Break-ups

It's a no from me, dawg

By Anonymous - 02/12/2024 15:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, the guy I’ve been seeing for a couple of months and started falling for told me his ex-girlfriend is pregnant with his child. I’m so bummed because kids and baby mamas are my number one deal-breaker. I really liked him too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 126

Hey big spender!

By Haley - 27/10/2024 21:00 - United States - Great Bend

Today, I opened some junk mail addressed to my fiancé and saw a credit letter about applying for a new mortgage. When I called to tell him his identity was stolen, he admitted he bought a house, and then broke up with me. I had no clue he was unhappy. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 127

Spineless

By Anonymous - 10/10/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I received a text from my boyfriend breaking up with me. Not only was this a bit cowardly but he'd also sent it in a reply to our last interaction on our phones, a group chat with some of our friends, who started commenting with sad face emojis before I had even had the chance to see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 71

Disconnected

By Chrissy - 08/10/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I was having a romantic dinner with my girlfriend when she said she had a confession. I expected something cute. Instead, she told me she’s been "reconnecting" with her ex for the past month... and wants to go back to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 525

You deserved it 56

I can't believe it's not better

By Anonymous - 04/10/2024 13:00 - United States - Leesburg

Today, I found out that my boyfriend (who is autistic just like me) was cheating on me. When I asked him why he would do this, considering he’s the type of guy who cannot stand being single, he said, and I quote, “I feel like I deserve better.” He’s now my ex, and is yet again complaining about being single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 103

Passive agressive on a whole new level

By Joe Bloggs - 30/09/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was at my usual coffee shop when I overheard a couple at the next table arguing about how to break up. They decided to have a “Breakup Party” and invited everyone around them, including me, right there and then. I ended up eating free cake while watching their weird, messy breakup unfold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 426

You deserved it 116

Bad breakup idea

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Switzerland - Wildberg

Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 306

You deserved it 4 452

Brave move

By Anonymous - 12/09/2024 14:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by sending a GIF. Not a sad one either. It was a GIF of some dude disappearing into thin air. Ten out of ten for originality, but come on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 73

I am a man

By FREEDOM - 09/09/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, I left my wife of 25 years. For every one of those years, I was treated like a stupid child or a worthless burden. When I finally got fed up, everyone said I was the bad guy. I just want to be treated like a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 149

That explains that

By Anonymous - 04/09/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I checked my ex's profile for the first time since we broke up a few months ago. He's dating a girl who's so pretty, and he looks so happy. He started dating her about 3 weeks after we broke up and when I broke up with him he wasn't upset at all. He had been ignoring me for weeks, and forgot our anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 367

You deserved it 262

Sounds like an FML commenter

By Megan M - 25/08/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 3 years cheated on me. I was extremely devastated, and was crying in my room. My mom told me that it’s not a reason to cry. Apparently, “There’s people out there without anything to eat, nowhere to live, and people dying of cancer - that’s a REAL reason to cry.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 579

You deserved it 144

Move on

By Anonymous - 23/08/2024 07:00 - United States - Puyallup

Today, it was my the last day of my time off work for my birthday weekend and I had so much fun, but I was thinking about my ex-fiancé for a lot of the time because I still haven’t gotten closure with that situation. All I wanna do is SCREAM because I just turned 30, got dumped and have to keep on going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 215

Leonardo syndrome

By Anonymous - 19/08/2024 14:00 - United States - Savannah

Today, my boyfriend, who is 10 years older than me, told me that he never wanted to get married and that he felt bad for wasting all of my time, and he just "doesn't want the responsibility of being in a relationship." After 12 years. I just found out he's dating a younger girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 94

What would you do?

By Anonymous - 02/08/2024 17:00 - United States - Tuscaloosa

Today, I found out my partner is cheating on me with several women. I broke up with him but he won’t move out without legal action (he is staying in my apartment), so I’m literally stuck being around him. He’s been very toxic and petty since I found out. I just want this to end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 621

You deserved it 129

Backstabber!

By Betrayed - 23/07/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, my friend, who is dating an ex of mine, posted a story on her Instagram of their dating history. Met in 2020; First Date: 2021; Became Official: 2022. I introduced them in 2020 and he broke up with the, “It’s not you it’s me” excuse in 2022. I feel like she put a dagger through my heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 96

NEXT!

