Miscellaneous: Today, I attended an elderly man's funeral. As I approached the... - FML

By me - 25/01/2012 03:40 - Canada

Today, I attended an elderly man's funeral. As I approached the casket his wife said, "Thank you for coming." I replied with, "No, thank you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 047

You deserved it 30 317

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 20:35 - United States - Tunkhannock

Today, I was working as a nurse, and an elderly man had just passed away. As the patient's wife was leaving she said, "Thank you for taking such good care of my husband." Then I, intending to say "Sorry for your loss," said "Thank you for your loss." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 319

You deserved it 9 340

Condolences

By Anonymous - 13/04/2013 00:13 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I went to the funeral of my friend's brother. It was the first funeral I'd gone to, and I was really nervous. When the service finished, everyone went to pay their respects to the family. After I paid mine, they said, "Thank you for coming." I instictively replied, "My pleasure." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 540

You deserved it 18 442

All dressed up

By Anonymous - 16/10/2021 23:00

Today, an elderly man came into my place of work wearing a nice suit. I commented, saying said he looked nice and asked what the special occasion was. He was going to a funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 804

You deserved it 189

By jalopenos - 29/01/2009 10:27 - United Kingdom

Today, my friend had to leave work early for a funeral. As he was on his way out, I wanted to say something. All I could think of was, "Have fun!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 763

You deserved it 22 733

By Anonymous - 11/03/2013 02:47 - United States - Louisville

Today, a man I once worked with passed away. He was a lovely, caring, and inspirational person whom I looked up to. My husband's form of consolation? "Old people die. Get over it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 926

You deserved it 4 062

Classic blunder

By churchman - 28/06/2021 00:01 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I serve at church and had a funeral. As I greeted the family, someone asked how I was doing. Without thought, I responded, "Good to be alive." FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 795

By Anonymous - 27/07/2019 15:01 - United States - Pomona

Today, I held the door open for someone and he said, "Thank you!" I said, "Thank you!" back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 282

You deserved it 464

By fuck people - 02/08/2013 20:58 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I attended the funeral of a close friend. Most of the other guests were openly grinning and joking around, and the guy in front of me kept muttering, "That's what she said!" during the eulogy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 044

You deserved it 3 188

By dummy - 22/05/2009 05:12 - Canada

Today, my grandpa took out the family for dinner and paid for everyone. He paid the bill and my family and I were waiting by the door. I realised I probably should thank him for dinner. I turn around without thinking and give him a big hug and say thanks for dinner Grandpa. It wasn't my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 304

You deserved it 44 910

Good

By fistpumpin4life - 10/10/2010 00:51 - France

Today, at work, I asked a lady how she was doing. When she replied, I didn't understand her, and instead of asking her what she'd said, I just replied with, "Oh, that's good." What she'd said that I didn't understand was that her husband had just died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 594

You deserved it 33 421

Next

Top comments

HaloR 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 9:03

Brain fart,i had like 20 today bad stuff

jerseyboy732 16

Wednesday 25 January 2012 9:06

I'm sorry op. In cases where someone we know dies our body can get very stressed and cause us to say/do things that really don't make sense... sorry for your loss

Comments

roxyelizabeth 3

Friday 27 January 2012 18:28

I hate when being polite & having manners comes back to bite us in the ass. Lol.

zacko1987 0

Saturday 28 January 2012 15:30

Okay wildly insensitive comment, but you attended a dead man's funeral. and what was up with that "double an" guy? My condolences.

sportsftk 5

Sunday 29 January 2012 23:41

FYL? don't you mean FYI...awk

Trollin56 0

Monday 20 February 2012 13:23

Wow! It must suck to be you!

Mandie56 4

Wednesday 27 March 2013 15:15

"Thank you sir for dying so I could be invited to your funeral, it was very nice; I enjoyed the free refreshments. I just love it when I can get free food at the expense of dead people" LOL ......I'm sorry..... I just had to go there....

Kc1001 14

Thursday 13 June 2013 3:34

You must work at McDonalds. there you're forced to thank someone back. I did it for a year after I quit.

britbear122812 7

Sunday 29 December 2013 16:51

I hope apologized..... or came up with a lame excuse at least.....

kiaroxilles 8

Thursday 10 July 2014 20:03

That's when you follow up with, "Thank you for inviting me. I'm so sorry for your loss."

jeff_boles 12

Monday 23 March 2015 0:50

That's when you add, "...for all that you've done. You and your husband. He was a great man. I'm sorry for your loss. If you need anything, just let me know."

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The Top

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 551

You deserved it 49 635

Today, I woke up with a hangover and my girlfriend seemed pissed at me. It took me a while before I remembered having sex the night before. I just didn't know exactly what had happened after that had pissed her off. Then I realized nothing happened, because I fell asleep while she was on top of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 667

You deserved it 39 751

The Top

Today, it's my 35th birthday. My wife greeted me naked, and with an itemized list of what's off limits. A list of what was on the menu would've been much shorter and might have had better spelling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 074

You deserved it 202

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 376

You deserved it 33 761

Today, I went to see my grandfather in hospital, to see how well he's recovering from his stroke. He asked who I was. After I told him I'm his grand-daughter, his head almost rolled off his neck in disappointment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 357

You deserved it 2 289

Today, I was at work at a local hot dog chain. A child (about 10, who I've seen there before) came in to order food for his Dad. He orders very excitedly, and I told him he'd be a great worker here when he gets older. He said "oh no, my Dad says I'm too smart to work in a place like this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 031

You deserved it 13 938

Today, a woman cursed me out, called me a perverted freak, and said I should be ashamed of myself because I had asked her "How much for one night?." She works in a toy shop, I was with my five year old daughter, and was pointing to the sign, "Rent A Helium Tank!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 210

You deserved it 3 311

Today, I got stuck in a revolving door and had to be rescued by the fire department after about 30 minutes of walking in circles with no open exit. At least they got a good laugh out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 226