Break time - FML

Break time

By Samantha K - 19/10/2020 20:08

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he stopped and got dressed. Naked and confused, I figured he’d be right back. Yeah, 20 minutes later with a plate of food for himself. So much for sex. It would've been nice if he told me though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 606

You deserved it 207

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Same thing different taste

By cmore - 11/03/2010 01:10 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 055

You deserved it 5 650

Kinky

By sandwichsex - 08/08/2009 22:39 - United States

Spicy

Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 182

You deserved it 12 019

Hello everyone!

By Anonymous - 18/04/2020 08:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were sexting, and he asked me if I would be naked and waiting for him when he got home. When he told me he was on his way, I took my clothes off and got into bed. What he didn’t tell me was he was bringing friends to pick up a desk from our place for their office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 085

You deserved it 373

By liz1234 - 23/03/2009 00:11 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. His mom called to him from the next room telling him dinner would be ready soon, he needed to move his car, etc. They had a 5 minute conversation...while he was still inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 215

You deserved it 8 137

By Patricia - 01/10/2011 23:30 - United States

Spicy

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home, he was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 567

You deserved it 5 721

Hard to believe

By Anonymous - 02/01/2020 18:00

Spicy

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 375

You deserved it 579

By notsohot - 25/08/2019 00:01

Spicy

Today, I showed up at my boyfriend's house with nothing under my coat but some sexy lingerie. He told me he was working on an assignment, and made me wait three hours before he'd have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 329

You deserved it 2 300

By Anonymous - 04/06/2015 12:26 - United States - San Bruno

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend I was horny and was waiting for him at my place. 30 minutes later, he still hadn't arrived, so I called him and asked if he was coming. He replied "Already did, right into a kleenex." and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 538

You deserved it 4 447

Actor's Studio

By darthmilfious - 31/03/2010 07:56 - France

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 684

You deserved it 69 138

By fuckadaisical - 06/12/2013 20:23 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 435

You deserved it 8 901

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 19 October 2020 20:53

You know, sometimes enough is enough and you just want something to eat. Pretty thoughtless not to offer you any food.

genuinegoodguy 9

Monday 19 October 2020 23:42

You mean ex boyfriend?

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 19 October 2020 20:53

You know, sometimes enough is enough and you just want something to eat. Pretty thoughtless not to offer you any food.

Marcella1016 31

Tuesday 20 October 2020 2:48

To be fair, he could’ve gotten something to eat without even leaving the bed...

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 20 October 2020 4:32

You know, I thought I walked into that one after I hit Send. You proved me right!

Wadlaen 23

Monday 19 October 2020 22:43

Well, sometimes suddenly you get the munchies😅😋

genuinegoodguy 9

Monday 19 October 2020 23:42

You mean ex boyfriend?

tounces7 27

Tuesday 20 October 2020 3:00

I don't think it's quite appropriate to dump him for getting really drunk on the night of his 21st birthday.

Samantha K 9

Tuesday 20 October 2020 12:36

😂 I was thinking the same thing!

fjvitt 14

Tuesday 20 October 2020 4:25

Evidently, he was finished with it...

Samantha K 9

Tuesday 20 October 2020 12:38

Well next time let me know, so I’m not thinking we about to go back at it 🤦🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

jfigley 5

Tuesday 20 October 2020 14:36

Huh?! Thats strange as hell. I want to know his reason behind it...

Samantha K 9

Monday 26 October 2020 9:30

Me too 🤦🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

Bamisoep 9

Thursday 22 October 2020 9:58

We need some more info. A- was there penetration? (then he is just weird) B- what was on the plate?

Samantha K 9

Monday 26 October 2020 9:29

1. Yes there was penetration And..... 2. It was organic mini samosas

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Video games Gamers Ironic Zoom

The Top

Today, my husband decided to flash me while I was on a video call, so my clients announced they would only work with professionals, and ended the call. I was giving a virtual showing of a £1.2 million house they were thinking of buying. At 6% commission, my husband's junk just cost us £72,000. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 406

You deserved it 276

Today, after about a year of keeping it a secret from my girlfriend, I told her about my foot fetish. She said "EWWWWWWWW!" and left. She's ignoring my calls and has changed her relationship status to single on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 572

You deserved it 6 604

The Top

Today, I tried to sound like I had my life together by bragging to a friend about how I meal prep every week. In reality, I’m sitting here eating a cold slice of pizza for lunch that I found in the back of my fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54

You deserved it 526

Today, I went to a baseball game. It was windy, so I decided to get my hat from the car trunk. When I opened it and reached in, loose papers started flying everywhere. Panicked, my dad slammed the trunk shut on my fingers. Entering the stadium, I discovered it was free hat day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 062

You deserved it 5 713

Today, I sent a friend request on facebook to the only person I became friends with this semester at college. He denied me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 185

You deserved it 4 372

Today, I was at a band practice. The band was talking to each other with language like "cadence", "resolution" and "consecutive fifths". When they spoke to me, they used terms like "tick", "bong", "ticky bong"; and "bongy tick". Musically, I feel like a baboon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 483

You deserved it 6 820

Today, I wanted to bake some chocolate chip cookies. As the first load was done, I tasted a cookie and it tasted too salty. Thinking it was because of the pinch of salt, I added more sugar to the batter, only to realize that the sugar I've put into the whole batter was actually salt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 095

You deserved it 2 432

Today, I had the brilliant idea of jumping off a swing at its highest point. I can now add two things to my list of accomplishments: making out with a tree and breaking my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 560

You deserved it 1 434