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By NoHappyEndings - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Dundalk

Today, it's been four weeks since I got a job offer after months of grueling interviews. I turned down other offers to accept the job, but I'm still unemployed because no one at the company will take my calls about my official start date. I've been ghosted by a corporate office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 213

You deserved it 428

A shadow of my former self

By NurseIAm - 04/04/2025 06:00 - United States - Belchertown

Today, I interviewed at a hospital and shadowed on the unit. Within two hours, I had been splashed with blood, and witnessed a young patient abruptly die, imprinting a horrible memory. Traumatized, and not even selected for hire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 144

Hazing ritual

By newguy - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it's my third day at work and the hazing finally began. After a few rounds of "punch the new guy", I thought I would finally be safe because the manager walked into the kitchen. He saw what was going on, picked up a handful of ketchup packets, and began throwing them at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 557

You deserved it 4 876

Hold the line

By Anonymous - 03/04/2025 12:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I was at a restaurant for a quite important business lunch. I really had to go to the bathroom, but there was a queue to the only stall in the whole place, so I decided to just "hold it" and power through. Half an hour later, I sneezed and… didn’t exactly hold it in anymore. I had to excuse myself and leave the restaurant early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 264

You deserved it 267

It's about control

By i hate it here - 03/04/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, after three years of letting everyone work remotely and do our thing, my company suddenly demanded everyone return to the office. Now I get sit in traffic for two hours every day just to join Zoom calls from a cubicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 110

Overload

By Anonymous - 03/04/2025 06:00 - Philippines - Addition Hills

Today, I was supposed to have a therapy session for my anxiety about work, but it got cancelled. My boss has been berating me for 2 weeks about my performance as a newbie. I feel like she doesn't like me and it's messing with my work even more. I'm dreading going to work tomorrow with the same problem. I can't get fired again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 132

Out of the frying pan into another frying pan

By Rizuki_Tsurai - 02/04/2025 06:00 - Philippines - Addition Hills

Today, after I got fired from my job last year because I couldn't handle the pressure of being under a PIP by a company who wants to underhandedly cut off employees, I got a new job. My new boss keeps hounding me about my performance and I feel like she doesn't like me. I live alone, have no savings and I can't afford being fired again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 121

Still a suspect

By UsernameNotFound404 - 01/04/2025 00:00 - Czechia

Today, I woke up, made breakfast for myself, and read all the notifications on my smartphone. The first one was about an accidental death at work, and that all maintenance workers are suspects. I work in maintenance, and it's not my section where the accident happened. RIP. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 54

Can't be arsed

By Anonymous - 31/03/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband turned down a six figure job offer because he thinks it will be too difficult to learn to speak German. German is my native language, he already speaks some German from being married to me for 16 years, but somehow becoming fully fluent isn’t worth 6 figures to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 110

Welcome to the machine

By Lol - 31/03/2025 20:00 - United States - Austin

Today, after I spent the last year working overtime to prove myself at my tech job, I got an email saying I was laid off due to “strategic restructuring.” My boss posted a vacation picture right after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 79

Time to unionize

By Anonymous - 31/03/2025 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, when our boss told us he was giving himself the same raise as everyone else was getting, we thought he was finally being a decent human being. Nope. He meant it literally. His raise to himself is the same amount as the other 12 employees' raises combined. His raise is 12x what ours is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 70

Evening out

By Pissed and broke - 30/03/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I finally got a raise after years of hard work! Excited, I went on a shopping spree, but as I checked the latest prices, it turns out that my extra income barely covers the increase in my grocery bill. Thanks, inflation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 119

Team building

By Anonymous - 30/03/2025 09:00 - Belgium - Merendree

Today, it was my last day at my current job after a year and a half and the end of my contract. I brought snacks and a gift for the office. Nobody even bothered to come say goodbye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 485

You deserved it 103

My big day

By ReadyFreddy - 29/03/2025 04:00 - United States - North Hollywood

Today, I was starting a new job. I got up early, showered, did my hair, put on my uniform, had a good cry because I was scared/excited that I was starting a future where I will be financially free for the first time. Then my boss texted me because one of his back of house employees is sick and he can’t train me until tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 87

One lonely Stanley cup

By Anonymous - 29/03/2025 10:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, my kids refused to wake up on time, and I was at least 30-45 minutes late to work. Oh, and I forgot to bring my coffee to work. The travel thermos is still sitting on the kitchen counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 341

Meritocracy is real?

