Love: Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because...

By Anonymous - 21/09/2011 18:39 - United States

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 976

You deserved it 4 515

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/07/2014 01:27 - United States - Sandston

Today, my boyfriend said that he doesn't have to marry me because we coincidentally have the same last name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 764

You deserved it 5 641

By new name - 06/11/2012 22:03 - United States - Storrs Mansfield

Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 346

You deserved it 16 595

By singleagain - 15/05/2012 01:09 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying that the only thing he would change about me is my last name. I later told him that I wanted to keep my last name after the marriage. I'm now single again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 030

You deserved it 42 497

By unloved - 18/01/2010 05:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife changed her name back to her maiden name. Why? So people would stop asking questions about us. We have been married for 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 040

You deserved it 2 754

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 22:10 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out my wife named our son after her ex-lover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 827

You deserved it 3 393

By Anonymous - 29/10/2010 03:36 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife named our son after her ex boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 163

You deserved it 2 923

Bee in her bonnet

By Anonymous - 12/06/2024 13:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my wife bumped into my ex-girlfriend from before we met. My wife said that she’s glad she's hotter than her, and we laughed. She has now mentioned this every hour since then, and now insists I list the reasons why she’s hotter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 103

By Anonymous - 16/04/2018 19:00

Today, my wife sent me a text expressing her "love and thinking to the future with you, Chad". Too bad my name isn't Chad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 878

You deserved it 266

The patriarchy rules

By hyphen - 09/12/2020 18:01 - United States - Denver

Today, I was talking to a new friend when I told him my last name. It’s hyphenated. He then left and declared me to be a "stuck-up bitch" who thinks she’s "too good to take a man’s last name." This is the name I was born with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 139

By Its_Sinon - 12/11/2015 08:38 - United States - Oceanside

Today, I got married. After the ceremony, my sister asked to talk to me. I followed her and she told me that we are no longer related because we don't have the same last name anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 455

You deserved it 1 857

tooiecutie 6

Thursday 22 September 2011 0:22

bobaganush?

MaskedAspen 6

Thursday 22 September 2011 0:22

Norris ?

Comments

emily_love 3

Sunday 6 November 2011 2:47

The only reason I wont marry is because I have a cool last name

jsx12345 0

Sunday 6 November 2011 5:28

,p Ppl

LithiumJoker 7

Monday 12 December 2011 23:21

mine is Day, so I don't intend to get married. And if I do, it'll be hyphenated. Day is just way too awesome to change.

MisterDoctor 12

Friday 16 December 2011 19:25

Leonidas?

alsgirl 24

Friday 13 January 2012 23:09

Oh dear

zzzmonkey 5

Saturday 28 January 2012 21:37

What's ur lasts name

C0N71NG3NCY 6

Tuesday 13 March 2012 19:13

Oh don't exaggerate, I don't think she's so stupid as to have really married you for that reason. She's probably just being funny!

MoarPretzel4Boiz 7

Thursday 15 March 2012 20:16

Let me guess: Your last name is Reefer. Or DeFelix. Or maybe...Dominico? I dunno.

TayCheyBacon 5

Thursday 3 October 2013 4:04

My husband's last name is Bacon...

drayloon 50

Tuesday 7 January 2014 6:06

My last name is Looney.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my father had a dream that he'd lost me forever, and the pain was so unbearable, it woke him up. Turns out, the pain he was experiencing was just his bowels and he really needed to take a shit. This is the most affection I've ever received from my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 031

You deserved it 3 461

Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 389

The Top

Today, my grandma added to my elephant collection by giving me some underwear with elephant ears on the hips, and a long, sock-like nose. She has no idea they're meant for a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 861

You deserved it 5 400

Today, my grandma gave me the 'abstinence' speech. I had thought she already left to go back to FL but then came into my room to tell me how proud she was of me to keep my virginity. I was doing it doggie-style with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 246

You deserved it 90 484

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 808

You deserved it 23 820

Today, during lunch break at work, the bitter departmental rivalry blew out of control, when one of the glorified thugs from HR started a fistfight with my shift supervisor. I rushed in to break it up, but only succeeded in getting sucker-punched into next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 014

You deserved it 3 444

Today, while taking pictures by the pool, my friend wanted to use my camera. I told her to put the wrist strap on so it wouldn't fall into the pool. She dropped the camera while trying to put the strap on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 868

You deserved it 5 540

Today, after spending at least 4 hours drawing a realistic shadow of a vampire for a picture contest, I finally remembered that vampires aren't supposed to produce shadows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 744

Same thing different taste

Bee in her bonnet

The patriarchy rules

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