Health: Today, I had to remove a splinter from one of my roommates. This...

By Anonymous - 03/04/2017 02:00

Today, I had to remove a splinter from one of my roommates. This would have been better if the splinter wasn't deeply lodged in their asscheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 791

You deserved it 394

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/02/2010 00:44 - United States

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 067

You deserved it 2 805

Don't take medical advice from teachers

By pain - 20/05/2016 04:23 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I got a splinter in my shop class. The teacher dug at it with tweezers for a while, then told me that my best bet would be to wait until the wound got infected and formed a bunch of pus around the splinter to force it out. It's in my dominant hand's palm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 909

You deserved it 1 116

Feel this FML

By Anonymous - 30/07/2016 17:45 - Mexico - Saltillo

Today, I now know how it feels to have a splinter of wood hammered a full inch underneath your fingernail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 696

You deserved it 1 048

By Grrr - 20/07/2012 07:58 - United States - Salem

Today, I was walking in my apartment when I felt something stab my foot. Thinking it was a piece of glass, I looked down. It was one of my roommate's toenail clippings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 387

You deserved it 2 080

By OMFG - 22/02/2010 10:13 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my roommate pop a blister with a skewer and casually place it back in the kitchen drawer, before wiping what seeped out with the teatowel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 914

You deserved it 2 085

Handle with care

By Bad day to be my toes - 08/12/2024 09:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I noticed one of my toenails was getting super long, so I cut it. In doing so, I accidentally ripped it off and it started bleeding. As I went to get something to stop it from bleeding, I got a huge splinter in my little toe, causing a painful infection. I think I should just go back to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 345

You deserved it 179

Surf's up

By will - 11/04/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I finally get to go surfing! On my way out, I got a splinter that’s still way too deep to remove, causing me to cancel the surf day and now it really hurts to walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 131

Sorry, I…

By mel - 18/01/2011 07:05 - United States

Today, I had to blow my nose. Trying to be a considerate roommate, I tiptoed over to the bathroom in the dark, which would have been fine, if I hadn't tripped over a chair and crushed the art project that she's been working on for the past month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 967

You deserved it 8 330

By HairyLeggedItalian - 24/05/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, I was putting a wooden shelf into my new TV stand. Right before I put it in, I rested it on my leg. I then realized that the wood was of poor quality, and it gave me splinters. Now, I can't remove the splinters, because I can't find their exact location under my really hairy legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 754

You deserved it 9 211

Scratch that

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 07:59 - Germany

Today, I got a painful scratch on my nose. Nasty kitty? Nope. I never imagined a dried booger stuck in my handkerchief could be this hard and this sharp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 314

Cynical_1 26

Monday 3 April 2017 2:14

How the hell did they get a splinter in their ass and how did you get unlucky enough to be volunteered to remove it?

Moerighan 23

Monday 3 April 2017 3:32

Today I had a splinter in m ass, my roommate was the one to remove it for me. fml

Comments

Beastninja5268 15

Wednesday 5 April 2017 17:05

How does that happen?

lezlgcy 0

Thursday 6 April 2017 0:58

No1 said it was in their butthole just the cheek!

lezlgcy 0

Thursday 6 April 2017 1:00

Sliding down a bannister? Sliding down a bench? Scratching ur ass w/ a ruler?....

Humanoidfreak 5

Saturday 8 April 2017 1:49

so many questions

campdude90 15

Saturday 8 April 2017 6:36

This is when you call a colorectal surgeon

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The Top

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The Top

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You deserved it 40 794

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You deserved it 1 075

Today, I sold my Christmas gift from my father on eBay as I'm so desperate for cash. It's also the day I got scammed by an eBay buyer. FML

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You deserved it 3 730