Work

By zoosmell pooplord - 02/09/2012 19:41 - Norway - Geilo

Today, my boss got angry at me because my English is better than his. He accused me of trying to steal his management position, and implied that I'll be lucky if I still have a job by the end of the month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 002

You deserved it 1 747

Mega creep

By Anonymous - 30/12/2019 18:00

Today, I met a new guy at work who wouldn't stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six-hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me that he was her husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 287

You deserved it 218

Narcissist

By Jesica Mcgee - 29/10/2020 18:02 - United States - Ferndale

Today, I got a job, a good job with benefits, a 401(k), and took a lot of work to get this: background check, drug testing, being qualified and I need to pay bills. I can't even be happy because my husband got demoted. It's all about him, and fuck my hard work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 403

You deserved it 153

By ihatepizza - 21/12/2016 22:49 - United States - Aurora

Today, as a delivery driver, I have been stiffed in tips by three separate people because "a delivery fee is a tip, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 175

You deserved it 1 089

RIP it up and start again

By A girl - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, it has been 8 months since I started a photography project in which I would take a picture of the same tree every day for a year. I just heard a noise outside. They cut the tree down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 285

You deserved it 4 648

By dine and DASH our friendship - 02/05/2017 00:11

Today, I served my good friend and his girlfriend at the restaurant where I work. They did a "dine and dash". FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 424

You deserved it 415

Sore loser

By Anonymous - 10/01/2021 15:01 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, after graduating from the same program, I was offered several jobs, while my boyfriend wasn’t. He couldn’t be happy for me, saying, "She got in with the right people, and they just keep handing her jobs," and dismissing my work ethic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 312

You deserved it 174

Time to call it quits

By Cooky - 14/03/2010 09:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I learnt that the people I work with dislike me so much that they have a competition to see who can accidentally hurt me the most. How did I find out? A chef poured boiling water over my hands, and another shouted "50 POINTS!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 469

You deserved it 6 739

Sorry mate, I didn't know

By Baboosh - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, was my first day as a bouncer. I was a bit late and didn't meet all the staff. Later that night, some fairly drunk guy was trying to force his way in, I told him we were at capacity and that he would have to wait. He kept trying and I ended up pushing him to the floor. He was the owner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 636

You deserved it 14 153

Freaked out

By m…… - 10/04/2022 00:00

Today, after I'd got into a steady routine for months, the new manager waltzed into the store out of the blue and began changing every single rule. I had a panic attack and cried, for which she promptly fired me for “acting like a baby.” I’m autistic and I don’t do well with sudden changes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 246

Yikes

By fashionista1787 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had a creepy old guy with awful body odor in my salon. As I was washing his hair, he brought up how he wants to start a garden, and how a woman's monthly flow weirdly helps to make it grow. Then he asked me if I could save up my used tampons for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 507

You deserved it 2 574

By Tigerninjagoalie - 20/06/2016 23:13 - United States - Tonawanda

Today, I finally found someone who liked me and wanted to kiss me. It was a 5-year-old at the daycare I work at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 683

You deserved it 1 047

Jorts it is

By pantless - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was written up for being late to work. I was late because somebody in my dorm stole my pants. All of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 840

You deserved it 1 316

By cwl727 - 09/04/2014 16:49 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a customer threw his hot coffee all over me, because it was taking "too long" for their credit card to be approved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 112

You deserved it 3 236

cwl727 tells us more.

cwl727 32

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:42

So I am doing a follow up on this because for some reason a different name was put as the author, I have contacted FML about it. This happened about 2 years ago when I worked at a theme park in Orlando. The guy was buying tickets and I told him that the computer told me I had to call the credit card company. I asked if he wanted me to use a different card and he said no and was fine with me calling to get authorization. I was on hold with the company and it was taking too long for him. He started complaining and I told him I was on hold but instead of calming down he threw his coffee on me. It was not scorching hot but it was hot enough that it did burn a bit. Security came over and escorted him off the premises and he is now banned from the entire company's property. I didn't sue in fact it was just another story to tell my friends and family.

