Work, Liar and Love: Pants on fire

Pants on fire

By Jamie - 04/04/2009 14:42 - United States

Today, I was at working at Burger King as a cashier. A girl I met last night came in and said, "Aren't you that guy from last night?" Last night, I had told her I was going to medical school and was going to be a doctor in less than a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 436

You deserved it 154 565

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Same thing different taste

By Vac - 05/04/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to meet his parents. They informed me they were lawyers throughout the meal, which explained the gorgeous house. My boyfriend excitedly told them I was promoted manager at my job. They asked where I work. I work at Burger King. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 599

You deserved it 8 725

Spooky

By Lizzielollipop816 - 18/02/2010 06:38 - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said, "It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 288

You deserved it 3 660

By cocacola999 - 03/05/2014 10:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a party. Trying to overcome my social anxiety, I was trying to take part in conversations. So, when a girl mentioned she had a doctor's appointment next morning, I blurted out: "What kind of a doctor?" Everyone stared as she responded: "A gynaecologist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 751

You deserved it 7 803

Out of place

By wowthanks - 11/01/2013 19:37 - United States - Baldwin Park

Today, I was asked out by a friend of mine. He's a doctor and works at a prestigious hospital, so thinking we would eat somewhere special, I got all dressed up. We ended up eating at his hospital's cafeteria, because he gets a small employee discount. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 904

You deserved it 7 994

By Anonymous - 24/08/2010 05:52 - United States

Today, I was working at my job as a cashier, checking out an elderly woman's groceries. She was very nice, and we chatted for a couple minutes. Once she had paid, she leaned close to me and said, very politely, "I'm so so sorry that I mistook you for a girl at first, young man." I AM a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 155

You deserved it 4 931

Office embarrassment

By mog - 07/11/2019 08:00 - United States

Today, the girl who works at the liquor store came to where I work. She recognized me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 431

You deserved it 889

Too tired for this shit

By Anonymous - 30/07/2023 00:02

Today, I met a girl at an airport before an early flight, after I’d only had 3 hours sleep. She moved here for a job in radiology. We joked, laughed, flirted, and parted ways. I told my friend, who asked why I hadn't get her number. I joked I would’ve if she'd been a doctor. He then says, “Radiologists ARE doctors, duh!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 1 476

By Anonymous - 11/01/2014 02:25 - United States

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 978

You deserved it 9 614

By MickeyDManager - 03/08/2009 15:08 - United States

Today, I found out that the girl I tutored in high school in basic ENGLISH just received her PhD in Biophysics. I am now the manager of a McDonald's. I was also the Valedictorian of our graduating class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 674

You deserved it 39 193

By Anonymous - 11/02/2013 15:26 - United States - Mansfield

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 935

You deserved it 30 148

MaryJane75 7

Saturday 4 April 2009 20:19

you could have just told her you were working there part time to help pay for med school

tehhotness 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 20:24

"no speaka the english"... then run

Comments

CoolCookie210 22

Wednesday 18 February 2015 5:25

Karma's a bitch

bassfisher100 23

Sunday 26 April 2015 15:16

honesty is always the best path. do u really wanna be liked for your lies ?

roxigrl14 8

Saturday 9 May 2015 20:20

Lol tell her that was your twin that she met last night.

michele2801 1

Saturday 1 August 2015 18:40

barney stinson orrrr?

gilbertclarence 9

Saturday 19 November 2016 3:45

burn

Keywords

Kids Money Health Work Christmas You're fired Fat Bodyshaming Customers Facebook Am I overreacting? Social Media Love AITA Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Miscellaneous Technology Education Students Relatable Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, my future sister-in-law, who hasn’t even been engaged a week, informed everyone that the wedding is on December 19th, which is the due date of my first child. My brother won’t change the date and is making my family choose between his wedding or being at the hospital with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 529

You deserved it 209

Today, I pulled my Christmas tree out of my mother-in-law's garage, only to find out rats had ruined all the lights. The tree cost $2600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 529

The Top

Today, I explained to my sister that the reason she isn't getting job offers is probably because her résumé is in Comic Sans and contains TXT language and a lot of typos. She thanked me for my help by calling me a "clueless horse-fucker" and telling me to shut my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 992

You deserved it 2 511

Today, my PE teacher was yelling at me because I got exhausted too quickly. As we neared the end of the exercise, he declared, "I will let y'all go early if [my name] doesn't give up halfway through this part." With all of the pressure on me, I forced myself to keep going. Then I promptly collapsed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 543

You deserved it 128

Today, after staying up late all week to get work done, I arrived at my job having accomplished all my goals. In my sleep-deprived stupor, I completely forgot to bring the briefcase that had all of the evidence of that hard work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 432

You deserved it 2 668

Today, after my father in law upset my 6-year-old son by telling him creating a world in Minecraft is a sin, because only god is allowed to create worlds so all Minecraft players will burn in hell one day, it's been 5 days since he's slept right because he’s scared the Devil will burn him if he falls asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 607

You deserved it 117

Today, I found out my class was attempting to raise money for me through a bake sale because some girl spread a false rumor that I was raped and that my father was going to disown me. The whole school believes it and my biology teacher took me aside and asked if I needed someone to confide in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 110

You deserved it 3 112

Today, I've realized years of my mom and my grandma constantly "jokingly" touching me inappropriately has caused me to develop a defense mechanism where I jump out of my skin whenever anyone touches me unexpectedly, or gives me physical affection in any form. No one believes this when I tell them, because I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 590

You deserved it 118