Miscellaneous: Today, my girlfriend and I went to a bar during Irishfest. When...

By nV1ous - 17/09/2009 18:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I went to a bar during Irishfest. When I returned to my girlfriend she was crying and told me that this guy pushed her. I confronted the guy and poured my beer on him who just happened to be the chief of police. He was trying to make room for a guy in a wheelchair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 114

You deserved it 56 992

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/06/2009 18:57 - Canada

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 648

You deserved it 13 129

By justafriend - 28/05/2017 00:00

Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 254

You deserved it 382

By BUSTED. - 01/12/2015 19:02 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 579

You deserved it 3 711

This Charming Man

By Anonymous - 01/03/2020 18:00

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad. It didn't go well since unfortunately he’s the guy I had to remove from the club I’m the bouncer at, and had to report to the police for getting drunk, stroking himself over his pants and taking photos in the ladies toilets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 957

You deserved it 109

By ournhd - 13/11/2009 06:11 - United States

Today, I got bailed out of jail. I was there because I saw a girl being hit by her boyfriend. I rushed over to help only to have her hit me repeatedly. The cops came and she blamed her bruises on me. The boyfriend corroborated her story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 277

You deserved it 3 135

By brodinn - 11/04/2014 13:48 - United States - Florence

Today, I watched a drunk guy getting thrown out of a bar, then get tased on the sidewalk outside. He was our designated driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 321

You deserved it 5 876

He started it, sorry

By Anonymous - 13/04/2022 15:01 - United States

Today, a drunk in a wheelchair tried to fight me. I walked away as he kept hurling insults. He then rammed his chair into my legs, making me fall. I walked away again. Upon the second time, I got up and punched him dead in his face, knocking him backward. I was tackled to the ground for hitting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 072

You deserved it 171

Fingered

By Anonymous - 13/04/2024 21:00 - United States

Today, I got questioned by the police. Last night I was at a party when a bully of a kid who happened to be an aspiring MMA coach and local fighter was picking on me, stole my alcohol and threw me out of the party. I heard he got stabbed by someone else he was picking on after I left. The police insist it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 108

Better safe than sorry, but…

By Anonymous - 25/10/2023 00:00

Today, I got tackled by a bouncer in a club and handed to police for spiking my date's drink. It was an ice cube. I'd asked the barman for some ice cubes, which I put in both my drink and hers, and someone assumed I was slipping her a roofie and reported me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 120

By ronboy - 26/11/2012 23:11 - United States - Columbus

Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 749

You deserved it 2 815

mozrox 0

Thursday 17 September 2009 23:31

Uh... Is your girlfriend really that sensitive? Who the hell cries because someone moved them out of the way? YDI for having a pussy as a girlfriend.

jonnymohio 2

Thursday 17 September 2009 23:38

You and your girlfriend are both at fault. She, for being a crybaby drunk, and you for being a hothead drunk. Take some anger management classes.

Comments

The_Dame 0

Saturday 19 September 2009 4:53

Sorry, friend, but your girlfriend's a ******' wuss.

Lifelooser_fml 0

Saturday 19 September 2009 5:37

Police are horrible creatures, 99% or them. It's a pitty, there is nothing you can do about it and police know it. I bet he 'moved' her asside nice and hard. I don't know about the police there, but cops here in Aust have no shame. Don't come and visit, they love ******* up tourists.

ladiesman14 0

Saturday 19 September 2009 6:37

ancient chinese scholar say 2 pussy in relationship bad unless both are lesbian.

allie2590 31

Saturday 19 September 2009 8:04

You're an idiot, and your girlfriend needs to stop being such a crybaby. People get pushed in bars all the time. 99% of the time it's not even intentional.

plasticspoons 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 18:34

YDI for having a shitty girlfriend. You have my sympathies, friend.

ravenscorne 0

Monday 21 September 2009 1:28

wow. Both of you need to GROW the **** up! I mean, as a girl you don't cry just because someone pushed you. And as a guy confronting another man, you don't just go up to them and pour beer all over their head. That's something even 12 year olds can handle, so you have no sympathy from me. In my opinion, if either one of you had even a thought in your head, this situation could've been been avoided. That said, a 12 year old can handle it with more grace than you could. YDI.

mimi0mfg 1

Monday 21 September 2009 6:25

the chief of police should post a fml: today, while i was helping a guy in a wheelchair to get into a bar, i accidentally pushed a woman and her boyfriend dumped beer all over me.

HornetsHornets 0

Thursday 24 September 2009 20:12

Path of peace, ************, do you know it?

Darthbane2007 17

Sunday 25 October 2009 15:26

You and your girlfriend deserve it. Unless the Police Chief physically pushed her out of the way with enough force as to knock her down, she's a wuss. And you shouldn't have poured beer on him. Say for instance the guy wasn't the police chief, and he was just a regular joe with his buddies, and they saw you pour beer over him?