Time flies

By Anonymous - 07/05/2024 15:00 - United States - Normal

Today, I had a mental breakdown because I have a 10,000 word final project due on Monday and I have only 800 words written so far, because I have been working on other classes and trying to be outside with my friends in the nice weather this week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139

You deserved it 894

By urinetrouble - 04/05/2017 06:00 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, while checking the men's bathroom at work, I noticed one of the air fresheners had fallen from the top of the paper towel holder into the garbage. It wasn't until I picked it up and examined it that I realized I was actually holding used urinal fresheners. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 451

You deserved it 1 608

Taking the piss

By Mug - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boss made me work a longer shift than usual. Not because he needed me in, but just so I'd finish at the same time as his brat of a son, and give him a lift home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 273

You deserved it 2 243

Exploitation

By Anonymous - 20/12/2021 17:01

Today, after trying so hard to get myself back on my feet, I had an amazing interview and I was hired on the spot. I was so happy, until I read the position I was given, and it turns out I didn't get full-time, I got barely enough hours to even be part-time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 194

Healthcare for all

By Jill_Free_Woods - 19/07/2022 22:00

Today, I was sitting down to do my homework when I severely sprained my ankle. I live on the third floor and can’t walk far without severe pain, and I'm broke, so a compression bandage is out of the question. I can’t wait until the first of the month when I get paid again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 152

By Dominic - 14/06/2009 19:14 - Canada

Today, as a prank, my friends put a big bucket of water on my door so that it would spill on me as I exited my room. It would have been funny if I hadn't been holding my $900 laptop as I was walking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 808

You deserved it 3 111

By Anonymous - 10/08/2019 02:00 - Germany - Wuppertal

Today, my coworker keeps loudly saying things like, "Oh, now THIS!" If I don't ask, "What?" she pouts. If I do ask, she tells me, at length and with very bad grammar, how every one of our colleagues and partners is either stupid, rude or out to get her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 634

You deserved it 185

Drifting like a ship with no captain

By stuckass - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Pakistan

Today, our office had a mock audit before the real thing. I got warning note for not maintaining proper databases for last year's activities. I only joined a few months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 452

You deserved it 1 600

By Tooks - 28/07/2009 19:41 - United Kingdom

Today, everyone at work commented on how much better my new haircut looked and how I should keep styling it this way as it's such an improvement over my old style. I was late for work this morning. My new hair style was Bed hair that I didn't have time to sort out... FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 814

You deserved it 8 057

Something rotten

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, the gas company had to be called into work for a possible gas leak. The pipes are fine. I had White Castle for dinner last night. I'm the gas leak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 139

You deserved it 1 438

By Girl w/ the Pearl Earring - 22/08/2016 11:46 - Australia - Perth

Today, it was another stressful day of watching servicemen at my job trying to figure out what broke an extremely expensive and essential machine. I'm just waiting for the day they finally discover the earring I dropped into it about a week ago FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 186

You deserved it 5 041

Freaked out

By anomynous - 05/04/2021 05:00

Today, my workplace replaced all of the toilets in the store with automatic toilets. I have an anxiety disorder, and I can't use them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 393

Did I stutter?

By Ally - 20/05/2022 14:00

Today, I had a job interview. I have a speech impediment and as much as I tried to keep it under control, it came out during the interview. I could tell the interviewers were trying to hold in their laughter. They ended the interview after 5 agonizing minutes, saying they’ll contact me. I left in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 209

You deserved it 106

By yolo is for shitheads - 09/10/2012 16:07 - United States

Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 461

You deserved it 2 171

Don't interrupt me

By Bad Teacher - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Australia - West End

Today, I got sent to the head teacher's office for doing "stupid hand gestures and disrupting the class". Yesterday my teacher had told the class to do the same hand gesture to ask for permission to go to the toilet so it wouldn't interrupt her talking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 370

You deserved it 3 370

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The Top

The Top

Today, I'm in the process of adopting a child. When I called my mom to tell her the news, she just said, "Oh honey, don't adopt, it's the worst decision you'll ever make." I'm adopted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 199

You deserved it 3 385

Today, I recently broke up with a girl I care greatly about to spare her having to deal with my mental health issues. Facebook keeps updating me with everything she does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 679

You deserved it 867

Today, I asked my 10 year-old guitar student why Good Friday is a holiday. He answered, "We remember Jesus Christ's crucifixion. Isn't it sad to kind of celebrate someone's death? Well, I don't care, I just enjoy the free holiday and I don't believe in magic anyway!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 558

Today, I walked into my room in only a towel. I walked in front of my brother to get to my computer. He said, "My webcam is on." I replied smartly by screaming, hugging the towel tightly to me, turning, and running straight into the glass door, dropping the towel. His friends saw and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 718

You deserved it 15 594

Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 362

You deserved it 4 192

Today, I introduced my family to beerpong. They especially liked the part about distracting each other while shooting. My grandma flashed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 857

You deserved it 11 916