This is not okay. He should not be allowing her disrespect towards you. The way she treats you should be reason enough for him to break it off. I get that not all poly relationships involve a triad where all three people are involved with each other romantically, but all three have to respect each other, and the relationship of each partner with the other partner. Your situation isn't healthy, and you need to have a talk with him. There was one point my husband/Sir and I were considering allowing a third into our D/s relationship, on the condition he would only be her Dom in non-sexual ways. From the get go she started disrespecting me. Like she felt that my opinions and requests were invalid because I wasn't the Dom. When I told my husband that her actions were disrespectful, and what they meant from a woman's point of view, and showed him the opinion of another woman (close friend of ours), he said he understood my point and told her things weren't going to work out and ended it. A poly situation can only be successful if all involved parties respect each other and boundaries. Your husband should be putting his foot down with the other woman. And if he can't be fair to you both, then it's not going to work in the long run and someone is going to get hurt.

Don't you guys have any rules? Seems to me you should get half the sack time with him and she should sleep on the couch half the time. Of course, if it were me, I'd stay in the middle of the bed and keep my bitches apart when they're not getting along.

Umm wow your a fool for allowing this and statistically speaking from recent studies. about polyamorous married relationships they have a divorce rate that is approximately 95% ,there is also an extremely high murder / suicide rate. Only about 5% of these type of relationships are successful because the involved parties must be very mature, open in communication and mentally stable. So good luck with that mess

What do you expect? You are basically in a million old relationship, contending for the male's attention.

That sounds rough. For me, 1 on 1 relationships are complicated enough already.

YOUR house, YOUR husband. If you both are on the house info, get back there and tell her off, tell her to get out, and have a long discussion with your husband about it.

You’re not actually in any sort of amorous relationship are you? How did it get to this?

I don't understand why there are so many YDIs. Considering you are the wife and she is another woman (not a sister-wife) your husband should be on your side and him not being there is definitely a FML.

as a poly person. good. date separately

looks like you need to find another boyfriend/ girlfriend and kick them to the couch