Kids: He can run, but he can't hide

He can run, but he can't hide

By Depressedegg - 08/03/2017 18:00

Today, my toddler realised that my pregnancy means I can't move easily anymore. He celebrated his freedom by doing everything he's not allowed to, and staying just outside my reach at all times. He loves his new game, and it looks like he's not going to stop anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 696

You deserved it 831

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

Call the Midwife-slash-Locksmith

By mama bear - 16/10/2019 18:00

Today, my one-year-old son locked me out of the house. I had no spare key and both him and my 4-month-old decided that was the perfect time to scream bloody murder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 461

You deserved it 340

By Anonymous - 13/10/2012 11:37 - United States

Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 177

You deserved it 2 776

It's always in the most obvious place

By Anonymous - 27/02/2023 14:00

Today, my toddler thought it would be funny to hide my car keys. After searching for hours, I found them in his toy box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 189

By oldmama728 - 28/04/2011 11:07

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 375

You deserved it 46 385

By Literal Baby-Daddy - 02/07/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - Middlesbrough

Today, my toddler threw a screaming, rampaging fit, because I ate the last chocolate mousse from the fridge. Did I forget to mention said toddler is actually my 52 year old dad? FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 187

You deserved it 700

By Anonymous - 27/03/2013 08:00 - United States - Temecula

Today, I came home from a relaxing, peaceful vacation. When I got home my 4-year-old son was free-balling with poop all over his body, screaming "Bob the Builder will kick your ass." The baby sitter is nowhere to be found and I can't get him to stop saying, "I love ass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 977

You deserved it 6 001

Baby shark

By Lordofdance - 13/10/2017 16:00

Today, the only way my newborn sleeps is if I dance around with him strapped to me. Six hours and counting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 926

You deserved it 490

By mr - 27/07/2010 18:44 - United States

Today, I realized every time I go to take a poop, my 9 month old crawls into the bathroom and sobs at my feet. I now have to let my 9 month old sit on my lap while I shit, because I can't do it any other way. The end to all privacy has now come. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 767

You deserved it 10 425

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 17:01 - United States - Portland

Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 365

You deserved it 3 110

By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 21:10 - United States

Today, a funny smelling liquid was sprayed all over the computer. Last week, I told my fully pottytrained but extremely reluctant toddler that he couldn't play Barney games until he used the big boy toilet. A 4 year old's revenge really sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 898

You deserved it 5 604

GhostFox 33

Tuesday 7 March 2017 0:38

You could try the "ignore the bad behavior" thing to see if he get bored, or start taking away his toys one by one every time he does something he isn't supposed to. If you do the second one, tell him that's the rule. Don't give them back until he does chores to earn them back.

TabooSushi 24

Wednesday 8 March 2017 19:33

Sounds like it's time to start taking toys and movies and all his other favorite things away until he learns that he is not going to get away with that just because you can't physically stop him.

Comments

cchamberlin1 13

Thursday 9 March 2017 4:18

My mom just always kept a choncla near by. Couldn't smack me with it, but throwing it at my head worked pretty efficiently too

Amy78_fml 11

Thursday 9 March 2017 12:51

I had the same problem with my 6 year old. I resorted to carrying a fly swatter around. It helped tremendously.

Funny_fiend 2

Friday 10 March 2017 7:18

that boy is going places

Hippo_Holiday 19

Friday 10 March 2017 11:45

As the reboot ben 10 once said, "Time to get to work"

ZDRANO 9

Tuesday 14 March 2017 9:08

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

niccotaglia 17

Thursday 16 March 2017 9:31

Just take away all his toys, movies, his phone and only give them back if he does chores

BeardedLondoner 24

Tuesday 15 August 2017 5:09

Just slap him on the back of the leg when you get him. Explain why he got slapped and He'll quickly learn not to act like that, and hopefully won't grow up to be an entitled little shit. If you allow him to walk all over you now, he will for the rest of your life.

sharond23 10

Tuesday 16 January 2018 15:40

you sound like an awful parent with no control over your brat kid

J15237 25

Thursday 12 December 2019 2:18

Kids are so mean some times. Since this post is old that means now you have a mean little 4 year old and a mean little 2 year old. I feel bad for you.