Love, Kids, Health, Poopoo peepee and Teenagers: Dumbass - FML

Dumbass

By Anonymous - 15/11/2023 06:00

Today, I talked to a teenage girl that came in for debilitating constipation. Turns out she'd stopped drinking water and had been purposely holding her bowels because her new online boyfriend convince her it’s unattractive and unladylike for girls to poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 698

You deserved it 96

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Same thing different taste

By firegirl - 05/07/2018 15:00

Today, I finally got over a long bout of constipation. I was scared to ask my mom for laxatives because I had the feeling she would tell all her friends, but on the 6th day of absolutely no bowel movements, I caved. I later overheard my mom telling all her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 916

You deserved it 373

By Anonymous - 17/11/2009 20:05 - United States

Today, I was at home with slight constipation, so I took two laxatives. That's when my boyfriend called me, saying his parents are in town and want to have dinner tonight, this being the first time I've met them. I've already been on the toilet five times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 561

You deserved it 5 933

Waterworld

By Anonymous - 25/11/2022 18:00

Today, I went to the doctor with serious digestive issues, only to be told off the bat that I just need to drink more water. She wasn’t interested to hear that 1) I already drink the recommended daily amount and 2) drinking when I don’t feel like it fucks up my system even worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 125

By shatMyself - 22/04/2013 19:10 - United States

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 478

You deserved it 3 422

By çapousse2904 - 12/09/2014 05:45 - France - Le Pr?-saint-gervais

Today, my girlfriend put her hand on my abs and confessed that she was glad I'd secretly started working out. I couldn't bring myself to admit that I've been constipated for three weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 167

You deserved it 4 059

Oversharing is caring

By Lauren - 12/10/2011 17:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my family. It was going well until my 23 year-old sister started telling him in detail about her constipation, and that if she doesn't take a shit in a few days, it's going to come out of her mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 465

You deserved it 2 866

By oh no - 22/06/2015 20:58 - United States - Vallejo

Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 485

You deserved it 5 288

Famous for something

By leaflady03 - 27/04/2021 00:30

Today, my mom won’t stop calling up all her friends and family and even telling complete strangers about my "bowel problems." Even at parties, she talks about my pooping habits every chance she gets. This isn’t what I want to be known for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 183

You deserved it 108

Too real

By ann - 05/06/2021 14:00

Today, my daughter complained that she no longer wanted to talk about poop, as it grosses her out. This is a girl who can eat a rare steak while watching a guy’s arms get hacked off on TV, but poop is where she draws the line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 853

Get out of my house

By EstefanP - 13/05/2022 14:00

Today, I walked in on my mother-in-law teaching my 11 year-old daughter how to purge herself using a toothbrush. Her logic is that, “If she gets fat, she’ll never get a boyfriend.” She sees nothing wrong, and bitched at me for messing with her future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 299

You deserved it 136

Next

Top comments

TomeDr 24

Wednesday 15 November 2023 11:57

I’m seeing this misconception more and more often. An ex of my daughter actually admitted to thinking that women didn’t poop. What on earth???

FluffythePink 21

Wednesday 15 November 2023 10:21

🤦

Comments

FluffythePink 21

Wednesday 15 November 2023 10:21

🤦

TomeDr 24

Wednesday 15 November 2023 11:57

I’m seeing this misconception more and more often. An ex of my daughter actually admitted to thinking that women didn’t poop. What on earth???

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Wednesday 15 November 2023 13:16

I'm pretty sure that there are websites dedicated to ladies pooping. Sounds like someone needs to be sent a link.

L0life29 6

Thursday 16 November 2023 21:46

and this is why civilization is going to end

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I agree, your life sucks 18 227

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I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 172

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I agree, your life sucks 2 691

You deserved it 352

Today, while working at a pizza shop near a college campus, I got an order to deliver to the dorms. Extremely busy at work and annoyed that someone wouldn't take 3 minutes to walk over, I spat on the pizza. When I arrived to the dorm, a woman in a wheelchair opened the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 199

You deserved it 274 486