Miscellaneous: Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago....

By anonymous - 06/06/2013 04:14 - United States - Tehachapi

Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 834

You deserved it 6 530

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/12/2016 09:19

Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 248

You deserved it 1 241

BIKES!

By cwell88 - 21/06/2015 13:29

Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 775

You deserved it 1 777

A "friend" indeed

By Username - 23/07/2011 21:27 - United States

Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 320

You deserved it 3 234

By double trouble - 04/05/2015 04:04

Today, I found my bike that was stolen a week ago in front of someone's house. Now this wouldn't have been a problem if my husband didn't steal it to go meet with his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 892

You deserved it 2 570

By ollie179 - 15/08/2011 19:14 - United Kingdom

Today, my 3 year old son's tricycle was stolen. I looked up the street and saw a neighbour's kid riding it. I marched up, gently lifted him off it, gave him a stern lecture about stealing and brought the tricycle back home. The cops then showed up. Apparently, the kid has an identical tricycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 372

You deserved it 39 462

Frustration level 100

By chris - 05/05/2020 14:00

Today, I saw my bike locked outside a Starbucks down the street from my house. It was stolen about 10 days ago from my communal laundry room. There was even a cop parked across the street, but I have no proof to show that bike even belonged to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 607

You deserved it 218

Arrest them!

By chris - 14/06/2011 05:10 - United States

I agree, your life sucks 34 902

You deserved it 3 870

Good deed, but still…

By poor guy - 13/03/2020 05:16 - United States

Today, I was at Goodwill and I saw my bike, which was stolen from me a couple of weeks ago. It was a gift that my mom gave me for my birthday. The bike was being sold for 65 dollars. I had to buy it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 922

You deserved it 164

By Chelsea - 27/02/2013 22:39 - United States - Aurora

Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 976

You deserved it 2 670

By Anonymous - 04/09/2009 23:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking home from work going over a railway-bridge, when a 12 year old boy standing at the bottom asks if I could help him carry his bike up, as he couldn't lift it. I did it for him, and was greeted on the other side by his father - who thought I was stealing it and hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 241

You deserved it 2 472

kozzard 17

Thursday 6 June 2013 12:45

If you can prove it was your bike, the police can get it returned to you.

Ambient25 24

Thursday 6 June 2013 12:47

That should have been the part where you either popped the tires or threw him off the bike and pedaled like crazy

Comments

jakeydudey 13

Thursday 6 June 2013 14:13

Why so serrriooouuusss?

girlbye23 15

Thursday 6 June 2013 14:14

Steal it back fair and square

still_guns 16

Thursday 6 June 2013 14:19

Heh, that's like saying 'hitler killed the jews, it was totally justifiable

Fluffydemise 18

Thursday 6 June 2013 14:37

No, it's not.

DocBastard 38

Thursday 6 June 2013 15:02

still_guns - I've now read your comment at least 20 times trying to make sense of it, and I just couldn't do it myself. I had to feed it into my Idiot-English Translation Engine, and this is what came out: *whirr* *click* *bzzz* *DING* "I'm a big ******* moron who tried to make an anti-Semitic joke and ended up looking like a total assface." I think it nailed it.

Fluffydemise 18

Thursday 6 June 2013 14:34

That must have been quite a difficult situation for OP to be in. You should have tried to get it back at least. One time someone pushed me off my bike with the agenda of stealing it. In a moment of pure, unadulterated, hulk like rage I picked up the bike and threw it at him. I missed, and caught a bystander right in his shins. I was so embarrassed, but the guy was a lot more understanding than I thought he'd be. By which I mean, he didn't press charges against me!

Ceejay1 13

Thursday 6 June 2013 14:58

Should of took it back from him.

mollyjynxjax 28

Thursday 6 June 2013 16:04

*have taken*

MysticMonkey 9

Thursday 6 June 2013 15:07

It could just happen to be the same as your bike

mollyjynxjax 28

Thursday 6 June 2013 16:15

The guy admitted it was his stolen bike!

MysticMonkey 9

Thursday 6 June 2013 17:36

Could have stolen it off someone else

HumanWiki 8

Thursday 6 June 2013 15:38

Come back with a lead pipe

H8t2crapOnUrDay 6

Thursday 6 June 2013 15:51

what would suck is if he tried to do that... lost the fight... and got something else stolen lol.

Zebediabolical 39

Thursday 6 June 2013 16:09

I'm kind of curious as to how OP identified the bike as his a couple years later. They make more than one of each model after all. If there's an identifying mark on it just grab hold and refuse to let go while screaming for a cop. Not many thieves will stick around with that kind of crap going on.