Work: Today, I lost my job because I was late. I was late because I...

By Really? - 10/07/2010 14:57 - United States

Today, I lost my job because I was late. I was late because I had no alarm. I had no alarm because my roommate got mad and broke my phone when I beat her at scrabble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 62

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Top comments

stronghand0331 17

Saturday 10 July 2010 19:26

also, permission granted to smack a hoe

chocolatedrop 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 19:24

sounds like its time to move out

Comments

georgelyons 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 13:23

stupid story

MichaelJackson10 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 21:35

; Dude Your Life Totally Sucks lol ! Should Have Just Brouqht A New Alarm Dumb Ass

Kakujin 0

Tuesday 24 August 2010 20:19

Get a ******* alarmclock FFS!

splarf1991 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 10:40

people like you rely to much on there cell phones! ITS CALLED AN ALARM CLOCK!!! look into it

nick3600 22

Saturday 5 March 2011 1:05

LOL U FAIL @ L!F3 G3T AN ALARM CLOCK U ******* DUMBASS

emsiti 6

Thursday 24 March 2011 3:53

you seriously only use your phone i have a phone ipod and radio alarm thing

limepinklis 0

Thursday 24 March 2011 19:05

so don't beat her at scrabble?

BrassKnucklez69 0

Friday 25 March 2011 6:49

i wulda socked her in the face took sumthing valuable of hers and destroyed it.!

Athga 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 7:15

sounds like a personal problem

massivelyskilled 0

Wednesday 27 April 2011 9:47

you deserved it. you were late then your late

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Parenting Kids DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Weird

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Today, I learned that I actually like my boiled eggs a bit softer than I usually make them. I also learned that an outwardly lukewarm egg, when bitten into enthusiastically, is perfectly capable of creating a volcanic eruption of boiling hot yolk all over your hands, clothes and kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 645

You deserved it 413

Today, my girlfriend will only have sex when she's on her period, because it's the only time she gets horny. She also gets body acne, bloating, and utterly foul BO and gas. The sex is so unpleasant, I'm starting to wish she just got cranky and emotional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 211

The Top

Today, I walked into the office bathroom and saw my manager in tears. I tried to comfort her and gave her a hug. Turns out, she wasn’t crying, she was having a sneezing fit, and looked horrified at my sympathy hug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 188

You deserved it 391

Today, I thought that working as a lifeguard I would be saving lives, rescuing people and things along those lines. What do I get told to do on my first shift? Clean all the fecal matter and hair out the pool. I almost threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 989

You deserved it 1 689

Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 655

You deserved it 37 996

Today, I handed my friend a $50. I paid her to take care of my farm on Farmville, feed my fish on Fishville, and flip my burgers on Cafe World, while I went on vacation for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 497

You deserved it 67 658

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 583

You deserved it 5 226

Today, after a few months of my neighbor's friend parking outside his house and honking until he came outside, I happened to be out doing lawn work. I politely screamed, "STOP HONKING YOUR F***ING HORN!" To which they responded by moving in front of MY house and holding down their horn. I hate people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 495

You deserved it 16 990