Miscellaneous: Funny guy

Funny guy

By stillembarrassed - 06/08/2013 17:01 - United Kingdom

Today, the window cleaner did his rounds at my house. I sat at my mirror applying makeup and doing my hair. When he came to my window, he yelled rather loudly, "Stop putting on a show for me, you dirty slut!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 432

You deserved it 6 688

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Same thing different taste

Windows 2019

By James - 06/09/2019 02:04

Today, a group of angry women stormed my boss’s office, complaining I was harassing them and peeping through their windows. I'm a window washer, and these women never buy curtains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 831

You deserved it 136

By cock blocked - 22/04/2015 15:44 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 145

You deserved it 2 474

By f-ugly - 25/03/2013 18:36 - United States

Today, I was freshening up my makeup in the car before a date. An old lady walked by and said through my open window, "Don't bother. There's no helping you, honey." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 261

You deserved it 4 559

Gross prank, dude

By MonCoiffeurAdoré - 28/06/2012 02:43

Today, I caught my stylist in the mirror attempting to get his colleague to laugh by spitting on my head while washing my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 049

You deserved it 2 127

By Magicali - 22/04/2013 02:56 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 320

You deserved it 15 314

By 123literateABC - 04/11/2015 03:10 - United States - Grand Haven

Today, at work, the janitor would not stop telling me how good I looked. This was after he told me he was fired for sexual harassment at his last job. He clearly learned that lesson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 526

You deserved it 1 547

By WamBamSam - 21/11/2012 09:54 - United Kingdom - Kidderminster

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 096

You deserved it 2 356

By inyobeddd - 02/05/2013 08:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my crazy neighbor came up to me in the street and slapped me across the face, accusing me of leering through her restroom window while she showered. I'm gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 927

You deserved it 6 719

Dirty room

By love you too honey boo - 13/01/2020 05:00

Today, I sent a scantily clad pic to my boyfriend, to which he responded "Nice, but please clean your room". FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 2 304

By Anonyme - 09/07/2011 00:11 - France

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 976

You deserved it 83 937

CueTheMusic 22

Wednesday 7 August 2013 0:09

I would tell him that his services are no longer required at your place. What an ass.

Cor1nn4 10

Wednesday 7 August 2013 0:08

He's got problems

Comments

FerretOfDOOM 3

Friday 9 August 2013 17:04

Yeah- you were OBVIOUSLY getting all pretty just for him, pfft. What a delusional, cocky bastard

UNLUCKYyY1037 26

Saturday 10 August 2013 1:53

You shoulda mooned him!! "How's that for a show?!?"

WhiteCrimson 23

Monday 12 August 2013 6:15

What an ass.... Hope you opened your window and gave him a shove down....

MrPortalFan 21

Monday 30 September 2013 14:42

Yell back, "Stop staring in through my window, you pervert!"

Baller_Bob 17

Sunday 9 February 2014 7:22

If you're on a high floor of a building, go outside and cut his supports. When he falls say: "Stop putting a show on for me!"

Keywords

My ex Awkward Love AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Relatable Work Money DIY Kids Parenting Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, an absolute cretin of a lorry driver ran into the back of me as I was slowing down for an orange light about to go red. My car is totalled and he had the nerve to tell the police I had brake checked him on purpose, probably for an insurance scam, and that it was all my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472

You deserved it 64

Today, I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I can only have sex with really fat men, because that’s what turns me on, yet as soon as the sex is over, through no fault of theirs, I have to run to the toilet to be sick because I can’t believe what I just had sex with. I’m so messed up in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 2 525

The Top

Today, I woke up at 3am to go to work. This will be my new routine from now on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 944

You deserved it 9 882

Today, a man came up to me and asked for a $50 bill in change. Being a good man, I said sure. I gave him the change and he gave me the $50 bill. After walking into Starbucks to buy a coffee, I handed the cashier my $50 bill. She called the cops. It was counterfeit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 891

You deserved it 23 525

Today, my husband moved out while I was out of town. The only thing of his he left behind was a copy of Paradise Lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 144

Today, my sister called after she found out I was hospitalized with surgery complications. Worried about me? Wondering if I'm okay? Nope. Just mad that I texted her an update rather than calling. I didn't call because I had surgery on my throat and can't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 118

You deserved it 1 247

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I feel. She instantly burst out laughing and said "A crush? Dude, what are you, 12?! Hahaha!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 530

You deserved it 6 310

Today, I have an acute URI and acute bronchitis. The cough syrup works amazingly well to stop the coughing, but if I take the cough syrup it gives me insomnia. So I get to choose: do I want to spend all night coughing, or spend all night tossing and turning? FML

I agree, your life sucks 879

You deserved it 79