Miscellaneous: Today, I found my missing shoe. It hit me as it fell out the... - FML

By Anonymous - 05/01/2012 04:18 - United States

Today, I found my missing shoe. It hit me as it fell out the tree in our front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 192

You deserved it 4 585

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Same thing different taste

Black out

By Shoeless - 20/01/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, after I drank way too much, my friend pulled the car over so I could throw up. Next to my pile of puke was a discarded shoe that looked remarkably like one from my favorite pair. When I got home, I realized that my left shoe was missing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 368

You deserved it 35 415

So frustrating!

By Anonymous - 29/11/2023 18:00

Today, I bought a massive new puzzle to take my mind off of things. Hours later, I realized there was a missing piece. Frustrated, I looked everywhere for it, only to discover it was stuck to the bottom of my shoe, and I'd been walking around with it all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 139

By jackelking - 25/05/2009 08:33 - United States

Today, I was at my friends' farm and we decided that we wanted to go to their old treehouse. When we got down there, it turned out my friend Cat had forgotten her shoes. Being a gentleman, I lent her my sandals. I then climbed the treehouse, fell out, and got a nail through my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 059

You deserved it 6 940

Mind the gap

By NotDrunk - 11/09/2012 06:47 - United States - San Diego

Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 761

You deserved it 2 603

If the shoe fits…

By Bruce - 17/08/2010 17:09 - United States

Today, I discovered a bat in my new apartment. I found him in my shoe… with my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 707

You deserved it 3 653

By fEk - 22/03/2019 09:00 - Australia

Today, I couldn't find my reading glasses, thinking perhaps i'd dropped them outside, I stepped off my deck bare foot, straight into a steaming dog turd. Only to see my glasses chewed up a few feet away. It went between my toes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 992

You deserved it 343

What happened?

By Kallian - 25/11/2019 03:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I walked home and found a massive branch had fallen into my parking space. My first thought, "Thank God my car wasn't hit!" My second thought, "Where's my car?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 444

You deserved it 146

By Anonymous - 17/04/2013 05:51

Today, it wasn't until I heard something fly off the roof of my car and hit the trunk, then asphalt, that I remembered where I left my phone while unlocking the car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 838

You deserved it 36 780

By Anonymous - 25/04/2012 14:33 - United States - Oakland

Today, I finally found the jewelry my two-year-old son had lost when it got lodged in my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 531

You deserved it 2 729

Do a backflip!

By Anonymous - 22/02/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, I walked out into my backyard. As I did so, my dogs ran past me, slamming the sliding door off its track. I went to catch it, and knocked the bird cage over. To complete the fumble, as I turned to catch the bird cage, I stepped in a dog turd. I wasn't wearing shoes. We're all okay, but… FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 139

Next

Top comments

deviable 9

Thursday 5 January 2012 8:39

I think the important question is: how'd the shoe get in the tree??

Unsorrowful 1

Thursday 5 January 2012 8:42

I guess what goes up, must come down...

Comments

ICATiger 13

Thursday 5 January 2012 11:04

Maybe the shoe is a Ninja......

traviemojo 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 11:04

Damn gangsta's, again?

tingway 4

Thursday 5 January 2012 11:17

i hope it wasn't a stiletto heel!

ronski 41

Thursday 5 January 2012 11:21

Must've been a good party

LinaLyssic 12

Thursday 5 January 2012 11:59

Unless you got hurt bad that's hilarious. Now you have a funny story to tell at parties!

chili10 18

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:38

"guess where I found my missing shoe! Go ahead, guess!"

spongebob1990 3

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:14

Eureka :)

chili10 18

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:14

Cheer up, you found your shoe!

chili10 18

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:24

Somebody probably threw it up there to get down a football or something, I used to do the same thing with my brother's shoes.

spazz666 18

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:25

I would have been more amused had this fml been worded cleverly. "Today, it hit me where my missing shoe has been. Too bad it was falling out of a tree in my front yard when it hit me. FML"

McDonaldsworker 4

Thursday 5 January 2012 13:41

Lmao cleverly written made me burst into laughter at work, lol

inspectorclumsy 6

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:59

Did it hurt?

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Technology Mental health Health Anxiety Sleep Clumsy Noise Roommate AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were three girls loudly discussing blowjob techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was, "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 371

You deserved it 29 703

Today, my neighbour from across the road phoned me at work telling me there was a fire engine outside my house and a lot of smoke. I drove home in a panic, smashing a rear light on a post and getting flashed by a speed camera. It wasn't my house. The firemen were putting out a bonfire next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 6 630

The Top

Today, I went to a family dinner. My grandma wasted no time calling me a slut for not wearing a dress, my dad called my police officer boyfriend a "fucking pig", and then he told my mother to "put a cock in it" when she defended me. No wonder I hardly ever visit these people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 031

You deserved it 3 137

Today, my co-worker came back from Thailand with big new breasts. She told me to go ahead and touch them because they have a funny texture for the first few months. When our GM entered the room, I had both hands down my co-worker's shirt, agreeing that they were unnaturally firm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 361

You deserved it 40 172

Today, I was so lonely that I pretended I wanted to buy something from a telemarketer so that they would keep talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 019

You deserved it 9 785

Today, I left my empty shower running so I could pretend I didn't still live alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 697

You deserved it 29 977

Today, while babysitting, the little boy explained to me why I was single, reasons such as 'unattractive' and 'not the girlfriend type'. I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 448

You deserved it 4 436

Today, I was hit with a sudden urge to shit. I knew it was going to be a bad one, so I ran out of the meeting. I made it to the toilet in time, but I forgot to lift the lid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 565

You deserved it 629