Intimacy: Exchanged

Exchanged

By jadkins - 06/07/2009 19:33 - Netherlands

Today, I was flirting with this cute girl from Croatia who is part of the my exchange group in Holland. After a few beers and some smooth talking, she led me inside to a closed off room. We were about to have sex when her boyfriend of two years called and proposed to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 915

You deserved it 22 240

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Same thing different taste

Caught

By Anonanon - 12/07/2011 17:10 - United Kingdom

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after, he gave me the "let's just be friends" speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex-girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 923

You deserved it 13 842

A tale as old as time

By Anonymous - 18/12/2023 17:00 - United States - Huntsville

Today, a really cute girl from my class invited me out for a few drinks. I’ve had a crush on her all year and thought this was my chance. We went out but it turns out she has a boyfriend of 5 and a half years she plans to marry. I saw her as a potential girlfriend and I guess she saw me as something else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 565

By Anonymous - 09/11/2015 00:18 - Netherlands

Today, after months of Tinder-ing, first dates and being rejected, I finally was able to hook up with a girl. We met, we kissed, we danced and I took her back to my place. She then promptly tried to make out with my roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 252

You deserved it 3 177

By Anonymous - 30/08/2014 06:44 - New Zealand - Wellington

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 858

You deserved it 6 266

Thanks for the support!

By selfesteemloss - 10/08/2013 23:41 - Spain - Barcelona

Today, I was flirting with a cute bartender on my last day in Spain. It was going well until we somehow got onto the topic of how I was recently dumped by my boyfriend of 3 years via Facebook. He spent the next 5 minutes laughing and telling his coworkers how hilarious that was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 263

You deserved it 8 996

The best time of your life

By Anonymous - 02/08/2021 20:01

Today, the girl I've been flirting with for a few weeks invited me to a house party. I gradually found out that she's been talking to my good buddy, they've been dating, actually they've been banging the whole time. And now she's in a bikini bouncing on his lap as we play Cards Against Humanity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 134

You deserved it 237

On a promise

By cuz803 - 12/08/2022 00:00

Today, after two and a half years of being single, I locked eyes with a cute girl. We were the same height at 6'1 so we joked that if we had a baby, it'd be huge. After some flirting, roughhousing, and making out, she gave me her number, and told me to bring condoms to her place. Then I woke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 617

You deserved it 368

By Anonymous - 09/01/2010 21:26 - United States

Today, after months of hardcore flirting with this incredibly attractive guy, he invited me to hang out. At which point he introduced me to his boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 410

You deserved it 7 703

Cheers

By ineedanotherdrink - 07/08/2009 09:43 - United States

Today, I went out drinking with a friend I've been crushing on for a while now. After we'd been talking and had a few, she said, "Man, I haven't gotten laid in months! Do you mind?" Surprised but hopeful, I nodded. She leaned over, hugged me, and went to hit on a guy by the bar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 846

You deserved it 5 541

By wtfjusthappened - 31/01/2014 15:29 - United States - Redmond

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 830

You deserved it 13 049

FacePALM24 0

Monday 6 July 2009 23:21

Who proposes over the phone, especially when she's in another country?

swagmonkey 0

Monday 6 July 2009 23:07

Did you KNOW she had a boyfriend? If so, you deserve it, but otherwise FYL.

Comments

MathildeXD 8

Saturday 23 November 2013 22:08

Bad for you and bad for her boyfriend. He has a ***** for a girlfriend/fiancé

haxthis 3

Tuesday 5 August 2014 17:56

Where were you? At her house?

LavenderParadise 2

Thursday 21 May 2015 22:00

You should have let him know the situation. I will never understand why people cheat. . ridiculous -.-

alex_gen 38

Saturday 13 June 2015 16:03

Everybody dissing the girl for being a *****, but no one cares that he was about to sleep with a girl he's only been talking to for one day?

fantasyworld 37

Sunday 16 August 2015 22:47

Who proposes over the phone?

turdwrangler 18

Thursday 28 April 2016 5:53

Did you celebrate her engagement for her boyfriend?

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The Top

Today, I took my girlfriend out to Outback Steakhouse. We went to one outside of town because my wife works at our local one. When we got there, guess who we saw? I forgot she transferred to another location, which just happened to be this one. Goddamit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39

You deserved it 1 307

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 706

The Top

Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote, "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 174

You deserved it 56 457

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 676

You deserved it 6 518

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 909

You deserved it 60 289

Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 013

You deserved it 5 484

Today, I tested the new taps in the shower, with my head. Yep, they're strong enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 619

You deserved it 25 832

Today, at work a woman came up to the check out counter and when I greeted her she said "oh honey, you are so beautiful!" I immediately smiled and thanked her, then she looked at me and said "oh, not you." and then pointed to her ear. She was on her bluetooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 931

You deserved it 6 749