Kids: Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last... - FML

By ThaBoss12 - 01/11/2014 22:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 763

You deserved it 3 526

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Same thing different taste

By CaityLovesBo - 05/02/2012 18:49 - United States

Today, my mom went to the store. She said she was feeling generous, and had gotten everyone a little treat. My brothers each got candy and a movie. I got acne medication. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 637

You deserved it 3 545

By trick or not treat - 31/10/2009 22:26 - France

Today, I bought fifteen bags of candy for the trick-or-treaters. I sat outside with a bowl of candy the whole night. Only one person came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 387

You deserved it 7 228

By candice - 01/11/2011 09:09 - Reserved

Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 528

You deserved it 46 596

By Anonymous - 31/10/2010 00:00 - United States

Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 426

You deserved it 4 059

Trick it is, then

By Tricked - 01/11/2023 09:00

Today, after a stressful shift at work, I bought three bags of candy to hand out to trick-or-treaters tonight. I didn’t realize until I got home that one bag had a hole in it, and there were three empty M&M wrappers inside. My grocery store sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 81

Halloween, the long wait

By androidjezus - 03/11/2019 18:30

Today, I asked my girlfriend to get a bunch of candy for our first Halloween at our new house, so she got $60 worth. We got into an argument about who was going to give it out. It’s now 9 p.m. No one came to our door all night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 779

You deserved it 472

By Anonymous - 01/11/2011 00:36 - United States

Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 312

You deserved it 3 518

By aggghghgh - 14/05/2016 08:51

Today, I found out my whole family has been mistakenly using the same toothbrush for over a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 544

You deserved it 2 121

By uofpalum - 19/03/2009 01:41 - United States

Today, I stayed over at my grandparents' house. I woke up and had to brush my teeth. My grandma asked if I had found a toothbrush to use. I told her that I used my old purple toothbrush. She told me that was the toothbrush she used to brush her toenails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 478

You deserved it 10 808

By DENTALITY - 23/05/2015 11:06 - Norway

Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 055

You deserved it 3 668

Next

Top comments

UnidentifiedFun 37

Sunday 2 November 2014 6:46

I've heard of apples and granola bars, but toothbrushes are the next level!

gurbism 16

Sunday 2 November 2014 6:54

No one egged your house?

Comments

K3YD0N 13

Sunday 2 November 2014 8:10

Im comming back soon, just gotta buy eggs and toilet paper

NikkiSamm 21

Sunday 2 November 2014 8:44

Not that bad... I once went to a house that gave out pocket bibles and the owner have a speech about how Halloween was the Devils holiday and I was a sinner for going trick or treating lmao

Ichiya 29

Sunday 2 November 2014 15:43

Throw the bible back and summon demons to eat his eternal soul.

emadrid 0

Sunday 2 November 2014 9:39

I would be super excited if I got a toothbrush even as a child. Sounds like your mother is brilliant, Work with so many children having food allergies

ThaBoss12 12

Tuesday 4 November 2014 4:01

My brother has food allergies. That's why she doesn't give out candy, so he won't be tempted to eat some. Still sucks to be known as the lamest house in the neighborhood..

thefmlman2011 36

Sunday 2 November 2014 9:59

I got hubba Bubba from a sweet old lady one year.

BoWDoWN123 3

Sunday 2 November 2014 12:02

Wow

interesting33 36

Sunday 2 November 2014 13:06

I really hate the trick part of Halloween though - you should not be punished for not giving free sweets to people. It is blackmail and can be really upsetting.

LostInTheZone11 29

Sunday 2 November 2014 13:07

The only time a toothbrush is ok to get, if if you also got those Mary Jane Peanut Butter Kisses. (Those Orange and Black wrapped candies.) Because, then you are gonna need the brush to get those crap candies out of your mouth.

mosquito19 14

Sunday 2 November 2014 13:27

doed the handle made of candy?

demonfacee 14

Sunday 2 November 2014 15:10

Sounds like your mom cares about dental hygiene.

lulinator 40

Sunday 2 November 2014 16:05

I loved getting toothbrushes when I went Trick or Treating as a kid. I saw a few in some buckets this year as I was handing out candy, and was kind of jealous that my kids didn't find that house to get one. They also love getting new toothbrushes.

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The Top

Today, my brother's girlfriend came over to visit and we got to talking about books. Thinking she'd be interested, I suggested a few. She responded that she "only reads good literature." The only books I've ever seen her read are Fifty Shades of Gray and the Twilight saga. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 125

Today, I found out that when my best friend and I were kids, our parents would cancel playdates when either of us opted to not go to church. They said it would, "strengthen our faith." We are now both adults and staunch atheists for that reason, and we're spending way more time together to make up for this crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 144

The Top

Today, I overheard a lady tell her child in a store that, “If you don’t stop crying, I’ll tell that guy over there to take you away.” She was referring to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 102

Today, I'm so hopelessly lonely that I've agreed to meet up with my ex for some semblance of friendship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 236

Today, my daughter would rather make payments on a payment plan for a $2000 Gucci purse, yet she refuses to move out and get a place on her own, or chip in for rent. She’s 29. FML

I agree, your life sucks 593

You deserved it 1 149

Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 482

You deserved it 60 802

Today, it was supposed to be my first date with a girl I've been speaking to for three months. Last night, she revealed that she's still married, that her husband is "not so bad", and then confessed it all to him and blocked me. It was gonna be my first date in six years, after the last one stalked me across the country. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 082

You deserved it 152

Today, I noticed that my wife changed her status on Facebook to "widow" and a lot of strange guys commented saying stuff like "Finally." Last I checked, I'm not dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 519

You deserved it 3 259