Intimacy: Today, I found out that my mom screams like a dying monkey while...

By Anonymous - 06/02/2011 19:38 - United States

Today, I found out that my mom screams like a dying monkey while having sex. Even with my music turned up all the way, I can still hear her through our paper thin walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 084

You deserved it 3 527

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Same thing different taste

By glittercat - 26/01/2009 23:44 - United States

Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 260

You deserved it 3 323

By DisturbedMan - 15/01/2014 22:29 - United Kingdom - Maidstone

Today, as if having to endure the noises of my parents having sex in the next room wasn't painful enough, my mom decided to shout, "Yeah! Like a horse!" I want to cry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 153

You deserved it 5 956

By Anonymous - 03/01/2009 16:48 - France

Today, I can hear my parents having sex in the next room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 691

You deserved it 4 395

Noise complaint

By scarred - 27/07/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I heard my parents having sex for the first time so I turned the TV up really loud to drown out the noise, and a minute or two later my mom comes downstairs in this skimpy nightgown to ask me why the TV was so loud and, seeing the horror on my face, kept asking what was wrong with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 101

You deserved it 3 955

By Anonymous - 01/06/2013 00:02 - Guatemala - Guatemala City

Today, I was sending some dirty texts to my boyfriend, when I heard a knocking sound coming through the wall. I sat there for ten minutes before I realized I was listening to my mom and her boyfriend having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 817

You deserved it 6 576

By whoawhoawhoa - 28/12/2010 22:04 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 632

You deserved it 4 984

Jumpy

By bunny - 12/10/2022 12:00

Today, as always, my mom slams every door she closes. I faint when I hear loud sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 820

You deserved it 192

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 20:03

Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 509

You deserved it 181

Confinement is rough

By daisythebunny1988 - 25/03/2020 05:15

Today, my mother is snoring so loud that I can still hear her with the door shut and with earplugs in. So much for sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 455

You deserved it 144

By screamer - 02/09/2012 06:41 - United States - Paso Robles

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 956

You deserved it 38 509

Doortje 29

Sunday 6 February 2011 22:12

Did you try to rescue her with your super soaker?

thefallenoo 0

Sunday 6 February 2011 22:21

this just means you gotta do the same and scream next time so she realizes you can hear everything

Comments

Darkrose16 0

Monday 14 February 2011 7:44

That really sux, kinda funny, sux though

SarahStarzz 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 1:42

WTF? it's not FYL it's FYFL (**** ur fathers life)

haleyamannda 0

Monday 28 February 2011 11:56

I feel your pain.

Angi_210 1

Friday 11 March 2011 2:04

thats ******* funny as hell. a screaming mother who sounds like a dying monkey!

TheBananaTheif 0

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:00

punch a hole in the wall. see if she notices.

juliaaaabooa 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 14:10

hahaha that sucks

whiteboy8 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 6:34

I'm sorry I've been trying these new moves on her and man she is quite the screamer o boy lemme tell ya

whiteboy8 0

Wednesday 29 June 2011 6:36

I'm sorry I've been trying these new moves on her and man she is quite the screamer o boy lemme tell ya

cajunblood33 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 7:39

I know how u feel, my dad and his girlfriend share the room next to mine

Jacob_Taura 0

Thursday 17 November 2011 14:17

Maybe she is a dying monkey who'z lost her MOJO. XD

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Kids Parenting DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, after a broken smoke detector in my home caused the fire department to come, I got an angry visit from my neighbor who was upset because she had parked in front of a fire hydrant and got a ticket. She demands that I pay it, "or else." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 748

You deserved it 2 452

Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 966

You deserved it 29 847

The Top

Today, I was giving a presentation to a group of high school kids about how being 'cool' wasn't as important as they might think. When I was done I asked for questions. A kid says, "Miss, I get that you're not into being cool, but you're wearing your pants inside out." He was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 128

You deserved it 25 520

Today, I was talking to my situationship when he dropped the bomb that he wanted to break up, and that he'd tested positive for chlamydia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 483

You deserved it 187

Today, I was washing my face like I normally do. My mom walked by as I was wiping my face and said "That's the washcloth I use to wipe my ass!" My dad and brothers are now only addressing me as "Assface." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 011

You deserved it 2 533

Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 047

You deserved it 5 257

Today, I got a bikini wax. They said it wouldn't hurt too badly, and that it would just sting. My friend heard me screaming from all the way down the hall in the waiting room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 237

You deserved it 20 042

Today, while I was volunteering at the homeless shelter, one of them "accidentally" kissed me. It felt like my face was being sucked by a vacuum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 802

You deserved it 2 178