Kids, Awkward and Work: What did you just say?

What did you just say?

By keeks_25 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 244

You deserved it 26 137

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

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Same thing different taste

Confused?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 177

You deserved it 35 895

Suave

By getmoneyab - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Mexico

Today, I went to Cheesecake Factory for dinner. There was a hot waiter who kept passing by. He saw me looking at him and I knew I had to say something. So when he approached my table I asked, "Excuse me, do you have any salt?" and he said, "I think it's right there on the table." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 924

You deserved it 68 494

Cheeky

By BurnedByAWaiter - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that, "It's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 599

You deserved it 8 453

By ISwearImNotOCD - 05/04/2017 08:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I found out that the chefs at my work can't spell for shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 153

You deserved it 371

Never do this, my dudes

By bluecollar - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, there was a luncheon at work in another dept. We all went to get some free food and see new faces. There was a hot girl walking around chatting. I grabbed my buddy's arm and told him there was a "nice pair of tits here." He saw her. She's his daughter. She's a new-hire… running HR. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 040

You deserved it 54 276

There was an attempt…

By JoshTheUnluckyFromKentucky - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Folsom

Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 650

You deserved it 2 923

The strangeness of strangers

By Hank Gummyworm - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was working the register at our local McDonald's. After a strange man left a massive order, he said, "Can I pay you in gummy worms?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 522

You deserved it 4 408

By thank u usa - 13/12/2013 22:20 - Germany

Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 084

You deserved it 3 569

By in this day and age.... - 19/10/2023 16:25 - United States - Dallas

Today, the first words I heard from my "good, Christian" future mother-in-law included a salvo of curse words and a hushed rant about "them dirty Jews". I'm culturally Jewish. This bodes well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 194

You deserved it 1 826

Brain worms

By smooth - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 880

You deserved it 19 107

tipsypiink 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 2:53

hahah did the parents leave a nice tip after that? (;

RyanRaygun 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 2:54

Most kids are little *****. Don't feel bad.

Comments

CurdledMilk 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 6:29

I agree with #6. Don't beat yourself up over it.

malikotako 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 11:59

LMAO! Just like Mean Girls with "grool".

sondramcfail 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 16:54

I'm actually laughing out loud... LOL.

manstie 1

Sunday 10 May 2009 17:17

oooooooooooooooommmmmmmfffffffffffffgggggggggggggggggggggg dude lol... i do feel sorry for you.

Kylaka 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 18:41

LMAO!!!! awwwwwwwww that's embarassing hun. :P

jessieshungry 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 21:07

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahaha

Turner81 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 22:10

That was Freakin Hilarius!!!! I would probably have done the same thing cause I get tongue tied too!!! I would have probably quit on the spot. LOL

comewinter 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 23:08

hahahaha I just peed myself a little

wanderingidiot 0

Monday 11 May 2009 22:17

LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! **** YEAH, THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!!

somaturee 0

Tuesday 12 May 2009 1:27

I actually snorted... Loudly. That's HILARIOUS!

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Cats Animals Gross Smells Love Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Painful Health First Dates Work Christmas Social Media Grieving Music Anniversary Boredom Ironic Intimacy Abuse Transportation Drunk AITA Alcohol Am I overreacting? Parents Kids Gun control

The Top

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 595

You deserved it 3 438

Today, I went on a date with someone I've been talking to online for weeks. Unfortunately, it turns out they'd used old photos and misrepresented themselves, and I didn't find them attractive at all. Even I'm not that desperate. We ended up having an awkward dinner and I couldn't wait for it to be over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 737

You deserved it 202

The Top

Today, I received a call offering me a job with the census bureau. I applied for this job 6 months ago while I was still fighting tooth and nail to stay where I was. Since I didn't get the job, I was evicted from my apartment, got on public assistance, and moved from North Carolina to Florida with my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 700

You deserved it 2 549

Today, I went on a blind date for coffee. He was smart, good looking, and friendly. While we were talking about our respective families it became abundantly clear that I have heard these stories before. I realized that 6 months earlier I had been dumped by his brother after sleeping with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 980

You deserved it 34 348

Today, my best friend of 5 years, who I got feelings for, and who I spent endless time bending over backwards and going above and beyond for, once again rejected me. He got into a car accident and I stayed with him all night, only for some girl he never even told me about to come and introduce herself as his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 812

Today, my husband is trying to divorce me because I’m pregnant, even though I’ve been told all my adult life that I’m infertile. I’ve never even had a period. He’s blaming me for lying to him because he never wanted kids. He even tried to claim it must be another guy's baby. He’s an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 856

You deserved it 195

Today, I received a package at work. Thinking it was something I ordered, I opened it in front of my coworkers. It was a gift from my grandmother: a giant pink, “I Love My Grandson” T-shirt. The worst part? They insisted I put it on and take a picture to send to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 300

You deserved it 279

Today, I was at a friend's party and tried to lean casually against a wall while talking to someone. I missed the wall and ended up stumbling backwards into the punch bowl that was atop the coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 221

You deserved it 345

Same thing different taste

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