this is the fourth time your husband died?

This is a really depressing Fml..... :/

Ok so send them a letter saying "Your dad died 4 years ago. But thanks anyways."

I would put "return to sender" and maybe they will get the hint...

well you must have done something wrong

As someone who went a year without talking to her own parents due to their drunk, violent behavior, I want to tell all the people who are saying her kids are so horrible that there's a reason behind every decision that a person makes and you should really think about every viewpoint before you judge. In this case my automatic gut feeling is that she's leaving something out and I'm sure if we knew what it was it would make all the difference. I hope OP does find a way to reach her children because even if it were my own screwed up family I would still want to say goodbye.

I refuse to believe that they wouldn't know.

Send them both a letter?

L2Leaveamessage

I think they may know that their father is dead but do not want to accept it, therefore sending cards every year to make it seem like their father is still living.