Miscellaneous: Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML

Hey, at least you weren't being harrassed by a man in a Bunny costume. xD After this, you would have a great respect for the Stephanie Plum series (es. #8), by Janet Evaovich. Read, enjoy, be glad the bear wasn't out to kill you.

bsim 0

Monday 14 June 2010 16:25

in soviet Russia, bear hunt you!

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Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 1 842

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 024

You deserved it 3 406

The Top

Today, I'm watching another teen TV show, taking me back to my childhood, which sucked in a million ways, being the poorest and ugliest nerd with an evil father. I never enjoyed a day of my childhood, teenage or school. Grades were a life and death situation, because education was the only way out of that hell hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 152

Today, while trying to pull a nail out of some wood with a crowbar in my theatre class, my girlfriend, who was holding down the wood with her foot, thought it would be funny to move her foot and make me lose my balance. Instead, the crowbar flew up and struck me in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 173

You deserved it 3 411

Today, I found out I only exist because my parents hated each other. They both worked in the same office and despised each other, until they had a hate-fuck in a storeroom after a blazing argument, resulting in me. I exist due to sex fuelled by hatred and lust. Yay me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 884

You deserved it 195

Today, it's the third time my ex has been granted a reduction in his child support payments coinciding with his gold digger getting an expensive gift. The first time it was her 4-carat engagement ring, then it was her breast and butt surgeries, and now a 3-week trip to Hawaii. I can barely afford food for our kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 087

You deserved it 192

Today, the babysitter not only clogged the toilet, they tried to unclog it with our vacuum cleaner hose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 207

You deserved it 2 262

Today, I moved in with my boyfriend. Up until now, I thought my cat was the only four year-old I had to deal with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 339

You deserved it 12 576