By Crystal_da_thing - 29/01/2015 10:10 - Australia

Today, I got attacked by a monkey. My country isn't even supposed to have monkeys in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 723
You deserved it 2 816

Crystal_da_thing tells us more.

Crystal_da_thing 23

I'm the one who wrote the fml turns out it escaped from a traveling zoo

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

patrickalamo 47

See no, hear no, speak no, monkeys. Just get attacked by one.

195 9
kittykath32 22

I hope you didn't go completely bananas.

168 8

Comments

PenguinBitch 43

"Take your stinkin' paws off me, you damned dirty ape!"

16 1
buckdharma 36

I know it wasn't Davy Jones, because he's dead. Michael Nesmith? Peter Tork? Mickey Dolenz? This was a rare occurrence, cause there too busy singing to put anybody down.

12 1
sturschaedel 27

Your country might not be supposed to have monkeys. It is however supposed to have poisonous spiders the size of dinner plates, poisonous snakes, sharks, the most poisonous jelly fish on the whole planet and I don't even know what else is out to get you on an average day. Yet you were attacked by a monkey. I think you got off easy, OP!

28 1
xleanne_aLly 23

For their spiders alone. Even if I were a billionaire. I would never ever visit Australia. Oh my word. If I even SEEN a spider, bigger than my hand. Let alone my head. I'd pass right out.

10 3
Sherry_Berry_92 6

I laughed at this coz I've just moved to north QLD, and we literally aren't aloud to go swimming in the beaches (from November till May) because of Irukandji which are tiny, almost invisible jellyfish that will put you in hospital lol

8 0
sturschaedel 27

#50 yeah, I hate spiders. If I ever want to visit "that corner of the world" I'd rather go to New Zealand. Also, quick google search told me what else you have to avoid because it's either poisonous or able and willing to eat you: stone fish, sting ray, octopi, crocodiles, ants. You could get kicked by an angry kangaruh or have your eyeballs picked at by a magpie new daddy. How did humankind even survive on that continent?

5 1
mikbrooke 25

#50 australia isnt all that bad. i mean, i've lived here since i was born and have been almost everywhere in australia, & not come across any of those things. haha.

4 0
sturschaedel 27

#74, maybe those critters prefere tourists? Or you just don't even think about it when you shake out your slippers every day, something I'd only do if I hadn't worn them in over a year.

1 0
mikbrooke 25

#75 i never thought of them preferring tourists! maybe thats why the people who live in australia arent all that bothered by living here.

2 0
maggsie 11

Australia is fantastic! today, just a few doors down from my house, a koala came to say hello :) lucky no one was in a hurry because the cheeky little guy was in the middle of the road haha

2 0
swaftmasterj627 12

You never know what could happen to you in Australia

10 0
xninix_fml 36

Well obviously since they were attacked by one. Sorry op.

0 3
Twisted_Angel 17

This is what happens when people just let their monkeys get on a plane and fly wherever they want. I bet he was just curious because he'd never seen an Aussie before.

9 1
xninix_fml 36

I hope you're ok op.

2 2