Intimacy: Thanks!

Thanks!

By womboman - 30/07/2011 20:02 - United States

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 795

You deserved it 3 231

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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Same thing different taste

By micheal - 21/06/2011 16:52 - United States

Today, while I was delivering pizza in the torrential downpour, I waited 5 minutes in the pouring rain for an old lady to dig 20 bucks out of her purse. Her total was $19.99. She told me to keep the change and make lots of money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 814

You deserved it 3 548

By ronniewciv - 30/12/2010 07:48

Today, I was delivering pizza in the rain. A woman answered the door, saw me soaking wet and said, "Wow this rain is terrible, it must be horrible to be out delivering in it." She then tipped me 21 cents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 580

You deserved it 3 765

Currency

By PizzaBwaaay - 03/05/2022 22:00

Today, I was delivering pizzas and hit up a dude’s house who ordered two boxes of extra large. He gave me the exact change. I asked him, “What about the tip?” He paused for a minute, let out this loud rancid fart and said, “There’s your tip bub, now piss off!” and shut the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 1 486

By Cano951 - 16/12/2011 20:16 - United States

Today, I was bitched out by a pizza delivery man. I didn't have the cash to pay him for a pizza I didn't even order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 391

You deserved it 2 609

It never rains, it pours

By jaeilssanguh - 26/11/2009 18:49 - United States

Today, I was walking in rain. I had my hands in my pants pockets, so that the front of the jacket was pointing down. Halfway to Taco Bell, my crotch felt exceptionally wet. I looked down to see a wet spot. The rain on my jacket was channeled to my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 073

You deserved it 6 168

All in a day's work

By Steve-noh - 10/08/2018 23:30

Today, at my job as a waiter I sharted myself while taking an order. They tipped me $20 and wrote "for new underwear" on the receipt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 161

You deserved it 595

By dammit33 - 28/05/2012 13:55 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I got a $20 tip from an old lady I delivered pizza to. Ecstatic, I walked back to my car where there was a $30 parking fine waiting for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 799

You deserved it 8 910

Stormy weather

By Anonymous - 20/09/2020 17:00 - United Stated - Portland

Today, I was about to have sex with my long-term boyfriend, when it started to rain. He was so interested in the storm that he left me half naked to look outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 140

You deserved it 255

Protip

By Tipless - 07/11/2009 05:36 - United States

Today, I was working as a Valet driver. After getting no customers for 5 hours in the pouring rain, a woman driving by stops and asks me for directions. Before leaving, she said, "I should probably tip you for that, since that's probably the only money you'd get all night." She didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 947

You deserved it 2 474

By richgirl - 25/02/2010 00:15 - United States

Today, I was doing takeout orders at the restaurant I work at. I spent a long while putting together this guy's $135.00 order. When he finally got there to pick it up, I told him to fill out the credit card slip. I looked at it after he left. He gave me a 40 cent tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 160

You deserved it 4 564

Thabb 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 1:08

You should be honored, to rednecks that's a huge achievement.

Salvikidd 6

Sunday 31 July 2011 1:27

did you see his 16 year old wife?

Comments

scaryasfuck666 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 4:01

Well...At least he had one!

beaglegun 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 4:14

Sterotyoe

sxe_beast 11

Sunday 31 July 2011 4:43

I think I've seen a gay porno similar to this... Yum?

ifeelya 5

Sunday 31 July 2011 5:27

you know he is a redneck if...

keywestsmiles 2

Sunday 31 July 2011 5:48

Oh rednecks... Ya gotta love 'em. The world wouldn't be the same without em.

chahacha599 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 6:31

welcome to america

Nevitt 9

Sunday 31 July 2011 7:05

well did his junk look nice? if it did, i envy you....

SadinSherman 16

Monday 1 August 2011 6:34

Isn't that what the Internet is for?

Groucho_fml 5

Sunday 31 July 2011 7:31

I'm sure rednecks are eternally grateful for that pitiful attempt at a defense. I've seen your other comments, and for future reference, the word is spelled "stereotype."