Intimacy: Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted... - FML

By ShouldveStayedAVirgin - 13/01/2016 18:30 - United States - Houston

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 927

You deserved it 7 088

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 982

You deserved it 3 073

By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 01:23 - Canada - Bedford

Spicy

Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 047

You deserved it 6 089

Nuts

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 20:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 879

You deserved it 6 151

By unsatisfied - 09/02/2010 03:33 - France

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 464

You deserved it 5 362

Giggle loop

By Anonymous - 18/03/2010 10:39 - United States

Spicy

Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 323

You deserved it 38 286

By Anonymous - 14/12/2013 18:50

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 935

You deserved it 9 845

Waste

By Annie - 31/08/2011 03:17 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 819

You deserved it 5 301

By EliseV - 03/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Chino Hills

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 973

You deserved it 6 009

By Emily - 21/08/2011 04:54 - United States

Spicy

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 730

You deserved it 42 662

Happy Valentine's Day

By henhouse - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Brunswick East

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 583

You deserved it 3 829

Next

Top comments

MegasaurusRex89 28

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:07

You can't expect the first time to last that long. Take it as a compliment haha. It will get better.

rieebee 23

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:03

Talk to him about it, make the next time better.

Comments

Lilo4life 26

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:15

Every losing virginity story is like this, if he didn't finish in 10 seconds he's been screwing more than his hand these 7 years, id be great full cause that's how it is for everyone.

Mathalamus 24

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:18

7 years? sorry, but that's a bit long. and it kinda explains why he lasted ten seconds. i wonder how it took 7 years to trust your boyfriend enough to give your virginity.

SpyroMello 29

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:21

Some people believe in abstinence or have reasons for waiting that long. Every person is different but respect to him for waiting that long, especially in this day and age.

amsterdamgirl 20

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:21

sounds like it was his first time too. practice makes perfect!

nickie_94 18

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:24

Just keep trying. It'll get better

cheeeksss 29

Thursday 14 January 2016 9:25

I can't stand how society places virginity on a pedestal. It's almost never perfect and amazing on the first time.

randybryant799 20

Friday 18 February 2022 7:37

7 years he's waited and you're surprised he was quick?

Keywords

Love Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Holidays Lonely Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism You're fired Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 510

You deserved it 15 067

Today, I was working a concert ticket booth. A lady gave me her ticket, I punched it, and told her to enjoy the show. She asked for the “hotel.” Apparently, she thought that the concert ticket cost included a hotel stay, since she traveled from out of state. She cussed me out and had to be escorted out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 333

You deserved it 76

The Top

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 968

You deserved it 8 665

Today, I fulfilled my lifelong dream of going on a family trip to Disneyland. Less than two hours in the park, my kids have been scared shitless by every single character, they don’t want to ride any rides, my husband is drunk, and the mouse ears headband gave me a vomit-inducing migraine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 151

You deserved it 361

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 547

You deserved it 5 871

Today, my laptop was slow so I used my husband’s laptop. I went to the bedroom and found it opened, so I moved the trackpad and it powered on. The first thing I see is a page with redhead porn, and another tab with nude redheads. You know who else is a redhead? The new girl at his job he tells me not to worry about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 540

You deserved it 134

Today, my husband got angry at me, only because I addressed him by his own name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 174

Today, I dragged my entire family to the beach for a swim. I don’t know what was up with the tides but the water was all over the place as soon as we came near. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 41