Gullible's travels

By mikay1413 - 08/10/2019 20:00

Today, my step-sister asked me what an organ donor was. I told her it's someone who delivers pianos. She believed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 307

You deserved it 419

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Vandrefalk - 01/03/2012 00:09 - Norway

Today, I got myself an organ donor card, just to feel wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 956

You deserved it 5 367

By Medic - 29/10/2012 03:10 - United States - Puyallup

Today, at work as an EMT, I was telling a panicked patient that I would be taking her vital signs. I inadvertently said that I would be taking her vital organs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 612

You deserved it 4 344

Play 4′33″ by John Cage

By NonPianoMan - 26/08/2021 16:01

Today, after I'd told this girl I’m seeing that I play piano to impress her, it turns out her father is a pianist and has a grand piano in their house. Tonight, I’m supposed to go to her place to play her my "favorite piece." FML

I agree, your life sucks 186

You deserved it 2 158

By Anonymous - 16/11/2009 18:14 - Canada

Today, my sister was playing a rock star in a play. When she got home, she told me she used one of my old guitars, because I told her it was ok. I said she could take one to practice on, not destroy on stage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 163

You deserved it 4 052

Support system

By Anonymous - 20/02/2024 03:00 - United States - South Park Township

Today, I found out that I have a heart disease. When I went to tell my family, they all said that it should kill me faster so that I can donate my organs to my cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 678

You deserved it 96

By NextAmericanIdol? - 08/08/2013 04:09 - United States - Bowie

Today, I had to put my little sister to bed. Usually my mom sings her a lullaby before she puts her to sleep, so I did too. After I finished the song, my sister looked me dead in the eyes and said, "This is why I tell people we aren't related." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 764

You deserved it 5 610

By Steve.mc - 01/05/2011 07:03 - Canada

Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 466

You deserved it 7 978

By themarrowguy - 23/08/2013 10:06 - United States

Today, after recently discovering that I need a bone marrow transplant, my girlfriend got tested to see if she could be a donor. When the results came back with a negative match, she blurted out, "Oh thank god." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 171

You deserved it 4 358

By Carrie G. - 27/07/2012 00:46 - United States - Holland

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why period blood couldn't be saved and donated to the hospital for transplants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 693

You deserved it 2 447

By Anonymous - 27/05/2019 10:00

Today, I pretended to have a heart attack so my baby sister would know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she drank my soda instead of helping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 1 722

bl3ur0z3 17

Tuesday 8 October 2019 20:06

F your stepsister's life, she has a sibling who preys on her innocence and lack of knowledge.

kfchicken 31

Wednesday 9 October 2019 0:12

it's called a joke, or sarcasm.

Comments

bl3ur0z3 17

Tuesday 8 October 2019 20:06

F your stepsister's life, she has a sibling who preys on her innocence and lack of knowledge.

ChromaScarlet 12

Tuesday 8 October 2019 20:09

I'm sure this was intended as sarcasm when said to the sister in law

Mathalamus 24

Tuesday 8 October 2019 21:08

Why would you deliberately spread wrong information?

kfchicken 31

Wednesday 9 October 2019 0:12

it's called a joke, or sarcasm.

Mathalamus 24

Wednesday 9 October 2019 9:55

No. Such jokes have no place in most areas of life.

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 8 October 2019 22:09

If I got an FML for every time I messed with someone and got them to fall for it, my life would be very F'ed!!

Sinshine 28

Wednesday 9 October 2019 1:16

The question here is how old the sister is. If she's 8, that would be a shitty thing to do. If she's 16+, that lack of knowledge is really sad.

fjvitt 14

Wednesday 9 October 2019 1:34

I was like “why...because it will fall on you...????). Can I have your sister’s number?

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The Top

Today, I came home to my drunk husband, to find that he raided our fridge and freezer to soothe his beer munchies. That would have been fine, had he not eaten the top tier of our wedding cake I'd been saving to eat on our first wedding anniversary, which is in 4 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 215

You deserved it 14 071

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 341

You deserved it 3 784

The Top

Today, my wife read a Facebook article about how oral sex can lead to mouth and/or throat infections, and is now avoiding all forms of sex, in case my penis happens to give her the bubonic plague. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 261

You deserved it 248

Today, I got a new roommate. He's from Mongolia. He has had 5 friends over for the last 7 hours, all speaking Mongolian. This is the most awkward party I have ever been to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 626

You deserved it 1 896

Today, I was singing in the shower, when some suds from my shampoo fell into my mouth and down my throat. I retched and sputtered for about two minutes before finally throwing up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 730

You deserved it 7 765

Today, I was in a shop with my 9 month-old son. He was babbling gibberish as babies do, and repeatedly said what sounded like the N-word. We're white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 161

Today, I woke up to my whole room ruined, it was a mess and everything was torn and chewed up. I suddenly see a dog walk across the hall. I don't have a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 379

You deserved it 2 536

Today, ever since I let my boyfriend touch my boobs, he thinks it's appropriate to grope me whenever he feels like it. Even talking to him about it doesn't seem to stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 120

You deserved it 218