Birthday blues

By omaha24 - 29/04/2020 02:00

Today, my loneliness pushed me to buy a pack of cigarettes just so I had to show my ID to the clerk, hoping he would wish me a happy birthday. I don't even smoke and he didn't say anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 600

You deserved it 563

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Same thing different taste

By Joe - 04/08/2011 18:28 - United States

Today, I asked a guy if he could buy me a pack of cigarettes, since I'm still under 18. He took my money, went into the supermarket, and must have slipped out a side-entrance, because he never came back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 803

You deserved it 126 086

By LizzyJones - 20/08/2013 17:38 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, my husband bought me a present for our three year anniversary. It was a pack of 20 cigarettes. I don't smoke. He does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 185

You deserved it 8 986

Proof

By 30goingon13 - 23/10/2021 23:00

Today, my acne was so bad I got carded for a pack of lighters. I'm 30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 829

You deserved it 111

Happy…

By Anonymous - 01/12/2010 23:02 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. My parents got me a box of cupcakes. My brother got me a deck of cards. My aunt got me a brochure on how to quit smoking. I have diabetes, I don't play cards, and I don't smoke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 383

You deserved it 3 557

By IDPlease - 07/12/2018 03:00

Today my job started requiring all transactions regarding cigarettes or alcohol to have the ID scanned before proceeding. There is no way yo bypass this function. I carded a 60 year old man and his 40 year old son who both yelled at me for 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 948

You deserved it 185

By Misky - 02/07/2012 02:51

Today, I was walking past a homeless guy while smoking; he asked if he could have a cigarette. So I gave him one and said without thinking, "Sorry, it’s a menthol, but beggars can't be choosers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 596

You deserved it 28 463

Generous

By cAtaLanbLoOd - 24/10/2013 06:06 - France - Perpignan

Today, a homeless guy asked me for a cigarette. Knowing that I only had a couple left in my pack, I gave it to him. He opened it, took one out and thanked me profusely. A bit surprised, I went on my way. Oh yeah, that's right, the pack contained the money I'd withdrawn from an ATM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 128

You deserved it 51 639

By Jims - 29/04/2011 14:00 - Singapore

Today, the only person who wished me a happy birthday is the policeman who checked my identity card for being "suspiciously gangster-like". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 463

You deserved it 5 765

Unreasonable

By Dano - 07/08/2021 10:01

Today, I was fired from my job for not buying a pack of cigarettes for my boss. I only lasted two months in that junkyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865

You deserved it 87

By I-love-my-tea - 09/06/2015 22:30 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, I had to show my ID to prove I was over 18. I was buying teaspoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 115

You deserved it 2 009

kenken5 16

Wednesday 29 April 2020 4:54

To be fair, does anyone actually know what day it is these days?

KookieLove666 15

Wednesday 29 April 2020 3:21

happy birthday

Comments

KookieLove666 15

Wednesday 29 April 2020 3:21

happy birthday

Auburn_flame 8

Wednesday 29 April 2020 4:26

happy Birthday

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 29 April 2020 4:35

Smoking will reduce the number of birthdays you have to pull ridiculous attention-grabbing stunts like that.

arther 14

Wednesday 29 April 2020 11:23

OP said in her post that she doesn't smoke.

Seeya55 31

Wednesday 29 April 2020 16:46

Holy shit it's Mark Hamill!

kenken5 16

Wednesday 29 April 2020 4:54

To be fair, does anyone actually know what day it is these days?

bloopaloop 27

Wednesday 29 April 2020 5:24

Should have done that with a speeding ticket

mekiswrite 21

Wednesday 29 April 2020 20:40

Well, you know what they say; "smoke if you got 'em."

Gina Marie Lombardi 14

Wednesday 29 April 2020 20:41

Happy Birthday 🎉🎂🎁🎊🎈🥳

shepardkinz 19

Wednesday 29 April 2020 21:09

Happy birthday, OP!

breefearless 4

Wednesday 29 April 2020 21:19

happy belated bday

Snailfarts 27

Wednesday 29 April 2020 21:45

you could have bought a lottery ticket..

Keywords

Awkward Embarrassing Miscellaneous Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Zoom

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I agree, your life sucks 2 273

You deserved it 1 363

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Today, I rear-ended someone while trying to watch my odometer hit 80,000 miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 589

You deserved it 7 396

Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 737

You deserved it 2 825

Today, an ex of mine told me she wanted a threesome. This was great until I realised I wasn't included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 317

You deserved it 453

Today, I was instructed to tell my niece a bedtime story, so I made up a story where they come down to Earth and steal all the ice cream. Suddenly, she burst into tears and ran to her mom, screaming, "The aliens are coming! Save the ice cream!" Now, I'm banned from bedtime storytelling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 218

Today, I had two surprises for my boyfriend who was at work. One was a dessert and the other was sexy lingerie. He chose the dessert. Then told me I was an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 501

You deserved it 5 107

Today, my mom was proud for making a positive change in her life. The change in question? She now throws away the smelly hair she combs out of the dog, instead of keeping it for unspecified later use. FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 62