Covid

OP here. I didn’t actually install a pool. I was running a bath and my baby started screaming, so I went to soothe him and forgot about the bath. I need to replace the floors all through my house!

Going swimmingly

By Anonymous - 28/01/2021 18:03 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was excited to go to swim after a long time of not doing so because of Covid restrictions. After changing into my trunks and putting my goggles on, I jumped into the pool straight away, while still wearing my mask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 675

Highly relatable

By Rasta Pickles - 16/05/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, my boss insisted we need to "do team bonding" so the deal was we all go bowling. I couldn't give a shit if they live or die, so ended up telling them I had COVID, just so I couldn't attend. Stick me on a desert island on my own and I'm in Utopia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 649

Stay safe, wear a hazmat suit

By Davey Crocker - 23/04/2020 08:00

Today, my coworker volunteered me to drop laptops off at two sites outside our normal areas. I asked if they were safe from COVID-19. "I don't know, but you're young. You'll be okay," responded the man who's been working from home for weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 216

Long long long

By Anonymous - 21/10/2023 14:00

Today, I had to turn down a job offer that would have been perfect for me because post-Covid fatigue syndrome is kicking my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 602

You deserved it 252

Ongoing crisis

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 06:00

Today, I found out my dad got Covid after spending the weekend at home. All my classes have me doing final projects, and my dorm's internet is a dumpster fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 131

Family issues

By thanks bro - 05/03/2021 17:00 - United States

Today, my brother refused to bring his kids to a small family get together for my daughter’s birthday, due to his fear of Covid. Later, I saw online that he was at a huge party for his wife’s family, no masks in sight. When I confronted him, he blocked me and won’t return my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 204

You deserved it 141

Love in the time of Covid

By moving out now - 27/09/2023 14:00

Today, my germophobic girlfriend has tested positive for Covid, and is utterly convinced she's going to die. She's been crying in the bed for the last five hours, talking about how much she regrets her choices, and how she never should have spent her last year with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 119

Clusterfuck

By WhyEvenBother - 16/12/2021 04:59 - Germany

Today, I just learned that instead of celebrating my birthday as a small group, my mother has invited dozens of family members from all over the Germany, amidst spiking Covid cases in my region. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 190

Social distancing is a thing

By Anonymous - 05/01/2022 19:58 - Germany

Today, I met a guy at a bar. Went home, got condoms, had sex. Also got Covid. First one night stand in four years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 1 632

Lockdown boredom

By Anonymous - 20/12/2020 02:08 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, thanks to 10 months of lockdown, the most intimate thing I have done on a Saturday night during this time is use a hobby knife to cut 1/4" thick calluses off my feet. I don't even walk anywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 189

Happy Holidays!

By Anonymous - 23/12/2023 06:00 - Canada - Burlington

Today, I have a 20-page essay due at 11. I'm only at 6 pages. I couldn't do it last week because of final exams. Got COVID on Monday (tested positive on Tuesday), so I was out of commission for three days. Now I won't even be able to see my families for Christmas. Fuck university. I'm so tired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 418

Merry Christmas, or not

By Anonymous - 23/12/2020 05:02

Today, I got a quick COVID test and got a positive result. Christmas is in 3 days, my son and husband have to stay with my mom and Christmas is my favorite holiday. I've never been away from them this long and it is killing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 1 456

Tonight, on Grey's Anatomy…

By ygrowup2fast - 23/04/2020 17:00

Today, my wife wasn't feeling well. She called her doctor, who isn't seeing patients due to COVID. Had to take her to the ER. After numerous tests, they told her that her potassium levels were low. Diagnosis: eat a banana. When we get the bill(s) from the hospital, this will be the most expensive banana ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 991

You deserved it 292

When you're accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression

By Anonymous - 04/01/2022 08:01

Today, again, I listened to dozens of people continue to whine about how pandemic restrictions are the hardest thing ever while continuing to battle the chronic illnesses, loss of family, underemployment, trauma, and ensuing depression I've struggled with, largely in secret, for the last 15+ years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 971

You deserved it 304

Sleeping on the kitchen floor

By Covid_countdown - 25/08/2022 12:00

Today, my fiancée and I slept in separate rooms, even though we're now considered married based on a Congolese ceremony we had, because I got Covid. We will have two bedrooms in our next place, but the lease starts next month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 619

You deserved it 193

Social distancing gone wrong

By bananapie69 - 10/04/2020 20:00

Today, waiting in the deli line at the store, a woman stood directly next to me. I panicked and tried to move back to get a 6-foot distance, but in my panic I didn’t realize there was a stand behind me. I almost fell over, so I gasped super loud. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 441

You deserved it 755

Covid-19 vs. Sex life

By CoronaDating - 23/03/2020 23:10

Today, I've been single for a couple of months. The last time I was single, Tinder and dating apps didn't exist. After figuring out how to be successful with those and setting up several dates, I've already had 3 date cancellations for this week because of the coronavirus. It's going to be a long couple of months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 459

You deserved it 455

Keywords

Cats Poopoo peepee Gross Animals Smells Awkward Love Miscellaneous Embarrassing Painful Health First Dates Work Christmas Music Social Media Grieving Anniversary Boredom Abuse Intimacy Ironic Drunk Transportation Alcohol Am I overreacting? AITA Parents Kids Gun control

The Top

Today, I hung out with some old friends for the first time since losing about 50 pounds, going from clinically obese to a healthy weight. I even bought a cute new dress for the occasion to show off my new body. No one noticed the change. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 784

You deserved it 2 422

Today, I woke up with a hangover and my girlfriend seemed pissed at me. It took me a while before I remembered having sex the night before. I just didn't know exactly what had happened after that had pissed her off. Then I realized nothing happened, because I fell asleep while she was on top of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 672

You deserved it 39 757

The Top

Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 026

You deserved it 5 862

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 568

You deserved it 52 863

Today, I had to blast music, turn the lights on, and physically drag my 29 year-old girlfriend out of bed to wake her up. All the while, she verbally abused me. This is the only way to wake her up, and if I don't do it, she will sleep through the day and then scream at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 151

You deserved it 513

Today, my twelve year-old son thought it would be a good idea to relentlessly shoot the mail truck with a paintball gun in front of all the neighbors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 138

You deserved it 9 729

Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. Out of nowhere, a huge, apparently suicidal bird dove into the windshield, putting a crack in it. My father yelled at me as if it was my fault, and is demanding I pay for the repairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 138

You deserved it 3 849

Today, my 175-pound rottweiler I've raised since a puppy watched me get jumped and robbed of my phone and money in my yard. An hour later, he hopped the fence and chased the mail man down the street after he leaned on the fence for a second. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 419

You deserved it 5 317