Animals and Insects: Sorry, dude - FML

Sorry, dude

By Aussie mate - 24/09/2020 08:01 - Australia

Today, I got up and started getting ready for work. As I entered the bathroom, I noticed a moth in the shower. Feeling generous, I caught the moth in a cup and took it to the front porch. I released the moth and watched it fly away… into a giant spider and its web. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099

You deserved it 231

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Same thing different taste

No good deed…

By oops - 04/12/2009 17:23 - United States

Today, I saw a moth trapped in a spider web. Feeling gracious, I gently freed it, and then took it to the window to let it out. When I opened the window to set him free, my $300 air conditioner fell two stories and smashed on the sidewalk. The moth flew away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 765

You deserved it 36 395

By foreverDark - 14/05/2012 12:40 - United States - Aurora

Today, I woke up after a long night of trying to catch a moth. I'd knocked down furniture and screamed up the house to do so, but I finally got it. What did I see first thing this morning? Another moth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 610

You deserved it 23 521

By Anonymous - 02/08/2009 21:20 - Canada

Today, a moth was flying around my house. Annoyed, I picked up a shoe to crush it with. The moth landed on a light fixture on the ceiling, so I made my move. Dead, the moth slipped gracefully through air and onto my head. So did the light fixture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 823

You deserved it 51 985

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 321

You deserved it 7 652

By spiderbaby - 06/10/2015 19:43 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months. As soon as I did, dozens of tiny baby spiders blew in with the breeze, and dispersed in my kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 537

You deserved it 2 528

My finest hour

By Anonymous - 04/05/2024 06:00 - Canada

Today, I finally conquered my fear of spiders by catching one in a cup and releasing it outside. Feeling proud of my bravery, I proudly showed my accomplishment to my roommate, only to realize it wasn't a spider but a piece of lint. I screamed louder than I would have for a spider. FML

I agree, your life sucks 310

You deserved it 199

By HighasaCloud - 10/12/2016 02:38

Today, while typing at my desk, I leaned back in my chair to stretch my arms. A spider dangling from the ceiling must have been watching me since it had perfect timing on its descent right into my open yawning mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 639

You deserved it 771

By pinkXpress1023 - 08/07/2013 18:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 121

You deserved it 4 989

By dre_bro11 - 06/11/2011 12:17 - Australia

Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 063

You deserved it 12 473

Yeet it

By Sasquatch - 02/11/2017 22:14

Today, while showering, I noticed a spider drowning in the bath. Spiders gross me out but I felt a moral duty to save it. Reluctantly, I scooped it up and carried it to safety. Then I realised it was my housemate's pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 793

You deserved it 1 276

Next

Top comments

Chazzster 28

Thursday 24 September 2020 20:10

Nature can be cruel. On the other hand you did manage to feed the spider.

brenniman 10

Friday 25 September 2020 2:04

So, in theory, it would a definite FML more for the moth than you.

Comments

Engin Yirci 9

Thursday 24 September 2020 14:52

It just was not meant to be haha

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 24 September 2020 15:39

Murdering it in the shower would have been a better death.

Chazzster 28

Thursday 24 September 2020 20:10

Nature can be cruel. On the other hand you did manage to feed the spider.

be82tw 17

Thursday 24 September 2020 21:14

The spider greatly appreciates your generosity.

brenniman 10

Friday 25 September 2020 2:04

So, in theory, it would a definite FML more for the moth than you.

tounces7 27

Saturday 26 September 2020 1:17

At least you gave the spider an easy meal.

Brightside86 30

Sunday 27 September 2020 18:42

Plus side, the spider finds you generous now.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from high school at the exact pizza shop we met at where I worked in high school. She broke it off with me after she caught me cheating with her best friend. These days, she's a lawyer who makes six figures a year. I still work at the same pizza shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 306

You deserved it 125 968

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." FML

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You deserved it 5 144

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 22 492

You deserved it 4 367

Today, I was talking to my fellow coworker about how nervous I was about sleeping with this guy I really liked. She's been constantly giving me advice about him for months, but today she said "Oh don't worry, he isn't that good in bed anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 161

You deserved it 3 340

Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 926

You deserved it 5 123

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I agree, your life sucks 33 839

You deserved it 5 164

Today, my cat died. But, before he could bite the dust, he left a goodbye present on my bed: a decapitated baby rabbit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 964

You deserved it 4 448

Today, while talking to a boy, he asked what my name was and in a state of panic, I said, "Daddy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 562