By Anonymous - 14/07/2024 16:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because I got a haircut without asking for his permission first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 676

You deserved it 113

What a pity

By Anonymous - 03/07/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I realized I will never find love again. I broke down after I finally realized that no woman will love me like I used to be loved. I have not dated anyone for almost 10 years. I try to go on dates, to no avail. I will forever be alone and I will forever be tortured by my loneliness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 393

Class war

By gill - 20/06/2024 03:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Recently, her mother married a rich guy and they moved in together. Her stepfather pays for everything and she can now go to bars every weekend or travel. Now that she’s “had a taste of the good life” she thinks she can meet someone better. I’m working class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 615

You deserved it 92

We were on a break

By Depressed - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me that we should take a break from our relationship, because it'd be best for the both of us. Later, I found out that she really meant it'd be best for her and her new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 496

You deserved it 3 675

Alexa, play "Bet She's Not Your Girlfriend" by Pet Shop Boys

By Anonymous - 01/06/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend went back to her ex for the fourth time. I don’t know why I keep going back knowing that will happen, but… FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 818

Adding insult to injury

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. While he was dumping me, he was holding hands with his new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 015

You deserved it 3 141

Relationship goals

By Anonymous - 24/05/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, the woman I’ve loved, cared for, and nursed through cancer, left me for her ex since he wants to get married and I don’t. I didn’t know that a piece of paper and a white dress mean more than unconditional love and support. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472

You deserved it 537

Loving

By HeatherFeather - 23/05/2024 16:00 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, the guy I was seeing told me it wasn’t gonna work out and that he wished me the best. Apparently I acted “too desperate” for his liking. Gee, I’m sorry, but I guess showing basic decency like buying you a birthday present, buying you lunch everyday, and allowing you to use my Netflix, AKA being loving, is too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 560

Trust

By Anonymous - 22/05/2024 14:00 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that her ex cheated on her when they were together, so she pegged all men the same, saying she was done with relationships, and didn't care if she hurt me or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 589

You deserved it 87

Not taking it well

By runsinthefamily - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Aurora

Today, my neighbor called the cops on me, claiming I'd threatened him with a gun. Despite zero proof, they took me to the station and gave me hell. I guess what I've learned today is that you should never offend your crazy neighbor by breaking up with his daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 009

You deserved it 4 635

Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

By ReginaW - 14/03/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, my husband sat me down to tell me he’s filing for divorce as he’s fallen out of love with me and loves my 19 year-old daughter (his step-daughter). Furthermore, I’m off the lease when it expires next month so they can live together. We have a 2 month-old son. He replied, “OK, and? I’ll pay child support.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 865

You deserved it 112

Sabotage

By Anonymous - 21/02/2024 17:00 - United States - Harlingen

Today, my girlfriend’s friend decided she wanted to tell her that I was flirting with other girls, just so we would break up. It worked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 111

How could you?

By Anonymous - 18/02/2024 05:00

Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks found out she was 2 months pregnant with her ex's baby. I of course broke up with her because I don’t need exes drama or babies in my life. My mother called me an atrocious human being for not staying with her after only three weeks to raise another dude's kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 153

Intrusive "**** you" thoughts

By Anonymous - 09/02/2024 03:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I had the memory of an ex-friend pop up in my brain and I couldn't help but wonder how the little homewrecker is doing these days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 357

You deserved it 119

Effed around, found out

By Ryan - 06/02/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, the woman I left my wife for says she doesn’t wanna date me because she "sees me as a best friend” and “You just got divorced, it’s kinda awkward.” I caught feelings for this woman, tried to fight it for months and finally caved in, only to be told she sees me as a platonic friend. My wife won’t take me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 2 158

Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Cars ADHD Transportation Ironic Vacation Work Mental health Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Annoying Covid Health Kids Cute Shopping Coworkers Dogs Animals Photography Art Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

The Top

Today, my friend got a text showing his girlfriend cheating on him. Sounds like his FML, but he was at my house. He then worked his way through a bottle of my whisky and went into a drunken rage. He threw my furniture through windows, punched holes in the wall, and smashed stuff until I had to call the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 113

Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did I remembered there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper; he never did, and came out without socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 528

You deserved it 5 802

The Top

Today, my cat jumped on my chest while I was sleeping and head-butted my nose to show she loves me. It was hard enough to crack it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 117

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 804

You deserved it 1 741

Today, I had a doctor's appointment because I've recently lost weight. I'm already underweight, and I was concerned because the weight loss has been causing some other health concerns to worsen. My doctor's exact words of advice? "Eating food usually leads to weight gain." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 831

You deserved it 355

Today, my boyfriend sent me an article about how smelling farts can reduce dementia then added, "You're welcome." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 935

You deserved it 905

Today, I noticed some of my thongs were stretched out and now hung loose on my hips. I thought it might be the dryer set too hot but no, apparently my mom has been wearing them over her fat ass, and thought I wouldn’t mind since we occasionally share our hoodies. Not the same thing mom. GROSS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 268

You deserved it 126

Today, while studying pictures of a cadaver for an anatomy class, I found myself jealous of its thigh gap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 416

You deserved it 1 812