Love, Embarrassing and Awkward: Old dog, new tricks

Old dog, new tricks

By Anonymous - 06/09/2009 21:50 - United States

Today, my mom noticed the hickey that I have on my neck. Embarrassed, I tried convincing her that I burnt myself using a hair straightener. She then told me that that's the same excuse she told my grandma when she got a hickey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 916

You deserved it 47 001

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Dead giveaway

By Minabee - 04/02/2010 18:28 - United States

Today, I'm meeting my boyfriend's very conservative parents for the first time, so I decided to dress appropriately and curl my hair to match. In doing so, I accidentally touched my neck with the iron, and I now have a burn there that look a lot like a hickey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 989

You deserved it 4 903

By tkrause - 01/04/2013 17:17 - Canada - Nelson

Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 452

You deserved it 4 167

By Anonymous - 24/09/2012 19:09 - United States

Today, my mother found a hickey on my neck. Not believing that it was from the hungry 2-month-old child I was holding, she confronted my boyfriend about it. He promptly accused me of cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 901

You deserved it 2 676

Purple rain, purple rain

By wtf?! - 30/05/2020 05:00

Today, out of boredom, I decided to dye my hair. I clumsily spilled some of the purple dye on my chest and shoulders. My insane mother is convinced the marks are hickeys I got from sneaking out and having sex with a boyfriend I don’t even have. She won’t listen, and I’m grounded for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 743

You deserved it 304

By Neckbruise101 - 15/10/2016 06:01 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my boss berated me in front of 2 other coworkers about how unprofessional it was for me to show up to work with a clearly visible hickey. I had to explain to him that my "hickey" was actually a huge pimple that had bruised up after I popped it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 644

You deserved it 871

By sexxibxmami - 19/02/2010 18:24 - United States

Today, my mom came over to visit and permed my hair. Ten minutes after she started, I told her it was burning. She told me to suck it up because it doesn't hurt that badly. I now have scabs all over my scalp, hairline, and nape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 082

You deserved it 3 728

The truth will set you free

By Imnotfromhere - 29/08/2021 23:01

Today, I told my mom I was with my female friend last night, because I wasn't ready to tell her about my new boyfriend. I didn't realize he gave me a hickey and now my whole family thinks I'm a lesbian. They won't stop making fun of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 1 036

By StayPositive - 03/11/2010 00:57 - United States

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 475

You deserved it 9 612

By anonymous - 04/10/2017 20:51

Today, my boyfriend keeps trying to convince me that the hickey on his neck was from his friend attacking him with a vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 495

You deserved it 431

By Pierced - 30/05/2017 18:00

Today, my mother accused me of getting another lip piercing done on the sly to spite her. She finally realised I have more than one and won't believe I've always had two. Thanks for noticing, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 112

You deserved it 440

DeathByFalchion 0

Monday 7 September 2009 1:34

Not THAT big of a deal if it happened to your mom too.

mhmmhmgood 0

Monday 7 September 2009 1:34

haa, ive used that one too

Comments

JP101 0

Monday 7 September 2009 1:53

What are you, in eighth grade? That's dirty and ghetto. Grow up.

epicFAIL7 0

Monday 7 September 2009 3:41

what the ****? fail on your part for being a dumbass.

atoughcookie 0

Monday 7 September 2009 2:01

Wow thats nice. Most straighteners cannot do that though, since they are cool on the outside. And they had straighteners back when your mom was your age? I sense BS.

Minuet 0

Monday 7 September 2009 2:06

It is possible to iron your hair using an actual iron... My mother still has a burn mark from where it slipped as a teenager (pre hair straighteners)

TheLoneWolf87 4

Monday 7 September 2009 2:03

19th now all the trolls will cower in fear!!!!!!!!1!!

Ret_fml 0

Monday 7 September 2009 2:05

YDI for assuming that adults don't actually understand us. Hell, they *invented* most of our excuses growing up.

tradit03 0

Monday 7 September 2009 2:05

was it worth a lie? loser.

pxthugsta 0

Monday 7 September 2009 2:09

you piece of shit, go hickey your arm you retard

Daaniellee1234 8

Monday 7 September 2009 2:10

#18. Most straightners are hot on the outside. Mine gets really hot. The OP's mom probebly used a clothing iron to straighten her hair when she was younger.. Dont really think this is FML worthy though..

F00tball_Playa 0

Monday 7 September 2009 2:14

http://www.swagbucks.com/refer/XRamirez805X copy and paste this and make an account plzzz!!!!!!!!!!!

DameGreyWulf 0

Monday 7 September 2009 2:17

No reason to be embarassed. It's a hickey. Not like she took a look at your vag and found a broken hymen. Durrhurr.

Starchild21 3

Monday 7 September 2009 4:03

Why would she go about doing that??? Am I missing something about moms and daughters?? ____________________________ www.myspace.com/rapid99

DameGreyWulf 0

Monday 7 September 2009 5:10

LMAO No nah, I was just screwing around while telling the OP it's not like it's something quite that serious. Though I wouldn't doubt there are some crazy psycho mothers out there...

zargon 1

Monday 7 September 2009 2:21

Hair straighteners (or curling irons, even) can burn you, sure, but they look pretty much nothing like hickies, so I have no idea why people ever bothered with that excuse....