Supportive
By makayta - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Los Angeles
By makayta - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Los Angeles
I'm sorry, some people can just be mean
People ask that just to be polite. In this context, the answer is always "Fine."
Unless the coworker is actually a friend OP hangs out with outside of work your right "fine" they probably don't care.
True, but since the OP mentioned "coworker," I'm not assuming they are a friend.
considering the reply to op, I'm not assuming they're a friend, ngl. it's seriously shitty to expect them to say they're fine tho like. I do it to complete strangers, sure, but when it's people I see regularly I'm gonna be honest, whether they're sincere or not. what an asshole tbh.
I'm sorry, #2, but you make it sound as if it's OP's fault for being honest and admitting something was wrong. Telling them they should just claim to be fine is like saying "next time keep your mouth shut and you won't get hurt." It isn't OP's fault. It's natural to assume that if somebody asks you how you are, it's because they actually give a shit. OP shouldn't have to lie to avoid people being unpleasant. The coworker could just as easily have chosen not to ask if he didn't actually want an answer, or could have chosen not to be an ass.
That's a very American thing. In Germany were don't usually ask people how they are doing as a general greeting and if somebody does, they'll get an honest response. It's quite simple: If you don't want to know how someone's doing, don't ask them how they're doing.
To quote my boyfriend: My mother always taught me to be honest. It might have a little too inconsiderate, but you kind of walked into that one. Generally people don't care about others problems if they're not close. It's kind of sad, but it is how it is. I hope you have someone that you can talk to.
Wow. What a dick...If he didn't actually care, why'd he bother asking? If it were me, I'd rather somebody not bother saying anything, rather than be rude about it. I don't blame you for feeling down if that's what you have to deal with at work, OP. I hope you feel better soon. Don't let your douchebag of a coworker get to you.
Because, for whatever reason, it seems to be common courtesy to ask such things at the outset of a casual conversation between acquaintances. I don't really understand it either.
Innocent explanation: your coworker interpreted "You don't want to know" to mean "Thank you for your concern but I would rather keep my private matters private."
I hate when people ask questions they genuinely do not want to know the answer to. However, in the co-worker's defense, "you don't want to know" can come across as very accusatory or possibly very attention seeking. OP could have responded by simply stating they'd rather keep their business private.
Your coworker was just taking you at your word. If you wanted them to care, you might've tried a bit less rude response.
Completely agree. The co-worker's response was rude, yes, but he was probably annoyed at OP's answer of "you don't wanna know" which would have annoyed me too.
Well, he or she was honest, at least. It may sound harsh, but it is possible for a co-worker to be concerned that you are all right without being prepared to dive into all your private problems. Look on the bright side and appreciate that someone noticed and asked.
Keywords
People ask that just to be polite. In this context, the answer is always "Fine."
If you responded that way to get attention from or entice your coworker that's kinda annoying but their response is equally as rude.