At least he kept to the family...

YDI. Its obvious by the way you phrased this, you simply do not comprehend why your family feels the way they do.

All I see in this post is pure selfishness. You’re a sociopath who has zero regards for anyone elses feelings, especially your poor sister. You stole her husband from her and you’re gaslighting and trying to rationalize it. Just remember: The energy you put into this world comes back to you.

Wow. You sound like an absolutely horrific person.

You need to accept that you can't force people to invite you to their gatherings when they don't like you just because of blood relations. People can't choose their families, but they can choose who they want in their lives.

You didn’t choose your sister. Why should she and the rest of your family choose you?

There is something seriously wrong with you. You can't force your family to accept your presence or your relationship. Both you and your husband stay away from them from now on. If you keep pushing, don't be surprised if they get a restraining order against you, or even have you charged with harassment.

I agree that this might have been the end result of OP and her now spouse, cheating on her sister. And that would definitely explain sister and the rest of the family’s reaction… But it is also possible that sister’s relationship fell apart without help from OP, and it’s just OP’s spouse that family is upset with. If that were the case, then OP might have some reason to feel slighted… OP, family (and friend) relationships are complex. In a healthy family you are supposed to have a reasonable degree of loyalty to your family and friends. It’s a big no-no to damage their relationships by “stealing” a spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend if that’s what happened. And if the relationship ended badly, seeing the ex in family gatherings is very touchy at best even if OP had nothing to do with the previous breakup… OP, nothing says you cannot enjoy being married to your spouse. But it’s still kind of soon to expect him to be welcome into family gatherings given the previous relationship to your sister. All you can do is to make your own gatherings with friends who accept both of you.

You absolutely deserve to be banned. You will be lucky if you're ever welcome again. You would never darken my doorstep again. That is your *sister* and you broke her home. Selfish selfish selfish. If one person is an asshole, they're the problem. If everyone is an asshole, YOU'RE the problem

Yeah, I'd ban you too. The way you're talking shows you have zero respect for your family and only care about yourself.