Love, Embarrassing, Poopoo peepee, Awkward, Smells and Parents: Smells like teen shit

Smells like teen shit

By great 1st impression - 25/05/2014 16:09 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming, "What the fuck?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 970

You deserved it 7 926

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Same thing different taste

By impatient amy - 27/01/2009 14:23 - Ireland

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I had bad stomach cramps so I asked if I could use the bathroom. After half an hour, I flushed the toilet, it backs up and floods the bathroom. To make things worse, when I opened the door, I slipped on the wet tiles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 885

You deserved it 2 907

By thanksmom - 09/01/2013 19:57 - United States - Tucson

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 646

You deserved it 7 791

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 295

You deserved it 7 527

Sitcom vibes

By Anonymous - 16/11/2013 19:31 - France - Paris

Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 401

You deserved it 48 868

By Anonymous - 16/02/2011 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I had my boyfriend come over for dinner for the first time. It was all going well until my dad started explaining to my boyfriend how to use toilet paper. He even demonstrated it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 942

You deserved it 3 244

By Becca - 31/01/2010 05:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months asked me to spend the night at his apartment for the first time. I had to poop really bad when I got there, so I used his only bathroom. He went after me, and came out a few seconds later, gagging. Apparently, I clogged his toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 069

You deserved it 7 038

Impressive

By Anonymous - 01/01/2010 00:06 - United States

Today, I met my boyfriend's mother for the first time and hoped to make a good first impression. When I tried to say 'Hello', a loud rippling burp came up from my throat, and not only that. A small chunk of mucus flew out and landed on the floor between us. So much for a good first impression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 017

You deserved it 5 841

Nervous gas

By Anonymous - 11/04/2023 03:00

Today, I was out to dinner with my boyfriend and his parents. It was my first time meeting them, so I was a bit nervous. As we were talking, I accidentally let out a loud burp. His parents looked at me in shock, and my boyfriend just laughed and said, "Well, she's certainly comfortable around you two." FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 208

By Anonymous - 17/11/2009 20:05 - United States

Today, I was at home with slight constipation, so I took two laxatives. That's when my boyfriend called me, saying his parents are in town and want to have dinner tonight, this being the first time I've met them. I've already been on the toilet five times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 560

You deserved it 5 933

By lovecrisis247 - 19/12/2010 07:46 - United States

Today, my parents finally invited my boyfriend over for dinner. Everything was going great until my mother asked him his profession. He stuffed his mouth full of lasagna, snorted, and then responded, "I clean shit for a living." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 124

You deserved it 25 502

Exhaling 12

Sunday 25 May 2014 21:24

Febreeze man, it saves you.

hashshim 23

Sunday 25 May 2014 21:28

Cardinal rule of dating: never take a dump at their house the first time you're there.

Comments

cwaziemamma 16

Sunday 25 May 2014 22:27

I feel for you OP

rocker_chick23 27

Sunday 25 May 2014 22:27

#20: Why should a woman have to hold it in? If I have to poop, I am not going to hold it in.

tbro47 23

Sunday 25 May 2014 22:48

To be honest women aren't the only ones that hold it in. I'm not saying I'd destroy my stomach just to avoid a little embarrassment, but I do try everything to not take a dump when I'm on a date and or at a girls house. Why? I'm not a big fan of smelling up other peoples houses for one. And also because if the smell is bad enough it is a turnoff for both parties. It's not being sexist. It's true that a lot of guys don't give a shit, excuse the pun, about when or where they do their business. I've always been a little more reserved and either go before a date or hold it in unless absolutely necessary.

Adam5858 17

Sunday 25 May 2014 23:09

This is one of those FMLs that you laugh out loud at.No matter where you are

octinate 17

Sunday 25 May 2014 23:57

Bad first impression

katttt21 20

Monday 26 May 2014 0:04

That's why you poop before leaving your house.

Chaith 16

Monday 26 May 2014 0:07

If you can't plan around it, my retrospect advice is to just chill for another 5-10 minutes after your dump, after cracking the window. If it's a kill zone for longer than that, tough luck.