Miscellaneous: Today, my boss came to my cubicle to give me my annual performance... - FML

By ChrisC - 10/07/2009 21:21 - United States

Today, my boss came to my cubicle to give me my annual performance bonus. I was asleep at my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 442

You deserved it 62 217

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Same thing different taste

By Sleepy - 09/10/2014 14:10 - United Kingdom - Hayes

Today, I fell asleep at my desk. It's bad enough that it was for 45 minutes and that I was snoring. What makes it worse? My boss woke me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 007

You deserved it 15 667

Bye bye

By Dan - 17/11/2020 22:58

Today, I fell asleep at work. I got woke up by my boss with a coffee and a referral letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 1 077

By sleepytime - 05/10/2009 16:36 - United States

Today, I was really, REALLY tired at work. I went to the restroom to take a little break, and must have dozed off, because I was awoken by my boss, knocking on the door of the stall. Apparently, I had been snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 689

You deserved it 32 918

By Anonymous - 13/05/2014 19:23 - Canada - Charlottetown

Today, everyone at the office was finally presented with the bonuses our boss had promised to pay us by the end of last year. Turns out he was never authorized to promise any such thing, so he ended up just giving us signed "thank you" letters instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 913

You deserved it 3 421

By missedfistbump - 20/03/2013 14:31 - United States

Today, I was talking to my boss and he said I was awesome. He went to fist bump me and I missed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 625

You deserved it 8 678

By Coach - 30/10/2009 13:19 - United States

Today, I was woken up from a phone call from my boss. He asked if I had been asleep. I told him I wasn't, that I was in my car on the way to work. Then my alarm went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 341

You deserved it 41 627

By Shameonme - 26/10/2008 16:04 - Morocco

Today, I yelled out while I was asleep. However, I was sleeping during a very important meeting with customers and my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 580

You deserved it 61 146

By XoXonedirectionXoXo - 23/06/2012 22:21 - United States - Eden Prairie

Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke up, I tried to quietly sneak back to my desk, only to be caught by my boss. He immediately sent me packing and gave his "best wishes" for me in the unemployment line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 267

You deserved it 32 417

By Anonymous - 25/10/2013 09:01 - United States - Cedar Park

Today, I worked 24 hours straight fixing my company's servers. After it was over, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and promptly fell asleep at my desk. My boss found me an hour later, refused to listen to me, and fired me for sleeping on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 622

You deserved it 4 674

Most likely

By lukey101 - 11/02/2021 14:01 - Australia

Today, I had my half-year performance review. My boss arrived 15 minutes late, paid basically no attention to my presentation, and left 30 minutes early. I guess I’ll go fuck myself then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 118

Next

Top comments

Fisshie 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 1:28

What would suck more is if you were dreaming of getting the big bonus and woke up to a sticky-note on you forehead saying "YOU'RE FIRED!".

kdawg86 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 1:36

presumably your bonus was around $5

Comments

sithwithashotgun 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 5:10

Dude, that sucks big time. Were you at least on break? If not, your boss was probably quite pissed off.

SexyBeast101 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 5:26

YDI. Unless you had a really long night or something. But either way, YDI. So sorry for you.

seb12992 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 5:35

Another FML about someone slacking off on the job and getting caught by their boss...

Nick402 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 6:31

Oh, the irony.

U_idiot 1

Saturday 11 July 2009 7:22

LOL YDI. I do believe if there was scheduled nap time during the work day productivity would be much higher though... But for now, rest up before work perhaps and don't be lazy?

islaphippos 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 8:11

well did you get the bonus? If you did its definitely not an FML

AnaMaree 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 8:32

Fired.

somaturee 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 9:31

Clearly, YDI for sleeping on the job.

Nightfallz 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 11:37

this has been done several times recently. also YDI retard. your getting paid to work not to sleep. hopefully you are jobless and he hired a more compitent worker.

tylenol123 0

Monday 18 July 2011 6:02

i like that comment :) and i agree 190%

Gotmilk_fml 8

Saturday 11 July 2009 13:15

Ahah, I love this one!

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The Top

Today, the host family that I'm staying with in China gave me a small milk box to drink. It tasted a bit tangy and sour, but I thought that was probably just the taste of milk in China. Trying to be polite, I practically chugged the whole box. Later, I found out that it had expired 20 days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 543

You deserved it 372

Today, I finally felt well enough to take an actual shower after having surgery on my back. It took five minutes to stand up, ten minutes to get to the shower, and another ten minutes to get in. The pilot light went out in less than five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 728

You deserved it 2 411

The Top

Today, I was running the 100m sprint in a track meet. Me and another girl were tied for dead last. When we finished, she complained, "It's so embarrassing how slow I am today. I have shin splints. What happened to you?" I was actually running my hardest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 665

You deserved it 7 608

Today, my girlfriend thinks I'm sex-obsessed because of the number of times I've asked for it. I've asked exactly 3 times this year, one of which was on my birthday. She said no all 3 times. I'm usually too scared of her temper to even try. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 782

You deserved it 1 389

Today, my sister and I got fitted for bridesmaid's dresses. It was pretty sheer material, so I took off my bright pink thong and left it on the changing room hanger. As I was looking at myself in the mirror, a woman came out of the room holding my thong. She had tried it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 680

You deserved it 11 009

Today, I went out on my first date in 2 months. My sister and her friends were also at the same restaurant we went to. I decided to ignore them but they didn't. As a joke, they though it would be funny if her friend came up and said, "I had fun last night, we should do it again". My date left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 386

You deserved it 2 729

Today, after struggling with breastfeeding and trying to build up my milk supply, I was finally able to pump a full 6 oz! I celebrated by immediately spilling it all over my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 229

You deserved it 1 440

Today, my parents got a call from my English teacher. She told them that I have 14 days of detention because I've been cutting class. I've been there every day, but apparently she never noticed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 397

You deserved it 3 173