Miscellaneous: Today, I got marinara sauce on my new white shirt. I went in...

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By Saucy - 26/06/2009 22:03 - United States

Today, I got marinara sauce on my new white shirt. I went in my desk for my Tide-To-Go pen and started using it on the spot. Turns out orange highlighters look a lot like Tide-To-Go pens when you don't look closely enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 587

You deserved it 50 587

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Dishwasher issues

By 3Airwalk3 - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was washing a stainless steel pot at my kitchen job. Every time I pulled it out of the dishwasher and examined it for dirt, I saw something orange inside it. After 3 run-throughs, I realized it was just my shirt's reflection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 102

You deserved it 36 554

Blush

By Anonymous - 12/11/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I wore a new pair of white pants, feeling fancy. Halfway through the day, I discovered a ketchup stain that looked suspiciously like a heart right on the front. That explained why people kept giving me sympathetic nods as I walked by, probably thinking I'd spilled my heart on my sleeve… or my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 294

You deserved it 122

Laundry Day

By daqueen009 - 18/12/2020 17:04 - United States

Today, I had to do my laundry. Being too lazy to separate them into different colors, or even check the pockets of my jeans, I threw everything I own into one load. Turns out I had left a tin of lip balm in one of my pockets. My whole wardrobe is now covered in spots that won't come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 264

You deserved it 1 698

Not what you think

By Anonymous - 28/05/2023 06:00

Today, I was running late to work so I started getting dressed and brushing my teeth. I got to work 5 minutes late, which is when noticed a toothpaste stain on my shirt. I thought it looked identical to a cum stain, and the worst part was I was wearing black, so it was noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 650

You deserved it 251

Fashionable

By arose - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I did a quick load of laundry so I would have work clothes for the week. I don't have my own dryer, so I dried them in the one in my building. After running out to my car, I came back to find that my neighborhood kids had added 6 sharpies to my clothes. Every uniform I own now has stripes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 671

You deserved it 3 379

By CMANIA - 07/09/2009 22:19 - United States

Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 035

You deserved it 6 631

By broke_kid - 03/01/2010 13:18 - United States

Today, I noticed white stuff in my colored clothes as I transferred them from the washer to the dryer. That's when I realized that the white stuff is my paycheck which I had put in my pants earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 150

You deserved it 15 032

Spunky

By grimatwork - 01/11/2010 17:24 - United Kingdom

Today, after taking my jacket off at work, I found a large faint stain all across one side of my shirt. Turns out that my fiancé had used it to "clean up the bed." I am the manager of a supermarket with 40 employees. It was pretty obvious what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 459

You deserved it 5 448

When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense I…

By Anonymous - 15/03/2025 12:00 - Australia

Today, pearlescent liquid soap squirted all over my white pants while washing my hands. I have 6 more hours of work looking like I jizzed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 114

Sticky

By Anonymous - 01/03/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I thought I was clever for doing my laundry while multitasking and making dinner. When I went to transfer my clothes from the washer to the dryer, I discovered that I'd accidentally washed a pack of gum that was in my pocket. The gum had melted into my favorite shirt, and I now have a sticky mess to deal with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 151

ohhhhshizzz 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 2:12

I moderated this. Aw, that sucks. Can't you just tide pen it over it though?

cactus_fml 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 6:14

I think people take the phrase F my life too literally. It's not something you say only when your life is seriously ******. It's like something you say when something irritating or awkward or ironic happens, like if you waited for 30 minutes in line to get an ice cream, and then immediately dropped it, and it also happened to land on your really expensive white shoes. On a side note, when I first read this I thought it said marijuana sauce and was confused for a second. Lol, and I don't even smoke weed.

Comments

whatwasthatbich 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 8:43

R TARD

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 27 June 2009 9:04

Maybe it's time to break out the creativity crayons! Or maybe just teach kids to get to the point, instead of taking up extra word space.

ItsTheKanninbal 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 9:15

Lol its just a t shirt....

girlwiththebow 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 9:28

LOSER!!!

Shizden 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 9:33

YDI for wearing clothes. YDI for having internet connection. YDI for eating marijuana sauce.

shostakovich 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 9:37

YDI for being human and having the ability to make mistakes. YDI for a white shirt. YDI for acting immediately on cleaning up the mess. YDI for caring about your clothes. etc

emmmilyyy 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 10:12

write a country song and get over it. maybe get some glasses too?

24788 6

Saturday 27 June 2009 11:57

Probably should of read the pen.

itsgen 16

Saturday 27 June 2009 13:16

hahaha psh i dnt care what #1 thinks this is sooooo haliours and yea i think its an fml haha sry dude you gotta be more careful next time

frozenicecream 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 14:25

moron

thelarkscaw 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 16:25

i think its fake. i can see almost grabbing the highlighter, but you would totally realize it by the time it got to your shirt. unless you're totally retarded.