Live from Salt Lake City

By Anonymous - 20/07/2020 20:02

Today, I’m in a polyamorous relationship with my husband and another woman. She has anger issues and has been very abusive to me, and finally told my husband she wants to break up with me. Not him... just me. She’s still sleeping in our bed with him, and I’m sleeping on the couch. FML
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You deserved it 3 374
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Top comments

TxKitten 8

This is not okay. He should not be allowing her disrespect towards you. The way she treats you should be reason enough for him to break it off. I get that not all poly relationships involve a triad where all three people are involved with each other romantically, but all three have to respect each other, and the relationship of each partner with the other partner. Your situation isn't healthy, and you need to have a talk with him. There was one point my husband/Sir and I were considering allowing a third into our D/s relationship, on the condition he would only be her Dom in non-sexual ways. From the get go she started disrespecting me. Like she felt that my opinions and requests were invalid because I wasn't the Dom. When I told my husband that her actions were disrespectful, and what they meant from a woman's point of view, and showed him the opinion of another woman (close friend of ours), he said he understood my point and told her things weren't going to work out and ended it. A poly situation can only be successful if all involved parties respect each other and boundaries. Your husband should be putting his foot down with the other woman. And if he can't be fair to you both, then it's not going to work in the long run and someone is going to get hurt.

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Brightside86 30

That sounds rough. For me, 1 on 1 relationships are complicated enough already.

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Comments

hdisnfjs91 21

That’s not ok and if he’s allowing that I’d be getting rid of both of them!! Bye Lindas

1 0
Brittani Luce 4

Anyone who is saying you deserve this is a jerk! They do not understand polyamory. From a fellow poly perspective, if you are a primary this is not okay. With poly, a partner being in a relationship that is not approved of isn’t ok. If you discuss with him, and communication is clear that the relationship with her is not okay with you if it is not a triad, and it continues anyways then it enters the realm of cheating. Some communication should happen involving: - whether additional romantic partners are allowed individually, or only together - if only triads, If one primary partner wants out of it, do both need to leave the relationship (like what is happening now) - If individual allowed, do primaries: - reserve the right for ultimate veto, - can strongly suggest against a partner, -or can only express displeasure in choice of parter. There’s many many other important talking points... and it’s so very common to start off not having conversations that are essential to the health of a polyamorous relationship! I made the same mistake, and it led to a downfall in my marriage. Have some uncomfortable and needed conversations. And I wish you all the luck!!

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Nhayaa 21

Did you watch "Why women kill"? 🙄

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k4tn3t0 3

I could be wrong...but this just sounds like your husband is now having an affair under your roof while you sleep on the couch. did he ever want a poly relationship or did he want an "easy" out? poly relationships can be really good when all people are singing from the same song-book.

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