Love: Time to grow a beard?

Time to grow a beard?

By Ben - 03/08/2017 23:00 - United States - Lansing

Today, my girlfriend told me she won't have sex with me anymore. When I asked her why, she said I've lost too much weight and I look like her son. Her son is 4 feet tall & 9 years old. I'm 6 feet tall & 30 years old. She said having sex with me feel like having sex with her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 964

You deserved it 469

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 28/02/2016 15:57 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I've recently become serious about getting fit, and have lost nearly 84 pounds. Apparently, when I was fat, I made her look smaller in comparison. When I got slimmer, she insisted I either gain the weight back or she'd leave. So she did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 471

You deserved it 1 650

Skinny Love

By Anonymous - 17/04/2021 05:00

Today, my girlfriend of 5 years dumped me because she got tired of me being thinner than her and, in her own words, making her look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 114

Pound for pound

By Anonymous - 27/04/2021 14:01

Today, my girlfriend had a huge fight with me because while I'm trying to gain weight and she’s trying to lose some, I’ve still lost more weight than her. Not my fault my body’s natural preference is to drop pounds like they’re hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 903

You deserved it 139

Stewart Lee has let himself go

By Anonymous - 11/10/2021 14:00

Today, my wife informed me that she hates having sex with me, and only married me because I was dark, trim, and handsome, but now I'm just gray, fat, and soon to be single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 234

You deserved it 139

Hot bod

By Anonymous - 11/11/2010 08:39 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years told me that I appear to have gained some weight. After realizing that it made me feel depressed, he tried to make me feel better by making love to me. I decided to go with it. While doing so, he paused and said, "I'm sorry baby, but your weight is too much pressure for my back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 659

You deserved it 8 692

Flip-flopping

By Brandenn J Moore - 11/07/2021 04:01

Today, my girlfriend, who I've been living with for the last month, told me she's not attracted to me and wants to see other people. She told me this after months of dating and telling me she was thinking about having a child with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 94

By Anonymous - 23/02/2013 08:07 - Australia - Boronia

Today, after supporting my girlfriend for over a year in her endeavour to lose weight, exercise more, and eat better, my now-slender girlfriend dumped me, because she's found someone "better" than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 465

You deserved it 4 345

By Shelling Ford - 25/08/2015 11:55 - Germany - Munich

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I said I wouldn't find her attractive in 20 years. What I actually said was that I wouldn't sleep with her mother now, who happens to be 20 years older than her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 260

You deserved it 3 319

Not the sharpest tool

By Anonymous - 15/02/2021 17:01

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Why? Her six old likes me more than her. I hate kids. I stayed with her in spite of her son, because I love her. For some reason she thought I was going to leave her and take her kid with me. So she broke up with me first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 295

Harsh

By anonymous - 14/12/2011 05:42 - United States

Today, my boyfriend sent me a text that said, "I can't be seen with you anymore. You're too fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 499

You deserved it 12 228

Lobby_Bee 17

Friday 4 August 2017 6:10

Whenever you hear these stupid excuses to not have sex with you, be cautious. A third person might be involved.

gobiteme2 34

Friday 4 August 2017 5:11

Add spice to love life and use a blindfold for her.

Comments

gobiteme2 34

Friday 4 August 2017 5:11

Add spice to love life and use a blindfold for her.

Georgian_fml 15

Friday 4 August 2017 5:29

idk man she just sounds weird, so before you lost weight was she having sex with chubbier you who looks like her son or what?

Goldzilluh 19

Friday 4 August 2017 5:58

That's my thoughts exactly. Lmfao.

Bubbles77777 11

Friday 4 August 2017 5:40

Maybe you have a baby face

BeachMammal 8

Friday 4 August 2017 5:59

Maybe you could wear a mask.

Lobby_Bee 17

Friday 4 August 2017 6:10

Whenever you hear these stupid excuses to not have sex with you, be cautious. A third person might be involved.

smoothpanda 7

Friday 4 August 2017 18:44

Her son?

HanBanana15 9

Saturday 5 August 2017 21:36

Sometimes yes, but being in a relationship doesn't mean you're entitled to sex with said person whenever you want. It's their body, and their choice. Sometimes people just aren't in the mood and others won't take no for an answer so "stupid excuses" are the only way to get the point across.