfriend won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 147

You deserved it 36 921

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 00:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 347

You deserved it 4 402

By Brinty - 24/10/2009 04:26 - Australia

Today, I found my brand new tropical fish dead in its tank because my boyfriend got drunk last night and decided to pour red wine into the aquarium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 467

You deserved it 3 565

By meeeeeee - 26/11/2011 15:38 - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend peeing in the cat's litter box. I'm the one who has to clean it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 981

You deserved it 3 903

By A-64 - 08/05/2012 20:48 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 389

You deserved it 5 224

By HK - 16/05/2012 22:38 - United Kingdom - Haywards Heath

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 010

You deserved it 3 823

By Anonymous - 10/05/2014 22:11 - Sweden - Lidk?ping

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 388

You deserved it 13 703

By megomania - 02/05/2011 13:51 - United States

Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 037

You deserved it 4 439

By lucy - 03/03/2009 05:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me what I enjoyed most about the weekend we'd spent together. I mention in detail a certain move he had pulled when we made love. When asked what he enjoyed most, he replies "putting my fish tank together". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 619

You deserved it 6 126

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 470

You deserved it 8 533

airforce987 20

Tuesday 12 June 2012 18:51

I suppose this isn't the time to say, "well that's a fishy situation"...

Christina6 11

Tuesday 12 June 2012 18:52

I feel bad for your fish.

Comments

DaddyLongStroke 1

Wednesday 13 June 2012 14:45

"The fish do it".... Lol gross

ktc24 3

Wednesday 13 June 2012 15:23

I note you said boyfriend.... Still? Not now ex?

Octain 13

Wednesday 13 June 2012 17:21

I knew the aquarium toilet was a bad idea... Now people are getting confused!

kirstyndwatson 0

Wednesday 13 June 2012 20:00

He's a keeper.

kirstyndwatson 0

Wednesday 13 June 2012 20:11

He's a keeper

drakej 0

Wednesday 13 June 2012 20:28

Lol

nekoneko13 6

Wednesday 13 June 2012 23:50

How that crosses someone's mind to do such a thing I'll never know...

pandapoof42 3

Thursday 14 June 2012 1:22

well that's VERY mature of him.

Ryan_Jaxson 8

Thursday 14 June 2012 2:15

Nothing beats human fertilizers for aquatic plants!

wubbazugg 5

Thursday 14 June 2012 23:31

Save the fish!! Dump the chud!

Keywords

Miscellaneous Awkward Racism Love Money My ex Harassment Work Embarrassing Accident AITA Am I overreacting? Religion Relatable Health Gifts LGBTQIA+ Annoying Inappropriate Teachers Education Animals Dogs Relationship advice Cats Cute Transportation Friends Cars Scams

The Top

Today, I met my boyfriend's dad. He was wearing a suit, and talks like Carson the butler from Downton Abbey. At first I thought he was putting on an act, like he was going to yell "Surprise!" at any moment and start acting normally. Nope. That’s actually how he is and it’s weirding me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 279

You deserved it 132

Today, my girlfriend and I were on the phone. She heard I was out of breath and asked me, "Are you okay?" I didn't have the heart to tell her that she'd caught me masturbating, and I'm so out of shape it sounded like I'd ran a marathon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 369

You deserved it 1 670

The Top

Today, my parrot learned how to imitate my baby's crying. Now, every time the baby cries, the parrot joins in, and it sounds like a chorus of screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 192

Today, my boyfriend stormed out after I suggested to him that his relationship with his mother is maybe a little weird. Apparently having regular, hour-long phone discussions about your penis is a perfectly normal thing for a 23-year-old to have with his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 985

You deserved it 7 506

Today, it's my last week working at a gas station. A fat middle-aged man threw a hissy over the price of 2-liter Coke and demanded I change it. I asked him to leave; he wouldn't, and forced me to call the cops. He stormed out as I was on the phone, pointed at me, and called me a "weak piece of shit". Three more days… FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 114

Today, I went on a second date. He gave me the wrong directions to the restaurant. When it was time to pay for our meal, he casually mentioned that he forgot his wallet. I had to pay, and also tip the waitress who was all over him and didn't spare me a second glance. I'm unemployed and broke. He has a job and it was his idea to eat out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 183

You deserved it 320

Today, I accidentally poked myself in the left eye. As I sat there in pain, my 9-year-old nephew, who we think has OCD, decided to help out by poking me in the right eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 950

You deserved it 265

Today, I was reading and started laughing at a funny part in my book. My mom then bitched me out because she thought I was laughing at her. She called me a liar after I explained myself. Her logic? "Books aren't funny". FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 256

You deserved it 4 034

Same thing different taste

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