By Anonymous - 28/03/2025 07:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, our assistant principal (of the elementary section) proposed a plan in which he would also take over our pre-school division. He's a totally unqualified teacher, but he got his position through cronyism. Now, he'll try to destroy my division as well, through his incompetence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 57

Good start

By Anonymous - 27/03/2025 15:00 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, our new co-worker started her job as member of our customer service team. It took some time to find someone good, so we were very happy to have her. After a few hours of explanation, it was time for her to log into her account with her work e-mail. Then she asked how our company name was written. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 113

It's my passion

By Anonymous - 26/03/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I sent a Whatsapp message to my boss that was meant for my coworker. It said, “I’m so over this job, I can’t wait to quit!” I tried deleting it immediately, but the notification pinged right as he was sitting next to me in a meeting. He smirked and said, “Good to know you’re so passionate about this job.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 66

You deserved it 602

Stolen valor

By ImpsonFamily - 26/03/2025 08:00 - Australia

Today, a manager was credited for coming up with a safety idea. This is the same idea I brought up weeks prior and was told it was silly by said manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 71

Hyperloop

By disfordiploma - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that I'm failing this semester because I've missed too many classes. I've missed the classes because I've been having panic attacks, a symptom of my anxiety disorder. I got the anxiety disorder because I was so afraid of failing school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108 664

You deserved it 28 528

He giveth and he taketh away

By Anonymous - 23/03/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, someone at work left 10 unopened beers after hours. I’m not much of a drinker, but free is free, so I took them home during my lunch break. After work, I left my new phone on top of my car, forgot about it, drove off, and it smashed in the middle of the road. Looks like I’m drinking those beers tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 535

Same thing

By fuckel4 - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - El Dorado

Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 791

You deserved it 5 561

Meritocracy, huh?

By Anonymous - 21/03/2025 19:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, as a teacher, I saw a younger boy kick an older boy in the crotch and I reported it in our online system. Despite typical consequences for violence (automatic suspension), the department head, a drinking buddy of the boy's parents, gave him only a single detention. Now, the department head is harassing me for reporting the incident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 86

America! **** yeah!

By Contractor - 20/03/2025 03:00 - United States - Charlotte

Today, and for the past week, I've come to accept that my dad's business is failing. He's used to hiring people willing to work for little pay from a street corner, and now those guys have all but vanished. No "real" Americans want to work for him, even for minimum wage. This country is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 877

Deviated septum blues

By Trent - 19/03/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I had a nosebleed at work after having recent surgery. As I was walking to the bathroom, I tripped and fell, sending blood splattering everywhere. My manager, who was walking by, looked at me and said, “You’re really committed to the bit.” I was too embarrassed to respond. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 68

Stuck

By Fackwork - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Council Bluffs

Today, after declining an amazing job offer that pays more than double what I make now in order to accept a promotion my boss offered me if I stayed, I asked when I would receive the promotion and pay raise. She snorted and said, "You thought I was serious about that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 687

You deserved it 10 336

Nothing for money

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boss told me I was fired 3 weeks ago because there's no money to pay me, meaning that I worked the last three weeks for free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 848

You deserved it 3 114

Hazy day

By Laurence - 18/03/2025 22:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my alarm went off, and in my half-asleep state, I grabbed my phone and snoozed it. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd actually snoozed my work email notification for the same amount of time, and my boss was emailing me every five minutes, asking where I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 407

Corner cutting

By Anonymous - 17/03/2025 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got some lumber delivered to site and that shit was so bent and warped I could've cut it into foot long pieces and sold them as boomerangs. My boss is breathing down my neck about finishing on time to a high standard of work, yet he keeps buying subpar materials on the cheap. Tosser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 52

Good intention, mid outcome

By Britany - 16/03/2025 18:00 - United States

Today, I was trying to rescue a stray dog and used my work ID to lasso him. I scooped him up and was carrying him to my car when something spooked him and he ran off with my work ID. I eventually found him and traded him a granola bar for my work ID, but not before I reported it missing to my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 453

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The Top

Today, I’ve been so stressed out lately about my health and mounting bills that my insomnia has returned with vengeance. I thought I’d masturbate to help get some relief, but turns out I’m too tired to even do the deed. Too exhausted to release, but my brain still won’t let me sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 087

You deserved it 175

Today, I found out why I’ve been covering most of the bills and the rent. Turns out my boyfriend is paying a very expensive OnlyFans subscription for his female bestie. When I confronted him about it, he responded by yelling, “It’s not like that!” and punched our glass patio door, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 653

You deserved it 253

The Top

Today, in an attempt to flirt with a cute guy in art class I barely know, I put on his sweater while he was in the bathroom. He came back just in time to see me spill white paint all over it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 1 656

Today, after 9 years of loveless marriage, my wife confided in me that she was always an introvert and depressed person, but pretended to be outgoing and fun loving with me up until our marriage, so she could marry me just to lift herself up from low class to high class society. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 336

You deserved it 131

Today, my dad yelled for me. It was an emergency. I ran down the stairs, tripped, fell, and limped over to my dad only to find that he wanted me to see a video of someone playing "Bohemian Rhapsody" on the ukulele. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 382

You deserved it 3 196

Today, as I was getting dressed after having sex with a guy I like, he told me I looked better with my clothes on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 426

You deserved it 5 616

Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 611

You deserved it 17 442

Today, I earned the nickname of "Harry Potter" for all the wrong reasons. I got locked in a storage cupboard for most of my shift, and couldn't get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 222

You deserved it 1 457