Love and Intimacy: Aaand blocked.

Aaand blocked.

By wtf fml - 20/03/2018 17:30 - United States - Hesperia

Today, I was mourning the recent loss of a close family member. My ex's idea of comforting me was to ask if he could come over so I could “give him some bomb ass head” to take my mind off things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 434

You deserved it 511

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/07/2013 16:13 - Lithuania - Vilnius

Today, I poured my heart out to my now ex-girlfriend over the recent passing away of my grandmother. Her eyes glazed over multiple times, and when I said that I don't know how to cope with everything, her advice was simply, "Shotgun. Mouth. Blam." FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 308

You deserved it 5 215

By SadPuppy - 22/05/2013 07:14 - United States

Today, while grieving over the loss of my Grandpa, I called my girlfriend for comfort. After I had cheered up, she said, "Don't worry, he went to Hell anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 831

You deserved it 3 549

With friends like these…

By Anonymous - 19/11/2022 06:00 - United States

Today, my ex hit me up out of the blue, so I texted our mutual friend to tell them what had happened. The friend then told my ex and he got mad, ending with him texting me, “Pop quiz: When’s the last time you took a shower?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 588

You deserved it 245

Please leave

By Yada yada yada - 28/08/2024 22:00 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, my neighbor knocked on my door to borrow some tools. Trying to be friendly, I asked how he was doing. He then spent the next 45 minutes describing his recent breakup in excruciating detail. I just wanted him to take the tools and leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 161

By Anonymous - 12/03/2013 18:40 - Canada - London

Today, I told my mom about the rough time I'm having over my recent break-up, and how I can't help thinking about my ex every single day. Her attempt to console me involved saying, "Pft. I bet he doesn't think about you every day" and walking away. Thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 459

You deserved it 6 256

He's a keeper

By Anonymous - 11/01/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I got the news that my ex-boyfriend from two years ago died in a car crash. My fiancé found me crying in the living room when he came home from work. When he found out why I was inconsolable, he said, "Make sure you say hi to that abusive turd in hell for me, thanks for everything." He is now staying at a hotel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 855

You deserved it 1 600

From beyond the grave

By Anonymous - 26/06/2024 23:00 - United Kingdom - Swindon

Today, I realised that my powers of disappointment had reached a new low when my ex sent me a message saying that our friend who passed away two years ago would be very upset with me for how I'm "behaving." So upset that it's also upsetting my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 355

You deserved it 111

A friend in need…

By anonymous - 30/06/2012 06:26 - United States - Denver

Today, I was going through a hard and painful break up after a long relationship. Trying to get over it, I invited my two best friends over to lift my spirits. The night ended with them making out on my bed as I sat alone in the other room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 199

You deserved it 2 535

I'm an empath

By Anonymous - 12/12/2022 08:00 - United Kingdom - Amersham

Today, my ex of three years wanted me to comfort him because his new girlfriend broke up with him as well. And what do I do? I help him, I don’t fucking know why, and now he won’t leave me alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 1 212

This is fine

By Anonymous - 07/08/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 86

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Wednesday 21 March 2018 1:40

I can see why he's your ex.

Hellblazer_Sith 25

Wednesday 21 March 2018 1:56

I am so glad he is your ex. Sorry for your loss OP.

Comments

interesting33 36

Wednesday 21 March 2018 8:18

was he your ex when he said it?

Lobby_Bee 17

Wednesday 21 March 2018 8:18

Keeping your mind off of your recently deceased family member and putting it on his dick is not a very good suggestion.

cornyrob 33

Wednesday 21 March 2018 13:08

OP, do you actually listen to what you tell him while you're doing that? I bet it's all "Babe, i love doing this for you. Whenever you want, just ask. It'll make my day."

Rabite 28

Wednesday 21 March 2018 13:39

It's quite hard to talk with a dick in your mouth, you know. You should try it some time. Or a double handjob so that you don't write stupid stuff like this on the internet.

Aiden89 23

Wednesday 21 March 2018 14:58

What a dick move.

Linden Harris 5

Wednesday 21 March 2018 18:30

To be fair, there was a chance no matter how small that chance is, that that was exactly what you wanted. joking aside, chin up n I'm sorry for your loss

ARISKomuniszt 24

Wednesday 21 March 2018 18:59

This is the fault of capitalism. The manifestation of power as a variable (for example - money), means that humans develop instincts to be naturally individualistic so as to not fall on the social ladder. This led to your ex instinctually (and abhorrently) prioritising his own desires.

Huldan MeGroyn 13

Wednesday 21 March 2018 20:05

"What you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."